Once the physical support broke off, Declyn felt his jaw clench, ever so slightly, and did his best to calmly turn and pick his gun back up. Putting it back in its holster in a swifter move, he suddenly raised his voice.
"There was NO. TIME."
There never was, was there? You ask yourself every question you can think of already, what, why, someone else does the same, and then at some point, your sadness turns to anger. But it wasn't only aimed at Theo. He was gesturing with his hands to emphasize his words.
"He ASKED ME to do it! I could have gone back and waited, talked to everyone, sure, but… I mean, why? To make myself feel better? Make you feel better? To make you guys watch me BLOW his FUCKING HEART OUT?!??.... While he would have suffered all the more-"
A frustrated sob interrupted him while his eyes were drying.
"He couldn't even move. I tried. Just trust me this once. I wanted to lift him up but he didn't want me to. He said he loves you, all of you, all of us, and he did not want you guys to see him like this. Not anyone, really." He ran his hands through his own hair. "He was my best friend so… just … don't ..."
Looking at a random spot on the ground, his expression turned extremely bitter. It wouldn't stay like this for long.
"I…. I need to get something from my bag," he said simply,
and then walked away.
Evanescent
Soon passing out of sight, memory, or existence; quickly fading or disappearing. (Private and Day 5. After 3am)
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 682
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: The Zone™
Theo's response was washed away by Declyn shouting- was he shouting or was that just the angriest she ever heard him and how much that shocked her to hear especially directed to a friend?
Was it something she said? Or was it something Theo said and she was just doing the thing where she thought everything was her fault again? It wasn't like she could grasp what he was saying, but in the end it was always her fault, wasn't it? It was her fault she wasn't there on that first day with Drew, that she didn't find him sooner, that she wasted her first day with some fucking player hunter group and now she was stuck with ANOTHER ONE except they were ACROSS THE FUCKING ISLAND and-
Tears in her eyes again. She had some left, after all. Finally, she broke her gaze away from Drew, seeing Declyn walking away.
"Declyn-"
Her voice was shaky, desperate, as if crying for a parent to come back. How pathetic.
"Declyn, WAIT!"
Just that yelp strained her voice and she wasn't even sure what she'd say afterwards.
How pathetic.
Was it something she said? Or was it something Theo said and she was just doing the thing where she thought everything was her fault again? It wasn't like she could grasp what he was saying, but in the end it was always her fault, wasn't it? It was her fault she wasn't there on that first day with Drew, that she didn't find him sooner, that she wasted her first day with some fucking player hunter group and now she was stuck with ANOTHER ONE except they were ACROSS THE FUCKING ISLAND and-
Tears in her eyes again. She had some left, after all. Finally, she broke her gaze away from Drew, seeing Declyn walking away.
"Declyn-"
Her voice was shaky, desperate, as if crying for a parent to come back. How pathetic.
"Declyn, WAIT!"
Just that yelp strained her voice and she wasn't even sure what she'd say afterwards.
How pathetic.
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
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Jan de Witt
- Posts: 97
- Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2019 2:19 pm
As the expression in Declyn's eyes turned from pleading sorrow to bitter fury, Theo realized that in retrospect, expressing his resentments and frustrations to Declyn in full, just after a traumatic experience, may not have been the wisest choice. He winced as Declyn complained of the tense situation, the lack of time, and his own insensitivity.
His own frustrations faded into the background, replaced by a throbbing sense of guilt at having chosen to criticize rather than support his friends in a time of need. He tried to apologize, but the words stuck in his throat, held down by a sense of complicity in provoking Declyn in such a way. By the time he was able to mutter his first, faint apologies, Declyn was already out of earshot, unwilling to listen to anything more he might have had to say. He stayed there at first, afraid of inciting any more of Declyn's wrath by following him. Only once Declyn had walked out of sight did he dare to approach Declyn and Camilla, who had already begun without him.
Even as he followed the others, though, he remained at a clear distance away from them, not out of sight, but far away enough that he could be ignored. Perhaps Camilla would do better than he had? He doubted it, but waited for the others to speak anyway.
His own frustrations faded into the background, replaced by a throbbing sense of guilt at having chosen to criticize rather than support his friends in a time of need. He tried to apologize, but the words stuck in his throat, held down by a sense of complicity in provoking Declyn in such a way. By the time he was able to mutter his first, faint apologies, Declyn was already out of earshot, unwilling to listen to anything more he might have had to say. He stayed there at first, afraid of inciting any more of Declyn's wrath by following him. Only once Declyn had walked out of sight did he dare to approach Declyn and Camilla, who had already begun without him.
