SOTF Archive/SOTF Classic

It'd come up that morning, loud and clear. The woods were forbidden. A sort of fairy tale ending to their entire situation, the woods that so often had been connective tissue between the island's parts becoming a looming barrier that promised only death to those that entered. What secrets were locked away from the world in its branches now that there was no one to observe them? If left a thousand years in these conditions what stop stories would be told by the resulting population to explain their lack of trespass? Would crossing the treeline be tantamount to crossing into another world, one where living and dead, truth and myth, stop were arbitrary in their distinction? Consider further: was there an easier path to immortality than legend, and was there a simpler path to legend but to go stop where others dare not? Was there anywhere that the fragile human spirit recoiled from further than death? So did it not stand to reason then that the surest way to live forever was to venture where one would certainly stop die?

It made an uncertain amount of sense so long as it was not uttered out loud. Give a reason for action and the world will jump to pick it apart. State nothing and stop the masses will jump to insert themselves with reasons as abundant as they were nonsensical. The burden of argument became theirs, though. Offer nothing and they will stop project their causes onto your own in masturbatory efforts to damn, to redeem, to assist, to inhibit, to reframe, to stop satisfy whatever interpretation they already wanted to hear. So with eyes set in the fastest path towards oblivion Blaise could determine they stopped hobbled in wordless pilgrimage. No words. No gestures. They had done nothing. They had been nothing. That was the message sent. No one would take anything further from their image. They must stop vanish in hollow enigma, because that was all they were, a series of random impulses and events conflicting in motivation, in method, in response, in memory, in any measurable meaningful sense from which one could stop draw meaning despite all rational objection to this state as a mode of being, as if crafted in spite to forces unobservable even to themself.

Stop.

They would send their final message.

Stop.

It would be nothing.

Stop.

Denying closure even to the dead as they took their own life in foolish, irrational, bitter force of hand.

Stop.

Because the trees were only getting closer.

Carl. It's time to stop.

...well it's about time.

It's Tuesday evening. 8 PMish. I don't know why it's important to me to mark the time and be vague about it at the same time, it just feels correct. I want one thing to feel correct in the midst of everything that doesn't and has stopped me from marking the time as Monday, Saturday, August, July, morning, afternoon, midnight, any other time I've sit down to look into an empty box and tell myself it's time. I just want one thing. So it's Tuesday evening. 8 PMish. It won't be when anyone sees this, but it is now. That's right.

I am not bleeding; I'm sick, but my jaw is in place, I have all of my fingers. I haven't killed any of my friends; I haven't seen any of them in months, but none of them have died and I can't imagine it would have been my fault if it did. I'm not on an island; I'm sitting in a basement with family on all sides taking my eyes off the screen for chess games, westerns, world quests, whatever. I'm not walking towards a forest. I'm sitting at a desk putting down these words.

Carl isn't here.

I am not going to say when I turn my head to the empty chair next to my father's movie collection that I can see him there, brim tipped over his eyes, leering grin waiting for me to acknowledge him. I'm not that far into my own bullshit. Carl isn't here. He's an invention. One that's expanded well beyond any restraint I could have imagined for him, though, because like the rib he was grown from he wasn't produced with a plan, at least not one I could commit to with any regularity. So he's not here, not here-here, but every time I've gone to write these words I feel him leaning over my shoulder. Waiting his turn. Offering his demands. It's been too much. Of all the tenants I keep in my head he is the most persistent negotiator; not the best, not the brightest, no nothing like that. The most persistent. The one who cannot understand no.

So I guess the only way to handle it is to finish this here.

What do you want, Carl?

You wanna waste my time with questions you already got answers to, I'm just gonna keep 'em walking.

I'm not asking you for Blaise. Why would I ever ask you for Blaise? Why would I do anything for Blaise? Blaise sucks. Of everything that's made me want to take one between the eyes through this whole process, thinking I might be throwing my lot down on trying to save them has got to be one of the most depressing. Who would ever think that?

