The Fourth Round

[Fenrir]

Akeno held on to the harpoon until Ivan pulled the body away from her, wanting to hold on to it a little longer just in case Sergio made another last second surge or had anything else up his sleeve. It slipped from her fingers as the body fell backwards and her hand hung in the air, outstretched for a moment longer before it dropped to her side.

Ivan moved to check the corpse and Akeno turned away from the sight, moving with a lot less urgency than her teammate did as she shuffled a few steps away and lent her back against a wooden post at the edge of the jetty. Sergio was already dead, she was certain of that; she’d still been looking into his eyes as she stabbed him. She’d watched the life bleed out of them.

She sighed.

Her hand moved up to her face, swiping away more blood from under her nose before placing a finger and thumb on either side of the bridge and pinching it. It hurt, which was expected, and she heard it crunch, which was a problem. Akeno hissed and let go of her broken nose. Nothing she could do about that, except try and find a mirror later and make sure it was straight at least. She could ignore the pain in she had to, so long as she didn’t get hit in the face again.

Something that used to be white was pushed towards her face and Akeno looked up to see Ivan holding something out to her; a rag or a soiled piece of clothing. She waved him away with her bloodied glove. “I’m fine.” Her voice sounded different, muffled, like she had a stuffed nose and a cold. “I’ll wash it off once we’re back on the cruise ship.”

Blood circling down the drain, cleaning the red off of her hands like she’d done after Maxine. She glanced at Sergio, what used to be Sergio, before looking away to stare at wooden planks.

“Let’s go.”

ES10: AKENO KUDO CONTINUED IN Alligator Arms

[The Honeless Beard]

Ivan nodded, gesturing with his chin for her to take the lead. He'd space out at any point, and it wasn't good to be leading them when he was just as likely to tip over into the ocean as put one foot in front of the other.

He shrugged tenga up over his shoulder and heard a soft pop, and something thumped against his back. Frowning, he shifted the shotgun - tossing the once white cloth towards the ocean - as he pulled tenga from his shoulder and inspected her. He snapped the barrels back closed, only to find them levering back open immediately.

Rolling his eyes, he pulled his (Rhonda's) pack off of his back, rooted around in it to find the manual for tenga. He flipped it open-

[Shiola]

Zabala 10 Gauge Shotgun

This ten gauge double barreled shotgun has been outfitted with a custom grip and 19" barrels. The provided ammunition is 3.5" Magnum 00 Buckshot. Each shell contains 18 .32 lead pellets. That should do it, right? You can’t fuck up with that kind of firepower.

Well, maybe you can.

Instructions:

This shotgun is just super! Twelve Gauges are easy enough to find, but tens have fallen outta fashion in the last couple of years. I did manage to find one, and I turned it into a sawed-off for fun. Because I’m a real man, the kind of person that can actually use something like this worth a damn.

Hang on tight, this thing's a motherfucking demon. Maybe it’s too much gun for you. No, not maybe - it is too much gun for you. What a waste. What a pussy. Who’s actually bothering to watch some brain-damaged, limp-dick manlet fuck up, over and over again? I mean, I guess it’s kinda funny. You should see yourself when you pull the trigger. I freeze-framed it a few times for the boys, watching your face all screwed up like you just shit yourself on a first date. We had a good laugh. You’re good for those.

To load the shotgun, press the tab on the grip all the way to the left, and break the hinge open to reveal the chambers. Make sure the shells are seated all the way in. All the way in there. You’ve got to stick them in all the way. Stick it in her. Stick in tenga. All the way.

Is that simple enough for you, sport? Fuck, I’d be surprised if you grasped the concept of balls-deep. Have you ever, I mean, done it with a real lady? That’s why you gave her a name, isn’t it? It’s a shotgun, dumbass. Though, I guess ten gauge is about three quarters of an inch wide - I’m not saying you should stick your dick in there, I’m just saying you probably could. It’s not like you’re getting much action otherwise.

A shotgun is a close to medium range weapon - the buckshot will spread further apart the greater the distance is to the target. To fire it, point towards your target and squeeze the trigger slowly, while holding the weapon in a firm grip. The shotgun has two triggers, one for each barrel; the front trigger fires the right barrel, and the rear trigger fires the left barrel.

You know what the business end is, right? It’s the end with the holes and the little bead - that’s called a sight, by the way. Don’t try and use the sight, because there’s no stock, and it’s just going to kick up into your face.

Actually, nevermind, try it. A broken nose is the least of your worries right now. The gag reel is looking a little light, so we could definitely use your help there. I’ve gotta say, you’ve been a champ when it’s come to padding out that segment, so far. The producers are always looking for a bit of comic relief here and there. Why do you think I included the harpoon gun? We just knew someone was gonna shoot a fat kid with it! Instant classic.

The safety is located on top of the grip, and is a small switch marked "S" for Selkies, and "F" for Fisk. Ensure that the shotgun is set rearward to "Selkies" when not in use.

Remember to check the barrel for obstructions at every available opportunity. An obstructed barrel can result in an explosion if fired, which can cause serious injury or death. To clean the barrel, open the shotgun and run a small cloth down each bore, making a visual inspection as you do so.

Remember to check the brain for obstructions at every available opportunity. An obstructed brain can result in fuck-ups if left bunged, which can cause serious injury or disappointment, and a sad, sad Emmy. To clean the brain, place the business end (remember, the side with the bead) into your mouth and pull both triggers to clear any obstructions.

Good luck out there, bud. Remember, she's counting on you!

Poor girl.

- Terry McKean, SOTF-TV Armorer

[The Honeless Beard]

-and blinked.

He closed the double barrel firmer this time, and she held together.

Ivan hurried after Akeno.

((Elsewhere))