Even as he followed the others, though, he remained at a clear distance away from them, not out of sight, but far away enough that he could be ignored. Perhaps Camilla would do better than he had? He doubted it, but waited for the others to speak anyway.
“Chris, what… the fuck do I do…”
Kill one best friend and now turning to the other? But Christopher wasn’t here, thankfully. He was far away at home, waiting, wondering. There was a slight underlying chuckle accompanying the silent ask for help. What would Chris do? If making Declyn dye his hair green back then was a turning point to the person he was now, then maybe it was time for a different colour. Glancing down at his open hand, there very few options. What a bad deal.
He wasn’t ignoring Cam’s call, hearing that she started to follow him. Knowing that she would always be there for him, he assumed so at least, was a calming thought. He felt the same. Declyn wanted to be there for her. And for Theo, too.
He rubbed his eyes with his bandaged forearm, the rough sound only noticeable to him.
Do we blame the fragile flower? Or do we excuse its fragility and mourn the loss? Drew was securely tucked under the emergency blanket Declyn had gotten out of his bag, resting on a colourful spot next to a tree. He still hadn’t been able to look at him. Ever since his grandparents’ death, who he had spent the most time with in his early years back in England, he never wanted to look at a dead body ever again and preserve other, more important memories all the more. So far, he had been more or less lucky regarding this point, but he knew it could change the more they decided to wander around more. Distant gunshots and other unnerving sounds didn’t make that feel very welcome, neither did Danya confirming more names.
But he wasn’t going to give up, ever.
Declyn was on the spot where he had slept the previous night, sorting the stuff in Drew’s bag, stopping every now and then to shift into a different position whenever his legs started to hurt. His thoughts shifted constantly as well. From Axel, to
How IS Axel Doing, to
I Miss Cecil, to
Will I Ever Find Enough Resources To Build A Time Machine, to
How Much Damage Would That Do, to
Drew Had Barely Eaten Anything, to
Where Is Amelia, to
I Miss Cecil, to
I Wonder If The Phlox Seeds I Planted Next To Drew Will Grow.
He had bought the seeds in Washington D.C. for the club along with some other plants.
The next hours felt like going through a carwash without a car like he wasn’t displaced from ordinary life enough already.
It was hard to find a topic to talk about. It was always the same questions. Which didn't mean they were unnecessary. Declyn was looking through the bottle of LSD water which he had still left for.... emergencies? He was wondering what would happen if he were to take a small sip. Would it “help”? Everyone back in the leadership house had shown a different reaction to it. It was probably stupid to even think about it.
“Hey,” He glanced at the others. “Have either of you ever done drugs?"
Kill one best friend and now turning to the other? But Christopher wasn’t here, thankfully. He was far away at home, waiting, wondering. There was a slight underlying chuckle accompanying the silent ask for help. What would Chris do? If making Declyn dye his hair green back then was a turning point to the person he was now, then maybe it was time for a different colour. Glancing down at his open hand, there very few options. What a bad deal.
He wasn’t ignoring Cam’s call, hearing that she started to follow him. Knowing that she would always be there for him, he assumed so at least, was a calming thought. He felt the same. Declyn wanted to be there for her. And for Theo, too.
He rubbed his eyes with his bandaged forearm, the rough sound only noticeable to him.
Do we blame the fragile flower? Or do we excuse its fragility and mourn the loss? Drew was securely tucked under the emergency blanket Declyn had gotten out of his bag, resting on a colourful spot next to a tree. He still hadn’t been able to look at him. Ever since his grandparents’ death, who he had spent the most time with in his early years back in England, he never wanted to look at a dead body ever again and preserve other, more important memories all the more. So far, he had been more or less lucky regarding this point, but he knew it could change the more they decided to wander around more. Distant gunshots and other unnerving sounds didn’t make that feel very welcome, neither did Danya confirming more names.
But he wasn’t going to give up, ever.
Declyn was on the spot where he had slept the previous night, sorting the stuff in Drew’s bag, stopping every now and then to shift into a different position whenever his legs started to hurt. His thoughts shifted constantly as well. From Axel, to
How IS Axel Doing, to
I Miss Cecil, to
Will I Ever Find Enough Resources To Build A Time Machine, to
How Much Damage Would That Do, to
Drew Had Barely Eaten Anything, to
Where Is Amelia, to
I Miss Cecil, to
I Wonder If The Phlox Seeds I Planted Next To Drew Will Grow.