Blaise isn't your leverage, Carl.

I know what you said. Character growth. I remember. I wrote it. What I'm asking you is how this gets you there. What's it prove to fight me like this? That's the thing I can't get unless I let you put it down on paper. What do you want, Carl?

You bitch.

There's a start.

You fucked us. Ain't everybody know it? Goin' into this thing half-cocked knowin' full well you don't got shit? You fucked us, down to the last y'all fucked us!

I dunno. I thought I did pretty alright by Nikki.

Ain't it always a joke?

Brother, where do you think you came by it?

And he's not here. Anyone in this room can tell you he's not here. The way my brain processes it though there's this tension in my shoulders that eases off like he's walking away. I can feel him pacing behind me. Ten feet of anger trapped in a five foot container, like anybody hasn't picked up on that yet. I wait. He's been waiting on me weeks. I can wait on him a few minutes.

Y'all just gonna own it then? Ain't got no defense?

Nope. Haven't offered one to anybody else. This whole thing sucks. it was kinda supposed to; if I'm disappointed, it's that it worked too well and kinda sucked the fun out of it. That's why we're staring at this deadline isn't it?

That wasn't always the plan though.

No. Plans never stuck to them real good.

Always their fault, huh?

What, you're defending them now?

I make him see them. I make him see every cruel thing he's done to them. I make him see every cruel thing they've done. I could show everyone else again but I think that's wearing pretty thin and we've got awhile left to go. It's enough for just them.

Why are you upset for them?

Ain't it obvious?

I want you to make it clear.











They're me.

No they aren't.

They're where I...you did it, you get it, I ain't me without them bein' them so the way you made them made me how I am and it ain't right! It ain't right to be...

Unfinished?






Would you like to try and start over?

Name: Blaise d'Aramitz
Gender: Genderfluid
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High
Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, vocal impressions, fashion, gambling

Appearance: Blaise's physical appearance is constantly shifting, but stays centered around their small 5'2", 102 lbs. frame. Their body is petite and lithe, and while they have small developed breasts they usually wear a binder to appear more androgynous. Their hands and feet are small to the point of being childlike, and they have slender fingers with nails kept well manicured at all times.

They are shaved bald but nearly always wear a wig of some sort, though rarely the same one more than a day in a row. Their skin is pale white and always well made up to match the look they are cultivating. They have a sharp, angular face with a Roman nose, blue eyes, and thin lips they generally augment with lip liner and lipstick when they are not alone. Their features are typically contoured softer as well unless they have a distinct purpose for their sharper look.

Blaise's sense of fashion is broad and based largely on how they choose to present that day. They enjoy variety and keep a wide collection of styles in their closets at home in addition to the clothes they designed themself. In addition they keep a wide variety of accessories such as wigs, false facial hair, binders, packers, bras, and make-up to accentuate either masculine or feminine presentation as they choose each day.

Their voice changes even more often than their sense of style. While Blaise typically speaks in a low, androgynous range with a pronounced French accent, they are known to use their abilities of vocal imitation to change on a whim for anything from a single word to an entire day. Years of practice leave them with a wide array of impressions of famous celebrities and characters, generic stock accents, and classmates at George Hunter High.

On the day of the abduction Blaise had been cultivating a take on David Bowie's Thin White Duke. They presented male with a slicked back black wig with red highlights along with a white, button-up dress shirt with its first few buttons undone, a black vest with a pattern of thin, red vertical lines to match their hair and a dark ebony and gold chain hanging across the front pocket, silk black dress pants, and white heels spattered with random splashes of red. They also wore a Blackstar necklace hanging on a silver chain around their neck.

