I Don't Wanna Be Myself
Day 6, 10 AM, post-announcement: Open
I Don't Wanna Be Myself
((Diego Larrosa continues from RICH_BOY_LIKES_IT_ROUGH.MP4))
There was something to be said about everything coming to a full circle now, coming back to the force that had bid Diego on his way down the path of violence all those days ago, but the metaphor merely occurred to him, and nothing more. He had groaned when he came out of the forest to see the pier, cursed under his breath, but that was it. The ocean was an ocean. He had killed a man, and yet it seemed just as insurmountable now as it had that night.
The air hung still, as if still shocked silent at what had happened yesterday, and so the ocean didn't speak, and the metaphor remained dead. The sun had risen already, and heat collected in the atmosphere, oppressive. There was also the stench of dried blood, but that was par for the course by this time. Diego laid on the pier, meters from where Chris died, shirt off. He felt vulnerable doing so, but the fabric stuck to him and intensified the feeling of wanting to claw off his own skin. There was also the want to be seen this way, but those feelings didn't deserve to be given consideration.
A quiet mix of shame and regret roiled within Diego. He wasn't sure whether it was that he hadn't been good enough for Lorenzo, or that he'd tried to be good enough for him in the first place. Part of him felt that the latter was more because it was what was expected of him, because he was supposed to feel bad for doing the bidding of a murderer, but what society expected of him always set in, became his own feelings about himself later on. There had been a time he hadn't hated himself for being who he was, when he was a child, but it was a mere years-old memory of a memory, and the feeling felt completely alien now.
There was also this nothingness inside him, a space that formed as he tried and failed to process that the gardening club was down one, and that Declyn was responsible. They were best friends, Declyn and Drew. The announcements had called it simple and effective. Quick, in other words.
Drew had a puppy, its name was Wolf, and he had seen it a few times when the club met up at Drew's house. And he laughed whenever the two interacted, Drew and Wolf, because he viewed them as analogues of one another. Drew was a human puppy, basically, and Declyn had killed him. And there was a disgust that came with that realization. Declyn probably had his reasons, it seemed unfathomable that he'd kill Drew without one, but the disgust remained, and Diego realized that was probably what the rest of them, the gardening club, the island, thought of him, also.
The island knew his name now.
And so the dread that came with that was most of what roiled inside Diego. The sun was up, the announcements had happened. He had chosen this place specifically because it had just been a danger zone. No one else would be here. He'd been lucky enough to avoid people since leaving Lorenzo, and he didn't want to see people now or ever. He was hated, now. But, part of him also wanted it to be over with. The dread had weighed on him for the better part of a day now, kept him awake through most of the night. Countless scenarios of repudiation, confrontation had played out in his head, and he just wanted to face it already rather than imagine it.
"Come at me," he half-heartedly said to no one in particular, and he regretted the words as soon as they came out.
There was something to be said about everything coming to a full circle now, coming back to the force that had bid Diego on his way down the path of violence all those days ago, but the metaphor merely occurred to him, and nothing more. He had groaned when he came out of the forest to see the pier, cursed under his breath, but that was it. The ocean was an ocean. He had killed a man, and yet it seemed just as insurmountable now as it had that night.
The air hung still, as if still shocked silent at what had happened yesterday, and so the ocean didn't speak, and the metaphor remained dead. The sun had risen already, and heat collected in the atmosphere, oppressive. There was also the stench of dried blood, but that was par for the course by this time. Diego laid on the pier, meters from where Chris died, shirt off. He felt vulnerable doing so, but the fabric stuck to him and intensified the feeling of wanting to claw off his own skin. There was also the want to be seen this way, but those feelings didn't deserve to be given consideration.
A quiet mix of shame and regret roiled within Diego. He wasn't sure whether it was that he hadn't been good enough for Lorenzo, or that he'd tried to be good enough for him in the first place. Part of him felt that the latter was more because it was what was expected of him, because he was supposed to feel bad for doing the bidding of a murderer, but what society expected of him always set in, became his own feelings about himself later on. There had been a time he hadn't hated himself for being who he was, when he was a child, but it was a mere years-old memory of a memory, and the feeling felt completely alien now.
There was also this nothingness inside him, a space that formed as he tried and failed to process that the gardening club was down one, and that Declyn was responsible. They were best friends, Declyn and Drew. The announcements had called it simple and effective. Quick, in other words.