He had bought the seeds in Washington D.C. for the club along with some other plants.
The next hours felt like going through a carwash without a car like he wasn’t displaced from ordinary life enough already.
It was hard to find a topic to talk about. It was always the same questions. Which didn't mean they were unnecessary. Declyn was looking through the bottle of LSD water which he had still left for.... emergencies? He was wondering what would happen if he were to take a small sip. Would it “help”? Everyone back in the leadership house had shown a different reaction to it. It was probably stupid to even think about it.
“Hey,” He glanced at the others. “Have either of you ever done drugs?"
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 682
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: The Zone™
It would be nice if Camilla lost the ability to close her eyes. She remembered herself blinking during the night, as she stood guard. Even that felt unforgivable.
So she couldn't protect Drew. Maybe that was never on the table for her. Maybe it could be forgiven. But if she couldn't protect Declyn and Theo either?
What kind of excuse for a friend would she be then?
When morning came, she kept listening to the announcements. A nasty surprise awaited her but it wasn't really a surprise even if it springing up just like that kind of was- Julien killed someone. Ashlynn? She'd heard of her a couple of times. She sounded like the person who she got into a tumblr argument about on women's day in middle school- in other words, a bitch. Maybe it was because part of her wanted to shift as much blame away from Julien as possible.
Julien was always the odd duck out of her friends, now that she thought about it. Camilla wondered if she was the same for him.
Declyn asked a question. Her head turned to him, even though he was done talking.
Drugs. In hindsight, those addled moments at the party felt like the highlight of her life.
She let out a tired laugh.
"Yeah," she answered, wondering if Declyn remembered she'd stated as much to him that night. "Remember switfball?"
So she couldn't protect Drew. Maybe that was never on the table for her. Maybe it could be forgiven. But if she couldn't protect Declyn and Theo either?
What kind of excuse for a friend would she be then?
When morning came, she kept listening to the announcements. A nasty surprise awaited her but it wasn't really a surprise even if it springing up just like that kind of was- Julien killed someone. Ashlynn? She'd heard of her a couple of times. She sounded like the person who she got into a tumblr argument about on women's day in middle school- in other words, a bitch. Maybe it was because part of her wanted to shift as much blame away from Julien as possible.
Julien was always the odd duck out of her friends, now that she thought about it. Camilla wondered if she was the same for him.
Declyn asked a question. Her head turned to him, even though he was done talking.
Drugs. In hindsight, those addled moments at the party felt like the highlight of her life.
She let out a tired laugh.
"Yeah," she answered, wondering if Declyn remembered she'd stated as much to him that night. "Remember switfball?"
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
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Jan de Witt
- Posts: 97
- Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2019 2:19 pm
Theo watched fearfully as they approached each other, just waiting for the moment when Declyn's patience finally ran out or some nearby murderer finally noticed them. But nothing of the sort happened; Declyn muttered, Camilla watched, and nothing more came of it. As Theo made his way over to them, the tension simply disappeared; there was nothing more anyone was willing to say. Finally, silence returned, and he soon found himself nodding off to a relatively peaceful sleep.
-----
He slept deeply for the rest of the night, and when he woke up the noise and tension of the previous night had been replaced by a peaceful, perhaps even companionable silence. This time, however, Theo was actually listening out for someone. In the end though, all he received was a bland, meaningless confirmation of what had actually happened, with an added malice, maybe, but no real hint to anything else.
Eventually, Declyn asked whether he had done drugs before. Theo smiled slightly at that; it had always been a point of pride for him that, in spite of the social costs of his isolation, he was at least safe from any of the dangerous but popular trends that were so often core to social life. Of course, it would probably be fair to say that such benefits had been rendered meaningless, yet the pride remained. "Not really, no. Why do you ask?", he replied lightly.
-----
He slept deeply for the rest of the night, and when he woke up the noise and tension of the previous night had been replaced by a peaceful, perhaps even companionable silence. This time, however, Theo was actually listening out for someone. In the end though, all he received was a bland, meaningless confirmation of what had actually happened, with an added malice, maybe, but no real hint to anything else.