Biography: Blaise was born in Rouen, France, to parents Raphael and Sabine d'Aramitz. Their early childhood wasn't notable; their parents had waited until their careers were somewhat stable to have a child together, and as such lived a fairly comfortable if routine existence.  Raphael was a professor at the nearby University of Rouen, teaching physics and specializing in cosmology. Sabine on the other hand was a moderately successful gender and sexuality therapist who was very well regarded in the local LGBTQ+ community. Blaise wanted for little under their care and while they were both often busy Sabine practiced out of an office in the family home while Raphael made sure to clear some time in his schedule to spend time with their child. Blaise was encouraged to develop autonomy and express their own feelings about every aspect of their life as soon as they were able to communicate. Their parents were by no means push-overs, but they strove to always communicate their expectations and reasoning clearly rather than leaning on parental authority.

Blaise spent a great deal of their early development focusing both on how other people felt and why they would want things, particularly around their growing sense of identity. They began attending preschool at the age of three and encountered gendered stereotypes and expectations for the first time; Sabine had been very firm about keeping their home environment neutral and seeing how Blaise chose to express themself without pressure. Encountering the notion not only that boys and girls were inherently different, but that they were expected to be one or the other was confusing for them. This confusion would only grow as they did. Their mother repeatedly reinforced the idea that their identity was their own, but they found as they grew up they were often anxious about what others might think about them or how they might be judged if they acted outside of those expectations.

While their mother tried to encourage them to focus on their own feelings, she also helped them cope in these years by helping them develop hobbies that took attention off of them and onto a performance. While they tried many activities together, the ones that stuck with Blaise most were magic tricks, drawing, and vocal impressions. Drawing redirected attention away from them entirely; others would focus on and analyze their art rather than them, and it was more excusable to ignore interactions with other people when they were feeling frustrated if they were working on something. Drawing also served as an emotional outlet to explore their early feelings on gender presentation. The admiration of their peers, teachers, and parents motivated them as well.

Magic tricks were an easy way to occupy attention and distract from unwanted questions. Any behavior seen as odd could be turned into part of a greater act, and while others could choose not to believe that excuse it was a difficult one to argue. Admiration motivated Blaise's magic similarly to their drawing, though they soon found it to be less satisfying. People would respond to the same artistic subject with awe many more times than they would the same sort of trick, especially if they learned how it worked. Blaise developed a fascination with mystery through this lack of satisfaction that would spread into other areas of their life, particularly their relationships and gender presentation.

Vocal impressions allowed them to sink into entirely different characters to avoid uncomfortable social situations. When they could not hide in art, or did not have a trick readily at hand to distract, throwing on a silly voice was an easy way to divert the topic. This did not work nearly as well with adults as their other coping mechanisms, but with their classmates it was by far their most successful tactic. Their impressions started very broad, but over the years they worked on mimicking particular characters from popular television shows or people from their life. Sometimes these impressions were hurtful to their subjects, but there was always some audience to appreciate their work.

Pursuing these hobbies made it easier to dissociate the expectations of others. By their preteen years, they began to see outward presentation as a sort of game to manipulate the perspective of the observer to experience what they wanted them to experience. At the time this manipulation was not consciously malicious. They usually did not think of themself as lying to other people or trying to get something out of them, but simply showing whatever part of themself someone wanted to see most. It wasn't any different to please a teacher by presenting the attitude they wanted to see than it was to delight someone with the impression they wanted to hear. It made them happier to be accepted than rejected, and as they weren't sure who they were yet it seemed better for everyone if they presented whatever version of themself would get the best reaction. However there were times when they would present a deliberately false image to someone, usually a classmate as part of an impression or trick that took on a life of its own. This was always done with the intent to reveal the lie afterwards, but it was thrilling in the moment to feel like they had deceived someone so thoroughly. They would fantasize that if they could make people believe they were anyone they would never have to settle on any sort of firm identity, which was comforting.

Blaise's new perspective was able to blossom even further when their parents surprised them at age 11 with news that they were moving to Chattanooga, TN. And from there everything was pretty much fine forever, actually.