Drew had a puppy, its name was Wolf, and he had seen it a few times when the club met up at Drew's house. And he laughed whenever the two interacted, Drew and Wolf, because he viewed them as analogues of one another. Drew was a human puppy, basically, and Declyn had killed him. And there was a disgust that came with that realization. Declyn probably had his reasons, it seemed unfathomable that he'd kill Drew without one, but the disgust remained, and Diego realized that was probably what the rest of them, the gardening club, the island, thought of him, also.
The island knew his name now.
And so the dread that came with that was most of what roiled inside Diego. The sun was up, the announcements had happened. He had chosen this place specifically because it had just been a danger zone. No one else would be here. He'd been lucky enough to avoid people since leaving Lorenzo, and he didn't want to see people now or ever. He was hated, now. But, part of him also wanted it to be over with. The dread had weighed on him for the better part of a day now, kept him awake through most of the night. Countless scenarios of repudiation, confrontation had played out in his head, and he just wanted to face it already rather than imagine it.
"Come at me," he half-heartedly said to no one in particular, and he regretted the words as soon as they came out.
Okay.
((Billy Trevino continued from i see u))
Billy's wandering had brought him back to the pier, which was a lot less crowded sometime. He thought he'd get to have a nice solitary stroll along the water as he considered the day's announcements and his continued powerlessness, but instead he found a boy lying down on the pier with his shirt off. He, of course, considered turning around, but then the boy spoke. When he instructed Billy to, "come at him", Billy was taken aback. He really hadn't thought he'd been noticed. Though the way he said it was weird, too, kind of empty. Billy, perhaps against his best interest, decided to oblige. He approached, keeping his hand on the pepper spray can.
As he got closer to the boy, Billy had to judge whether he was a threat. he didn't look dangerous - hell, he barely looked alive, lying there. He was however, surrounded by a few blood spattered implements that raised some alarm bells. A bloody shovel and a bloody sword. It looked like he had been in a few scrapes, and had somehow gotten himself a second- wait.
That sword looked very familiar.
"Hey," he said. His throat was dry, and it came out raspy. He cleared his throat and continued. "What are you doing?"
His eyes drifted back to the sword. A fencing saber. Dirtier than when he'd last seen it, but unmistakable. Billy didn't think the terrorists gave out duplicate weapons.
"And where'd you get that sword?"
((Billy Trevino continued from i see u))
Billy's wandering had brought him back to the pier, which was a lot less crowded sometime. He thought he'd get to have a nice solitary stroll along the water as he considered the day's announcements and his continued powerlessness, but instead he found a boy lying down on the pier with his shirt off. He, of course, considered turning around, but then the boy spoke. When he instructed Billy to, "come at him", Billy was taken aback. He really hadn't thought he'd been noticed. Though the way he said it was weird, too, kind of empty. Billy, perhaps against his best interest, decided to oblige. He approached, keeping his hand on the pepper spray can.
As he got closer to the boy, Billy had to judge whether he was a threat. he didn't look dangerous - hell, he barely looked alive, lying there. He was however, surrounded by a few blood spattered implements that raised some alarm bells. A bloody shovel and a bloody sword. It looked like he had been in a few scrapes, and had somehow gotten himself a second- wait.
That sword looked very familiar.
"Hey," he said. His throat was dry, and it came out raspy. He cleared his throat and continued. "What are you doing?"
His eyes drifted back to the sword. A fencing saber. Dirtier than when he'd last seen it, but unmistakable. Billy didn't think the terrorists gave out duplicate weapons.
"And where'd you get that sword?"
The world answered Diego's request, and so a man arrived, his voice unfamiliar.
He rolled his head over, recognized Billy, alone. He was a moderately attractive face to him, nothing more. Diego assumed that he was just a face to Billy, as well.
"Just getting some sun," he replied to the first question. He followed it up with laughter that died in his throat as soon as it came.
And then the second question came, and Diego froze.
The announcements had come already, and yet, Billy observed him with curiosity and not hostility. Diego hadn't heard Billy's name on the announcements, which was good, but Billy had heard Diego's. And there was hesitation, uncertainty in the way Billy regarded Diego's weapons, but not hostility.
He didn't know his name.
The thought stung a bit. He would die unknown to some of his classmates on this island. But, it was good here.
This interaction was their first impression of one another, an impression marred with the presence of two bloody weapons lying next to him. Just because he had hoped no one would come didn't mean that no one would come. He never, ever planned ahead, and this was what he got. But, he had the chance to shape the interaction, at least.
He pushed himself up with his arms, and pulled the two weapons towards him.
"W— I got the weapon from Justin. Wanted to keep him from killing more people. Not sure if that worked out, but, I got it."