Eventually, Declyn asked whether he had done drugs before. Theo smiled slightly at that; it had always been a point of pride for him that, in spite of the social costs of his isolation, he was at least safe from any of the dangerous but popular trends that were so often core to social life. Of course, it would probably be fair to say that such benefits had been rendered meaningless, yet the pride remained. "Not really, no. Why do you ask?", he replied lightly.
Declyn’s eyes popped to life at Camilla’s reply and he couldn’t help but chuckle in amusement. A small pop that his body very much appreciated when he straightened his back for a moment.
“Yesss...!” he stretched the word, emphasizing the s while he tapped the bottle. Swiftball had had a lot of highlights and incidents people kept talking about the days after and further. Fond memories he kept close to his heart, Cecil’s one the closest. Stargazing with Morgan and Regina, when the sky seemed in reach and colorful, but he was sure the light string that was attached outside had altered the picture in his head. That was fine. Getting drunk. Dancing with Drew, watching the others have fun.
“Man, it was such a good night.” He nudged her foot with his own. “I loved your message so much. It was so cute.” He had replied with an I love you too back then which still stood. Declyn nudged Theo’s foot too at his response. It was nice to see him smile again before that.
“Aw, I wondered what kind of drunk or high texter you would be,” he said. “No, I don’t know, I’m talking about the hard stuff. And how… or, just, the different reactions to it.” He shook the bottle when he said that. “This is what’s left from the house we stayed in. Well, Amelia took a bottle and Lori has probably more than that. It was crazy,” he added.
"So if anyone's thirsty this might not be the best option."
“Yesss...!” he stretched the word, emphasizing the s while he tapped the bottle. Swiftball had had a lot of highlights and incidents people kept talking about the days after and further. Fond memories he kept close to his heart, Cecil’s one the closest. Stargazing with Morgan and Regina, when the sky seemed in reach and colorful, but he was sure the light string that was attached outside had altered the picture in his head. That was fine. Getting drunk. Dancing with Drew, watching the others have fun.
“Man, it was such a good night.” He nudged her foot with his own. “I loved your message so much. It was so cute.” He had replied with an I love you too back then which still stood. Declyn nudged Theo’s foot too at his response. It was nice to see him smile again before that.
“Aw, I wondered what kind of drunk or high texter you would be,” he said. “No, I don’t know, I’m talking about the hard stuff. And how… or, just, the different reactions to it.” He shook the bottle when he said that. “This is what’s left from the house we stayed in. Well, Amelia took a bottle and Lori has probably more than that. It was crazy,” he added.
"So if anyone's thirsty this might not be the best option."
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 682
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: The Zone™
Camilla was kind of thirsty, but she was being very careful with her water. Her smile remained, as Declyn spoke.
At least she knew she was loved.
Out of idle curiosity, she asked "What kind of drugs?"
She didn't know many details about this sort of thing- what drugs were soluble in water? That was kind of a scary thought, there being drugs in her water and not being able to tell. Wasn't that the basis of a bunch of conspiracy theories?
Her eyes glanced up at the sky- it made her eyelids feel a little heavier. The sun and risen and set.
But it didn't shine.
At least she knew she was loved.
Out of idle curiosity, she asked "What kind of drugs?"
She didn't know many details about this sort of thing- what drugs were soluble in water? That was kind of a scary thought, there being drugs in her water and not being able to tell. Wasn't that the basis of a bunch of conspiracy theories?
Her eyes glanced up at the sky- it made her eyelids feel a little heavier. The sun and risen and set.
But it didn't shine.
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
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Jan de Witt
- Posts: 97
- Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2019 2:19 pm
Theo listened patiently as Declyn continued his story; he hadn't attended Swiftball himself, of course, but even now he still kept Camilla's final message to the all in mind; it wasn't the best message he had ever received from her, certainly, but it was certainly the most heartfelt. But his next comment reminded Theo of the practical questions that always lay in the background. Glancing skeptically at Declyn, he waved towards the lake. "Do you think the lake water's drinkable? Maybe if we really ran out of safe water, we could try drinking from there."
The day rolled on, as the previous days had done. The announcements came, and Theo waited for Drew's death to be announced, before he belatedly realized that it had probably happened late enough to be missed. The rest of the day was spent watching the lake and the sky, pausing only to take a small bite out of a loaf of bread or sip a little water when necessary. As he watched the clouds roll by, he tried to think about the last day's events from a more detached point of view. Sure, the announcements had stated who killed who, but given the lack of context, surely it was still possible that some of them might be accidental? When the time came, would he really learn anything more? His thoughts reminded him of Diego.