Advantages: Blaise has had no significant challenges or events of note since they were a preteen so you can assume it's pretty much smooth sailing from here on.
Disadvantages: Blaise suffers the existential dread of having no clear memories from the age of 11 to 18. Don't worry about it.

---

Think you skipped a few steps there chief.

Establishing a baseline. Don't worry about it. It's right there in the fine print but here you are, worrying about it. That's why you're stuck in the past Carl, we're looking towards the future now. In the past. Let's talk about what you wish I did differently.

You gotta be kiddin' me.

I am not.

What's it matter to you now?

It doesn't. It matters enough for you that we've been having this conversation our way for months now and I don't think it's going to be exorcised until this is finished, so the floor's yours. Where do we start?

...okay.

Reckon I heard some sense a time or two that where it all goes off the rails even without touchin'...all that up there, it's, well it's like you said, there ain't no baseline and this ain't a baseline neither. There's no, well if you wanna call it straight, normal. Everything they're on is some turned to eleven hooey, y'all understand?

Gods. You're not telling me that you want to see...

You asked.

I wanna see Blaise at a bus stop.

Fine.

---

Blaise was at a bus stop.

---

And?

And what? I showed you Blaise at a bus stop. You're the one who thinks this is compelling content. It's not my job to figure it out.

They ain't doin' nothin'.

Bus stops are not known for their gripping action sequences.

They ain't thinkin' nothin'.

Bus stops are not known for their stimulating intellectual meditations.

You know you can do better than this.

I could. It wouldn't be about Blaise though. The one I know does not exist at bus stops. I've tried to explain this i don't know how many times but I can't really be mad at you since your flaws in retention translate to my flaws in creation, yeah? So it's cool.

There's no one to put on that bus stop right now. That's the point. There's a thing I've called Blaise sitting there, but if I were to put the thing we know as Blaise at a bus stop, it wouldn't be a bus stop anymore. Just like when I put the thing we call Blaise in a computer lab, or a theme park, or a park trail, or a beach, or wherever else you want to put them, it stops being those spaces. The spaces and activities Blaise occupies aren't so abnormal. Blaise makes them abnormal. There's no solution here.

So there ain't no point.

I didn't say that.

Then what the fuck did you say?

There's a Blaise who has never been in a bus stop. You don't want to be attached to them. There's a Blaise in a bus stop. You don't particularly care for them either. There's a Blaise who is an unrepentant murderer; you're sickened by them. There's a Blaise who is a listless husk as disgusted as you are; you find them fake. There's a Blaise who never hurt anyone at all, and I suspect you'd find them boring. What I'm saying, Carl, is that there are lots of Blaise's.

Which ones do you want to try on before they die?

We consider the baseline.

---

Name: Blaise d'Aramitz
Gender: Genderfluid
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High
Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, vocal impressions, fashion, gambling

Appearance: Blaise's physical appearance is constantly shifting, but stays centered around their small 5'2", 102 lbs. frame. Their body is petite and lithe, and while they have small developed breasts they usually wear a binder to appear more androgynous. Their hands and feet are small to the point of being childlike, and they have slender fingers with nails kept well manicured at all times.

They are shaved bald but nearly always wear a wig of some sort, though rarely the same one more than a day in a row. Their skin is pale white and always well made up to match the look they are cultivating. They have a sharp, angular face with a Roman nose, blue eyes, and thin lips they generally augment with lip liner and lipstick when they are not alone. Their features are typically contoured softer as well unless they have a distinct purpose for their sharper look.

Blaise's sense of fashion is broad and based largely on how they choose to present that day. They enjoy variety and keep a wide collection of styles in their closets at home in addition to the clothes they designed themself. In addition they keep a wide variety of accessories such as wigs, false facial hair, binders, packers, bras, and make-up to accentuate either masculine or feminine presentation as they choose each day.