Half-truths had worked with Justin, he hoped Billy was just as stupid. Stupid enough to not notice that he almost said we instead of I. He felt his face reddening, he all of a sudden wanted the feeling of fabric clinging to his skin again, he felt so exposed, but his shirt was in his bag, and if he distracted himself with putting clothes on, BIlly could take advantage of that. In a few minutes, probably, Billy would see past him and either confront him or leave him behind, but that time hadn't come yet. He was still just another nameless victim trapped on the island, for now, so he intended to savor it.
"How's— uh, how's your time been so far?"
There was a lump in his throat, and he swallowed it down. He continued looking toward Billy, but no eye contact. He'd never been good at that.
He rolled his head over, recognized Billy, alone. He was a moderately attractive face to him, nothing more. Diego assumed that he was just a face to Billy, as well.
"Just getting some sun," he replied to the first question. He followed it up with laughter that died in his throat as soon as it came.
And then the second question came, and Diego froze.
The announcements had come already, and yet, Billy observed him with curiosity and not hostility. Diego hadn't heard Billy's name on the announcements, which was good, but Billy had heard Diego's. And there was hesitation, uncertainty in the way Billy regarded Diego's weapons, but not hostility.
He didn't know his name.
The thought stung a bit. He would die unknown to some of his classmates on this island. But, it was good here.
This interaction was their first impression of one another, an impression marred with the presence of two bloody weapons lying next to him. Just because he had hoped no one would come didn't mean that no one would come. He never, ever planned ahead, and this was what he got. But, he had the chance to shape the interaction, at least.
He pushed himself up with his arms, and pulled the two weapons towards him.
"W— I got the weapon from Justin. Wanted to keep him from killing more people. Not sure if that worked out, but, I got it."
Half-truths had worked with Justin, he hoped Billy was just as stupid. Stupid enough to not notice that he almost said we instead of I. He felt his face reddening, he all of a sudden wanted the feeling of fabric clinging to his skin again, he felt so exposed, but his shirt was in his bag, and if he distracted himself with putting clothes on, BIlly could take advantage of that. In a few minutes, probably, Billy would see past him and either confront him or leave him behind, but that time hadn't come yet. He was still just another nameless victim trapped on the island, for now, so he intended to savor it.
"How's— uh, how's your time been so far?"
There was a lump in his throat, and he swallowed it down. He continued looking toward Billy, but no eye contact. He'd never been good at that.
"Alright."
It was believable. Justin was the one who had killed Mac. This boy took the sword from Justin. It all worked. Still Billy didn't know who he was. That was dangerous out here. He could've been on the announcements, for all Billy knew. The boy looked nervous, certainly, as he pushed himself up and tried his best not to look Billy in the eye.
"How's it been?" Billy laughed "Personally, I've been having a great time."
He stayed where he was, trying not to show his trepidation.
"I got my water laced with acid earlier- that was fun."
His eyes went back to the saber again. He remembered thinking how cool it was when MacKenzie was holding it, how it would help them. Was it weird to be nostalgic about things that had happened a few days earlier, at the beginning of the death game? It felt weird.
"The sword... it was MacKenzie Baker's originally, before Justin took it. I was with her at the beginning. She... really just gave me nothing but trouble. But now that she's gone..."
He drifted off. The boy didn't need to hear this.
"Well, it's stupid, but I'm glad you took it from him. So thanks."
He hesitated, looking back at the boy.
"What's your name, anyway?"
It was believable. Justin was the one who had killed Mac. This boy took the sword from Justin. It all worked. Still Billy didn't know who he was. That was dangerous out here. He could've been on the announcements, for all Billy knew. The boy looked nervous, certainly, as he pushed himself up and tried his best not to look Billy in the eye.
"How's it been?" Billy laughed "Personally, I've been having a great time."
He stayed where he was, trying not to show his trepidation.
"I got my water laced with acid earlier- that was fun."
His eyes went back to the saber again. He remembered thinking how cool it was when MacKenzie was holding it, how it would help them. Was it weird to be nostalgic about things that had happened a few days earlier, at the beginning of the death game? It felt weird.
"The sword... it was MacKenzie Baker's originally, before Justin took it. I was with her at the beginning. She... really just gave me nothing but trouble. But now that she's gone..."
He drifted off. The boy didn't need to hear this.
"Well, it's stupid, but I'm glad you took it from him. So thanks."
He hesitated, looking back at the boy.
"What's your name, anyway?"
"Lucas," Diego said without thinking. There were at least five other Lucas' in the school, he doubted Billy kept track of all of them, hoped and prayed he didn't.