The more he considered it, the more he realized that he was remiss not to have pressed the point more strongly. Now, if any, was the time to to do something, anything, before anything horrible came to pass. Speaking more firmly now, he stood up. "We need to get Diego. We were too late for Drew, maybe, but we can't just give up now."
He shook slightly. "Please. I don't want to leave any of us alone."
The day rolled on, as the previous days had done. The announcements came, and Theo waited for Drew's death to be announced, before he belatedly realized that it had probably happened late enough to be missed. The rest of the day was spent watching the lake and the sky, pausing only to take a small bite out of a loaf of bread or sip a little water when necessary. As he watched the clouds roll by, he tried to think about the last day's events from a more detached point of view. Sure, the announcements had stated who killed who, but given the lack of context, surely it was still possible that some of them might be accidental? When the time came, would he really learn anything more? His thoughts reminded him of Diego.
The more he considered it, the more he realized that he was remiss not to have pressed the point more strongly. Now, if any, was the time to to do something, anything, before anything horrible came to pass. Speaking more firmly now, he stood up. "We need to get Diego. We were too late for Drew, maybe, but we can't just give up now."
He shook slightly. "Please. I don't want to leave any of us alone."
“I don’t know actually,” he responded to Camilla, twisting the bottle between his hands in a way that made the rays of the late dark sun glint through it. “Some form of hallucinogen. You know, the ones that make you… see things that are not actually there? Distort your reality. I think it’s that kind of spooky drug.”
Problem was you never knew how it would end up being. It could be all like Hello, Hell, and oh let me grab all these pieces of the same ever-changing puzzle and mix it up for you to spice in it, dear friend. Are you dreaming? Are you awake? Where are we? What if we’re all crazy? Damn you. Actually nevermind, everything is diamonds and cookies and beautiful including you, sweet cupcake.
Sometimes you didn’t even need drugs for a mild version of this experience and somehow, he was thankful.
Declyn spent the next couple of hours testing the three plants he had previously collected for edibility and, following Theo’s question from before, looking deeper into the lake water.
A lot of it was just that: staring at the lake while allowing himself to distract himself in a veil of nameless nothing. Juuuust a little bit, every now and then. What was left at the end was one plant, very rich in green tones and shades, some peachy yellow colour around the outer edge. He had dared to bite a chunk out of it and eat it some time earlier and it didn’t make his stomach cramps worse so that was an achievement! A rather personal one.
“There are a lot of parts we haven’t explored yet. And you're right.” Theo sounded more confident. Staying in one place for too long made him feel anxious. Declyn tucked the plant into his pocket while rubbing the other that he was going to discard, applying more strength (fairly unaware) at the mention of Drew’s name. A glance at Camilla while he brushed his palm against his pants.
“So, then....” He said quickly and held his own hand, smiling weakly. And yet it radiated hope.
“Time for another hike.”
[Declyn Grayson-Anthis continued in I Don't Wanna Be Myself]
Problem was you never knew how it would end up being. It could be all like Hello, Hell, and oh let me grab all these pieces of the same ever-changing puzzle and mix it up for you to spice in it, dear friend. Are you dreaming? Are you awake? Where are we? What if we’re all crazy? Damn you. Actually nevermind, everything is diamonds and cookies and beautiful including you, sweet cupcake.
Sometimes you didn’t even need drugs for a mild version of this experience and somehow, he was thankful.
Declyn spent the next couple of hours testing the three plants he had previously collected for edibility and, following Theo’s question from before, looking deeper into the lake water.
A lot of it was just that: staring at the lake while allowing himself to distract himself in a veil of nameless nothing. Juuuust a little bit, every now and then. What was left at the end was one plant, very rich in green tones and shades, some peachy yellow colour around the outer edge. He had dared to bite a chunk out of it and eat it some time earlier and it didn’t make his stomach cramps worse so that was an achievement! A rather personal one.
“There are a lot of parts we haven’t explored yet. And you're right.” Theo sounded more confident. Staying in one place for too long made him feel anxious. Declyn tucked the plant into his pocket while rubbing the other that he was going to discard, applying more strength (fairly unaware) at the mention of Drew’s name. A glance at Camilla while he brushed his palm against his pants.
“So, then....” He said quickly and held his own hand, smiling weakly. And yet it radiated hope.
“Time for another hike.”