Their voice changes even more often than their sense of style. While Blaise typically speaks in a low, androgynous range with a pronounced French accent, they are known to use their abilities of vocal imitation to change on a whim for anything from a single word to an entire day. Years of practice leave them with a wide array of impressions of famous celebrities and characters, generic stock accents, and classmates at George Hunter High.

On the day of the abduction Blaise had been cultivating a take on David Bowie's Thin White Duke. They presented male with a slicked back black wig with red highlights along with a white, button-up dress shirt with its first few buttons undone, a black vest with a pattern of thin, red vertical lines to match their hair and a dark ebony and gold chain hanging across the front pocket, silk black dress pants, and white heels spattered with random splashes of red. They also wore a Blackstar necklace hanging on a silver chain around their neck.

Biography: Blaise was born in Rouen, France, to parents Raphael and Sabine d'Aramitz. Their early childhood wasn't notable; their parents had waited until their careers were somewhat stable to have a child together, and as such lived a fairly comfortable if routine existence. Raphael was a professor at the nearby University of Rouen, teaching physics and specializing in cosmology. Sabine on the other hand was a moderately successful gender and sexuality therapist who was very well regarded in the local LGBTQ+ community. Blaise wanted for little under their care and while they were both often busy Sabine practiced out of an office in the family home while Raphael made sure to clear some time in his schedule to spend time with their child. Blaise was encouraged to develop autonomy and express their own feelings about every aspect of their life as soon as they were able to communicate. Their parents were by no means push-overs, but they strove to always communicate their expectations and reasoning clearly rather than leaning on parental authority.

Blaise spent a great deal of their early development focusing both on how other people felt and why they would want things, particularly around their growing sense of identity. They began attending preschool at the age of three and encountered gendered stereotypes and expectations for the first time; Sabine had been very firm about keeping their home environment neutral and seeing how Blaise chose to express themself without pressure. Encountering the notion not only that boys and girls were inherently different, but that they were expected to be one or the other was confusing for them. This confusion would only grow as they did. Their mother repeatedly reinforced the idea that their identity was their own, but they found as they grew up they were often anxious about what others might think about them or how they might be judged if they acted outside of those expectations.

While their mother tried to encourage them to focus on their own feelings, she also helped them cope in these years by helping them develop hobbies that took attention off of them and onto a performance. While they tried many activities together, the ones that stuck with Blaise most were magic tricks, drawing, and vocal impressions. Drawing redirected attention away from them entirely; others would focus on and analyze their art rather than them, and it was more excusable to ignore interactions with other people when they were feeling frustrated if they were working on something. Drawing also served as an emotional outlet to explore their early feelings on gender presentation. The admiration of their peers, teachers, and parents motivated them as well.

Magic tricks were an easy way to occupy attention and distract from unwanted questions. Any behavior seen as odd could be turned into part of a greater act, and while others could choose not to believe that excuse it was a difficult one to argue. Admiration motivated Blaise's magic similarly to their drawing, though they soon found it to be less satisfying. People would respond to the same artistic subject with awe many more times than they would the same sort of trick, especially if they learned how it worked. Blaise developed a fascination with mystery through this lack of satisfaction that would spread into other areas of their life, particularly their relationships and gender presentation.

Vocal impressions allowed them to sink into entirely different characters to avoid uncomfortable social situations. When they could not hide in art, or did not have a trick readily at hand to distract, throwing on a silly voice was an easy way to divert the topic. This did not work nearly as well with adults as their other coping mechanisms, but with their classmates it was by far their most successful tactic. Their impressions started very broad, but over the years they worked on mimicking particular characters from popular television shows or people from their life. Sometimes these impressions were hurtful to their subjects, but there was always some audience to appreciate their work.