Lies mixed with the truth, Diego remembered. They had worked with Justin, it looked like they would work with Billy. Enough for him to leave him alone, hopefully.
Part of the reason Diego had been so content to stay in the background of most social interactions back in high school, aside from it being practically asked of him, was that it was easy. Listening was a passive activity. You just nodded, agreed at opportune times, laughed when prompted, and that was it. Replying, on the other hand, required keeping track of context, making sure the content of what you were saying was worthwhile, making sure to insert yourself enough, but not too much, lest you overstep your space and step on the feet of others. Lots of variables to keep track of, lots of rules. He never understood how people were able to get the hang of it. He just nodded and pretended.
He knew one rule that was safe to abide by was reciprocity. He shares a story, you share a somewhat related story. He talks about his first day on the island, you talk about your first day on the island.
He felt it was safe to talk about how his first couple of days actually went, for the most part. Diego was nameless to Billy, anyways, it wasn't like he could verify the stories with anyone else, barring some instance of serendipity. He just had to avoid talking about Lorenzo, and that was easy enough. It was for the best he left his time with him unspoken.
Speaking his name still hurt.
"Anyways, you're welcome," he replied, gesturing to the saber. It sounded a lot nicer, the way he put it. Just a heroic act. He could almost live with himself if that was how it had happened.
"And, sorry to hear about Kenzie," Diego said. And he was. Kenzie had been nice to him, he recalled. Another friend of a friend, on the same level as Chris. He wondered if Billy had seen her die, too. If he'd considered going on the same path Diego had, for a while. "I, uh, get what you're going through, I guess. I had a friend with me when I woke up, Chris. We'd only been together for a couple hours when she got killed by Ty."
He looked at the coagulated blood on the pier, stared for more than a few seconds. He suddenly wished he had talked about something else, but here he was.
Throat bled dry, throat scratched raw.
A physical shudder went through Diego, goosebumps on his chest. He shook his head.
"Sorry. It just, uh. It happened here. So. Not as fun as getting drugged with acid," he said, followed with a half-dead laugh.
"What's acid feel like, anyways? Never got to try it, before," he said, finally looking at Billy. That felt like a more pleasant topic. Safer, too, farther from the truth.
Lies mixed with the truth, Diego remembered. They had worked with Justin, it looked like they would work with Billy. Enough for him to leave him alone, hopefully.
Part of the reason Diego had been so content to stay in the background of most social interactions back in high school, aside from it being practically asked of him, was that it was easy. Listening was a passive activity. You just nodded, agreed at opportune times, laughed when prompted, and that was it. Replying, on the other hand, required keeping track of context, making sure the content of what you were saying was worthwhile, making sure to insert yourself enough, but not too much, lest you overstep your space and step on the feet of others. Lots of variables to keep track of, lots of rules. He never understood how people were able to get the hang of it. He just nodded and pretended.
He knew one rule that was safe to abide by was reciprocity. He shares a story, you share a somewhat related story. He talks about his first day on the island, you talk about your first day on the island.
He felt it was safe to talk about how his first couple of days actually went, for the most part. Diego was nameless to Billy, anyways, it wasn't like he could verify the stories with anyone else, barring some instance of serendipity. He just had to avoid talking about Lorenzo, and that was easy enough. It was for the best he left his time with him unspoken.
Speaking his name still hurt.
"Anyways, you're welcome," he replied, gesturing to the saber. It sounded a lot nicer, the way he put it. Just a heroic act. He could almost live with himself if that was how it had happened.
"And, sorry to hear about Kenzie," Diego said. And he was. Kenzie had been nice to him, he recalled. Another friend of a friend, on the same level as Chris. He wondered if Billy had seen her die, too. If he'd considered going on the same path Diego had, for a while. "I, uh, get what you're going through, I guess. I had a friend with me when I woke up, Chris. We'd only been together for a couple hours when she got killed by Ty."
He looked at the coagulated blood on the pier, stared for more than a few seconds. He suddenly wished he had talked about something else, but here he was.
Throat bled dry, throat scratched raw.
A physical shudder went through Diego, goosebumps on his chest. He shook his head.
"Sorry. It just, uh. It happened here. So. Not as fun as getting drugged with acid," he said, followed with a half-dead laugh.
"What's acid feel like, anyways? Never got to try it, before," he said, finally looking at Billy. That felt like a more pleasant topic. Safer, too, farther from the truth.
Lucas
His eyes narrowed. He knew there were a bunch of Lucases in the school, but he didn't remember there this one. It'd be a good fake name, wouldn't it? Most people would just accept he was one of the many Luci and move on. Billy, however, had grown far too paranoid to just move on.