[Declyn Grayson-Anthis continued in I Don't Wanna Be Myself]
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BlizzardeyeWonder
- Posts: 682
- Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2018 3:41 pm
- Location: The Zone™
Some sort of hallucinogen, hm? Put in you into a waking dream, or nightmare. Then again, they already were in a waking nightmare. Drinking whatever was in that bottle couldn't possibly make it worse, right?
Not like she was brave enough to try.
At least something she knew came in useful here. Foraging likely wouldn't keep them alive on its own, but then again, what would? It was a bleak way of thinking, but she couldn't shake it off. Not wholly. At least she could focus on living right now- at least she could try. But the future- or lack thereof- was still lingering in the back of her mind.
Waiting to pounce on every thought and smile.
Theo, he had to be thinking of the future too, wasn't he? And he was right. He was doing something productive with those thoughts, unlike Camilla. It wasn't like the position of club president mattered anymore- not that really ever did, everybody was an equal here, right?- but she couldn't help but wonder why she got it anyway.
Camilla was too late for Drew. They all were.
But there was a glimmer of hope.
"Another hike it is," she affirmed, reaching down for her bag. Before she picked it up though, she opened it up, and opened up the first aid kit. Inside, right where she put it for "safekeeping" or something, was the necklace with the flower pendant on it. The memory of soft music and gentle laughter accompanied the sight of it, entirely too untarnished for its surroundings. It always was- when she had worn it, it stuck out like a sore thumb on someone like her.
Camilla felt almost guilty for still relishing the memories.
She took it out of the box, and in her pocket instead, placing the first aid kit back in the bag and finally actually slinging it over her shoulder.
And she started walking.
She won't be too late for Diego, she told herself. Even in her mind, it was barely above a whisper.
She couldn't be.
[Camilla Bell continued in I Don't Wanna Be Myself]
Not like she was brave enough to try.
At least something she knew came in useful here. Foraging likely wouldn't keep them alive on its own, but then again, what would? It was a bleak way of thinking, but she couldn't shake it off. Not wholly. At least she could focus on living right now- at least she could try. But the future- or lack thereof- was still lingering in the back of her mind.
Waiting to pounce on every thought and smile.
Theo, he had to be thinking of the future too, wasn't he? And he was right. He was doing something productive with those thoughts, unlike Camilla. It wasn't like the position of club president mattered anymore- not that really ever did, everybody was an equal here, right?- but she couldn't help but wonder why she got it anyway.
Camilla was too late for Drew. They all were.
But there was a glimmer of hope.
"Another hike it is," she affirmed, reaching down for her bag. Before she picked it up though, she opened it up, and opened up the first aid kit. Inside, right where she put it for "safekeeping" or something, was the necklace with the flower pendant on it. The memory of soft music and gentle laughter accompanied the sight of it, entirely too untarnished for its surroundings. It always was- when she had worn it, it stuck out like a sore thumb on someone like her.
Camilla felt almost guilty for still relishing the memories.
She took it out of the box, and in her pocket instead, placing the first aid kit back in the bag and finally actually slinging it over her shoulder.
And she started walking.
She won't be too late for Diego, she told herself. Even in her mind, it was barely above a whisper.
She couldn't be.
[Camilla Bell continued in I Don't Wanna Be Myself]
"No sun to rise would be okay with me... Everyday, every day is okay"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
"A voice in her head, a voice in her head, screaming all the words that were left unsaid"
-
Jan de Witt
- Posts: 97
- Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2019 2:19 pm
Theo watched them cautiously, watching for any signs of dismissal or displeasure, but there were none: there was skepticism in their agreements, but they seemed to be sincere anyways. He found himself relieved, if not wholly reassured. He sat more comfortably, wondering vaguely if he should help the others with whatever they were doing, but in the end the temptation of keeping to himself won out.
He said nothing but nodded gratefully when Declyn suggested they depart, and he smiled at Camilla as she too, prepared to leave. A dim hope grew; it was, to be honest, unfounded, but the sight of the others agreeing seemed to portend good things. When he finally got up, he followed them more confidently than before.
(Theophilus "Theo" Walterson continued in I Don't Wanna Be Myself)
He said nothing but nodded gratefully when Declyn suggested they depart, and he smiled at Camilla as she too, prepared to leave. A dim hope grew; it was, to be honest, unfounded, but the sight of the others agreeing seemed to portend good things. When he finally got up, he followed them more confidently than before.
(Theophilus "Theo" Walterson continued in I Don't Wanna Be Myself)