He stepped closer to Lucas, eyes repeatedly drifting over to the saber and the shovel. They were both covered in blood, a lot of blood. Enough blood to look like they could have been used to kill someone. They were decent weapons, in the right hands...
"Mmm. Oh, sorry to hear about that." his response to Diego's statement was delayed. He was only half-listening. The question about acid snapped him back to attention. He remembered yelling, spraying Mac in the face for no good reason, running off into the woods, alone.
"Acid... it's powerful. You can't really control what you experience, you're just along for the ride. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad. When you don't know you're on acid and you're already afraid for your life, it's... very bad."
He looked over the boy again. He was... Asian, right? He didn't remember an Asian Lucas. There was Facebook Lucas, of course. Then womanizer Lucas, dominatrix mom Lucas... were there any others? He tried to remember. He couldn't recall any others.
"What's your last name?"
His eyes narrowed. He knew there were a bunch of Lucases in the school, but he didn't remember there this one. It'd be a good fake name, wouldn't it? Most people would just accept he was one of the many Luci and move on. Billy, however, had grown far too paranoid to just move on.
He stepped closer to Lucas, eyes repeatedly drifting over to the saber and the shovel. They were both covered in blood, a lot of blood. Enough blood to look like they could have been used to kill someone. They were decent weapons, in the right hands...
"Mmm. Oh, sorry to hear about that." his response to Diego's statement was delayed. He was only half-listening. The question about acid snapped him back to attention. He remembered yelling, spraying Mac in the face for no good reason, running off into the woods, alone.
"Acid... it's powerful. You can't really control what you experience, you're just along for the ride. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad. When you don't know you're on acid and you're already afraid for your life, it's... very bad."
He looked over the boy again. He was... Asian, right? He didn't remember an Asian Lucas. There was Facebook Lucas, of course. Then womanizer Lucas, dominatrix mom Lucas... were there any others? He tried to remember. He couldn't recall any others.
"What's your last name?"
- BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 682
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: The Zone™
Danya's voice left Camilla in silence.
The taste her breath left in her mouth was like salt, in how it dried things out.
"Diego..." she murmured to herself.
Was this how she was supposed to feel about Julien, when she heard his name on the announcement? But he didn't surprise her. She knew them- both of them.
At least she knew Julien, anyway.
[Camilla Bell continued from Evanescent]
They wandered, after those announcements. Even Camilla was surprised at how her desire to find Diego was only heightened. After all, imagine what he had heard on those announcements- a friend killing a friend, one of their own.
They needed to talk.
Now the sea was in sight, and she could see a pier, two people on it. She squinted, and trudged towards them, though her body was weighed down by yet another sleepless night. The mornings were always the hardest, after an all-nighter. Back home she'd be more-or-less functional once she ate lunch, but lunch didn't have the same effect- obviously.
The image of the two boys got clearer. She couldn't recognize one, but the other?
She wasn't sure if it was an act of cruel fate or a merciful one.
"Diego...?" she asked, to the wind, as she approached the pier. "Diego!" she called with a bit more resoluteness. A cry of relief for seeing a friend after a long time.
It was the way her mom would shout her name to call her, when she was little.
The taste her breath left in her mouth was like salt, in how it dried things out.
"Diego..." she murmured to herself.
Was this how she was supposed to feel about Julien, when she heard his name on the announcement? But he didn't surprise her. She knew them- both of them.
At least she knew Julien, anyway.
[Camilla Bell continued from Evanescent]
They wandered, after those announcements. Even Camilla was surprised at how her desire to find Diego was only heightened. After all, imagine what he had heard on those announcements- a friend killing a friend, one of their own.
They needed to talk.
Now the sea was in sight, and she could see a pier, two people on it. She squinted, and trudged towards them, though her body was weighed down by yet another sleepless night. The mornings were always the hardest, after an all-nighter. Back home she'd be more-or-less functional once she ate lunch, but lunch didn't have the same effect- obviously.
The image of the two boys got clearer. She couldn't recognize one, but the other?
She wasn't sure if it was an act of cruel fate or a merciful one.
"Diego...?" she asked, to the wind, as she approached the pier. "Diego!" she called with a bit more resoluteness. A cry of relief for seeing a friend after a long time.
It was the way her mom would shout her name to call her, when she was little.
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
[Declyn Grayson-Anthis continued from Evanescent]
Declyn shot a look of disbelief towards Camilla— and in an instant hurried closer to her with rather small steps. He had been doing his best to walk in the shadows. The more he was sweating, the more uncomfortable the collar felt. The back of his neck felt sunburned, which is why he had put some of the burn relief gel onto said spot as well as onto his nose and cheeks, hoping it would prevent more damage.
“Is it really—”
Trailing off, he could only stare when he saw Diego and someone whose name didn’t come to mind. Oh, hi there dread of the discomfort of the upcoming conversation that was suddenly real. If the last announcement had taught him one thing, it was that, at that moment, no one knew the whole truth but the killers themselves. People will categorize you into something you don’t want. While he understood why that was, the shot hadn’t been as easy and simple as it was described on the announcement. Provocation seemed the real purpose.
He glanced up at the side of Camilla’s face again, digging his fingernails into his palm, and waited for the two to notice them.
Declyn shot a look of disbelief towards Camilla— and in an instant hurried closer to her with rather small steps. He had been doing his best to walk in the shadows. The more he was sweating, the more uncomfortable the collar felt. The back of his neck felt sunburned, which is why he had put some of the burn relief gel onto said spot as well as onto his nose and cheeks, hoping it would prevent more damage.
“Is it really—”
Trailing off, he could only stare when he saw Diego and someone whose name didn’t come to mind. Oh, hi there dread of the discomfort of the upcoming conversation that was suddenly real. If the last announcement had taught him one thing, it was that, at that moment, no one knew the whole truth but the killers themselves. People will categorize you into something you don’t want. While he understood why that was, the shot hadn’t been as easy and simple as it was described on the announcement. Provocation seemed the real purpose.
He glanced up at the side of Camilla’s face again, digging his fingernails into his palm, and waited for the two to notice them.
- Primrosette
- Posts: 1033
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- Location: In the Dark Abyss
He felt himself wanted to take a nap.
((Adonis Cohen continued from Our Mutual Fiend))
Adonis was panting softly as he stopped by a tree near the pier and he was glad that it didn't take him too long to get there from the infirmary. He was hidden behind the tree as he could see the group of people together and he was trying to think of what he was supposed to do next. He couldn't go up to them like he was casually fine as he wasn't okay and he didn't want anyone to care about his well being anymore. He didn't want their pity. He wanted them to be scared of him.
I wonder how Myles is doing. Maybe I could made him my cute little pet-
His train of thought was interrupted when he saw someone who was familiar by their hairstyle and his breathing was a bit choked up for a moment.
Declyn....
Adonis felt his smile widen more sinisterly.
This is definitely going to be more fun for me. Heh....
((Adonis Cohen continued from Our Mutual Fiend))
Adonis was panting softly as he stopped by a tree near the pier and he was glad that it didn't take him too long to get there from the infirmary. He was hidden behind the tree as he could see the group of people together and he was trying to think of what he was supposed to do next. He couldn't go up to them like he was casually fine as he wasn't okay and he didn't want anyone to care about his well being anymore. He didn't want their pity. He wanted them to be scared of him.
I wonder how Myles is doing. Maybe I could made him my cute little pet-
His train of thought was interrupted when he saw someone who was familiar by their hairstyle and his breathing was a bit choked up for a moment.
Declyn....
Adonis felt his smile widen more sinisterly.
This is definitely going to be more fun for me. Heh....
-
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- Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2019 2:19 pm
(Theophilus "Theo" Walterson continued from Evanescent)
When they had set off, Theo had been full of nervous enthusiasm. The long, aimless trudge around the island serve as a somewhat sour reminder that good intentions did not necessarily ensure good results, and by the time they reached the pier, he was decidedly dispirited.
At some point the announcements came on. This time, though, he listened intently, waiting for news of what really happened the night before. Somewhat predictably, the announcements offered nothing that he didn't already know. At the sound of Diego's name, he winced slightly, and he spent the rest of the day wondering if this could have been avoided.
An hour or so later, though, their arrival at the pier suddenly broke the monotony, and he smiled instinctively as he saw Diego. A part of him wanted to run up to him immediately, but, not wanting to interrupt whatever Diego was doing, he waved and remained silent. When Camilla called to out to Diego, he felt vaguely uncomfortable but said nothing, simply hoping for the best.
When they had set off, Theo had been full of nervous enthusiasm. The long, aimless trudge around the island serve as a somewhat sour reminder that good intentions did not necessarily ensure good results, and by the time they reached the pier, he was decidedly dispirited.
At some point the announcements came on. This time, though, he listened intently, waiting for news of what really happened the night before. Somewhat predictably, the announcements offered nothing that he didn't already know. At the sound of Diego's name, he winced slightly, and he spent the rest of the day wondering if this could have been avoided.
An hour or so later, though, their arrival at the pier suddenly broke the monotony, and he smiled instinctively as he saw Diego. A part of him wanted to run up to him immediately, but, not wanting to interrupt whatever Diego was doing, he waved and remained silent. When Camilla called to out to Diego, he felt vaguely uncomfortable but said nothing, simply hoping for the best.
"Lopez," he replied to Billy. Diego felt immediately that that was a wrong answer, an unconvincing answer, what with the alliteration and the fact that one of the Lucas' had Diaz, another Hispanic last name, but it was all he had in mind at the moment, and any hesitation would be a fatal mistake, maybe literally.
Billy's eyes narrowed, went up and down. They regarded Diego, the weapons he had in hand, and it felt as if he was trying to look inside him, and the feeling left Diego feeling even more naked. Though there was no breeze coming from the sea, he still felt so cold, so exposed. Shivers ran down along his spine, goosebumps raised along the bare skin on his back.
"Trevino, right?" Rule of reciprocity. He could at least pretend this was a normal conversation, right? Live as Lucas, live as an innocent for a few more moments.
And then he heard a voice in the distance, and those moments passed.
Diego wanted to cry. He imagined breaking down right there, in front of everyone, but the sight was pathetic because no one would take pity on him, no one would feel sorry for him because he wasn't the victim here. Billy, Camilla, Declyn, Theo, they would all look upon him crying, and they would not comfort him. They would condemn him and shout at him and berate him and maybe even try to kill him because that was what he deserved. He was a murderer who was being rightfully exposed for his crimes in front of his friends, this was what he deserved. And this scene that played in his head made him feel so alone, like when Lorenzo had abandoned him.
He decided not to cry. He didn't deserve it, anyways.
He wouldn't be able to work well with two weapons, so with one arm, he dumped the shovel into the sea, and he felt a twinge of sadness as it sank. With the other arm, he tightened his grip on the saber, stepped further back into the pier. He wanted to raise his weapon at Billy, drive him back, but the gardening club was right there. They would hate him anyways, but he didn't want to give them more reason, as if it would matter.
He looked at Camilla, acknowledged his lie. "Hey there," he said.
He turned his gaze back to Billy. He wanted to say more, explain himself, but there was nothing to explain. He lied, he had been caught, all he had to do was wait for the consequences now.
Billy's eyes narrowed, went up and down. They regarded Diego, the weapons he had in hand, and it felt as if he was trying to look inside him, and the feeling left Diego feeling even more naked. Though there was no breeze coming from the sea, he still felt so cold, so exposed. Shivers ran down along his spine, goosebumps raised along the bare skin on his back.
"Trevino, right?" Rule of reciprocity. He could at least pretend this was a normal conversation, right? Live as Lucas, live as an innocent for a few more moments.
And then he heard a voice in the distance, and those moments passed.
Diego wanted to cry. He imagined breaking down right there, in front of everyone, but the sight was pathetic because no one would take pity on him, no one would feel sorry for him because he wasn't the victim here. Billy, Camilla, Declyn, Theo, they would all look upon him crying, and they would not comfort him. They would condemn him and shout at him and berate him and maybe even try to kill him because that was what he deserved. He was a murderer who was being rightfully exposed for his crimes in front of his friends, this was what he deserved. And this scene that played in his head made him feel so alone, like when Lorenzo had abandoned him.
He decided not to cry. He didn't deserve it, anyways.
He wouldn't be able to work well with two weapons, so with one arm, he dumped the shovel into the sea, and he felt a twinge of sadness as it sank. With the other arm, he tightened his grip on the saber, stepped further back into the pier. He wanted to raise his weapon at Billy, drive him back, but the gardening club was right there. They would hate him anyways, but he didn't want to give them more reason, as if it would matter.
He looked at Camilla, acknowledged his lie. "Hey there," he said.
He turned his gaze back to Billy. He wanted to say more, explain himself, but there was nothing to explain. He lied, he had been caught, all he had to do was wait for the consequences now.
Well.
He'd be lying if he said he was surprised.
Newcomers off to the side. One, two... three people had assembled further up the pier. They knew the kid- Diego, somehow. But they were staying off to the side, for now. Watching. Exposing the killer but not interfering.
Diego stood on the other side, holding the sword. Staring, but saying nothing. He was probably thinking that it was pointless to try to explain himself. He was right. The sword was lowered. That was Diego's mistake.
Billy rushed forward, bringing the pepper spray can up as he did. He pressed on the nozzle.
He'd be lying if he said he was surprised.
Newcomers off to the side. One, two... three people had assembled further up the pier. They knew the kid- Diego, somehow. But they were staying off to the side, for now. Watching. Exposing the killer but not interfering.
Diego stood on the other side, holding the sword. Staring, but saying nothing. He was probably thinking that it was pointless to try to explain himself. He was right. The sword was lowered. That was Diego's mistake.
Billy rushed forward, bringing the pepper spray can up as he did. He pressed on the nozzle.
"What the fu-"
Instinct came a second too late. The saber waved around wildly in Diego's hand, catching on Billy's arm as it swung upwards. It fell into the water, and Diego followed, head first.
He never learned how to swim. It had been one of the first regrets that came to him, after he woke up to the ocean, that he would never learn to swim. The ocean had called him then, pulled on him, and it came to claim him now.
Diego's arms splashed wildly around, struggling and failing to find something to hold onto. He was short, small, his feet couldn't find ground. The first gulps of water started to enter his lungs.
Instinct came a second too late. The saber waved around wildly in Diego's hand, catching on Billy's arm as it swung upwards. It fell into the water, and Diego followed, head first.
He never learned how to swim. It had been one of the first regrets that came to him, after he woke up to the ocean, that he would never learn to swim. The ocean had called him then, pulled on him, and it came to claim him now.
Diego's arms splashed wildly around, struggling and failing to find something to hold onto. He was short, small, his feet couldn't find ground. The first gulps of water started to enter his lungs.
- BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 682
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: The Zone™
Diego's gaze was that of someone who was guilty. Felt guilty. In a way, it made Camilla a little relieved? But at the same time, she hated seeing him like that- she hated seeing any of them like that.
She just kept walking towards Diego, and the other boy. Wasn't sure about his name, but she didn't need to be. While eye contact and Camilla didn't always see eye-to-eye, she did for Diego. She had to. He had to know- and her eyes would say it better than her words ever could.
Hopefully, it would be obvious that what was on Camilla's expression wasn't anger.
It was pain. Exhaustion, too.
It quickly turned to alarm.
"WaitwaitWAIT-" she cried out as she dashed towards Diego, but it was too late. He fell into the water. Camilla stood staring over the edge of the pier, as he began to thrash.
She took one look back at Billy, wanting to be angry. But it was understandable.
Looking back to the water, she took a deep breath.
And dove into the water.
She just kept walking towards Diego, and the other boy. Wasn't sure about his name, but she didn't need to be. While eye contact and Camilla didn't always see eye-to-eye, she did for Diego. She had to. He had to know- and her eyes would say it better than her words ever could.
Hopefully, it would be obvious that what was on Camilla's expression wasn't anger.
It was pain. Exhaustion, too.
It quickly turned to alarm.
"WaitwaitWAIT-" she cried out as she dashed towards Diego, but it was too late. He fell into the water. Camilla stood staring over the edge of the pier, as he began to thrash.
She took one look back at Billy, wanting to be angry. But it was understandable.
Looking back to the water, she took a deep breath.
And dove into the water.
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
“HEY!”
The focus only sharpened on Billy and Diego after the spray and splash. Hesitation hit him but passed as quickly as it came along with the impulse which gave him his list of virtues and vices. It had also risen from the fear of getting a taste of the pepper spray, which, as much as hunger had caught up on him, would certainly not be a nice meal.
Declyn was in the very back behind everyone else and wanted to catch up, to help, to be there for his friend. They had reached their goal of finding Diego, which was good, but the matter wasn’t checked off just yet. He rushed forward.
Now what he hadn’t seen coming was the sudden strong arm that grabbed him from behind and held him around his waist. Declyn let out a surprised wheeze and twisted his ankle slightly in the sudden stop, groaning.
Before he could turn his head to see who it was, he felt a hand over his mouth.
The focus only sharpened on Billy and Diego after the spray and splash. Hesitation hit him but passed as quickly as it came along with the impulse which gave him his list of virtues and vices. It had also risen from the fear of getting a taste of the pepper spray, which, as much as hunger had caught up on him, would certainly not be a nice meal.
Declyn was in the very back behind everyone else and wanted to catch up, to help, to be there for his friend. They had reached their goal of finding Diego, which was good, but the matter wasn’t checked off just yet. He rushed forward.
Now what he hadn’t seen coming was the sudden strong arm that grabbed him from behind and held him around his waist. Declyn let out a surprised wheeze and twisted his ankle slightly in the sudden stop, groaning.
Before he could turn his head to see who it was, he felt a hand over his mouth.