Pursuing these hobbies made it easier to dissociate the expectations of others. By their preteen years, they began to see outward presentation as a sort of game to manipulate the perspective of the observer to experience what they wanted them to experience. At the time this manipulation was not consciously malicious. They usually did not think of themself as lying to other people or trying to get something out of them, but simply showing whatever part of themself someone wanted to see most. It wasn't any different to please a teacher by presenting the attitude they wanted to see than it was to delight someone with the impression they wanted to hear. It made them happier to be accepted than rejected, and as they weren't sure who they were yet it seemed better for everyone if they presented whatever version of themself would get the best reaction. However there were times when they would present a deliberately false image to someone, usually a classmate as part of an impression or trick that took on a life of its own. This was always done with the intent to reveal the lie afterwards, but it was thrilling in the moment to feel like they had deceived someone so thoroughly. They would fantasize that if they could make people believe they were anyone they would never have to settle on any sort of firm identity, which was comforting.

Blaise's new perspective was able to blossom even further when their parents surprised them at age 11 with news that they were moving to Chattanooga, TN. And from there everything was pretty much fine forever, actually.

Advantages: Blaise has had no significant challenges or events of note since they were a preteen so you can assume it's pretty much smooth sailing from here on.
Disadvantages: Blaise suffers the existential dread of having no clear memories from the age of 11 to 18. Don't worry about it.

---

I’m sitting at the desk. It’s quiet. Too early for anyone else to be around. Without real people to pull my attention it’s easier to imagine him there with his hands clasped over the corner where my mousepad runs over the edge. He’s staring at the screen with me. I don’t have to close my eyes to feel it. He’s ready.

Where do you want to go from here?

You askin’ me to take the pen?

I’m asking you who you want to see next. Then I’m asking you to bring them here. I’m asking you to try and show them to me.

I get up from the desk and gesture to my chair.

I’m telling you to take the pen.

Show me what’s missing.

If y’all insist.

---

Name: Blake d'Aramitz
Gender: Male
Age: 18th
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High
Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, vocal impressions, gymnastics, track and field, sports statistics.

Appearance: Blake’s physical appearance stays centered around their small 5'2", 102 lbs. frame. Their body is petite and lithe, and while they have small developed breasts they always wear a binder to appear more masculine. Their hands and feet are small to the point of being childlike, though physical activity has left them callused.

They keep their naturally blonde hair in a faded undercut. Their skin is pale in the winters but tanned all over whenever the weather allows.. They have a sharp, angular face with a Roman nose, blue eyes, and thin lips they generally augment with lip liner and lipstick when they are not alone. Their features are typically contoured harsher, and they maintain a thin pale goatee.

Blake don’t give a shit about fashion.


On the day of the abduction Blake was wearing some blue jeans and a hoodie cuz he don’t feel the need to show off like that.

Biography: Blake was born in Rouen, France, to parents Raphael and Sabine d'Aramitz. Their early childhood wasn't notable; their parents had waited until their careers were somewhat stable to have a child together, and as such lived a fairly comfortable if routine existence. Raphael was a professor at the nearby University of Rouen, teaching physics and specializing in cosmology. Sabine on the other hand was a moderately successful gender and sexuality therapist who was very well regarded in the local LGBTQ+ community. Blake wanted for little under their care and while they were both often busy Sabine practiced out of an office in the family home while Raphael made sure to clear some time in his schedule to spend time with their child. Blake was encouraged to develop autonomy and express their own feelings about every aspect of their life as soon as they were able to communicate. Their parents were by no means push-overs, but they strove to always communicate their expectations and reasoning clearly rather than leaning on parental authority.

Blake spent a great deal of their early development focusing both on how other people felt and why they would want things, particularly around their growing sense of identity. They began attending preschool at the age of three and encountered gendered stereotypes and expectations for the first time; Sabine had been very firm about keeping their home environment neutral and seeing how Blaise chose to express themself without pressure. Encountering the notion not only that boys and girls were inherently different, but that they were expected to be one or the other was confusing for them. This confusion would only grow as they did. Their mother repeatedly reinforced the idea that their identity was their own, but they found as they grew up they were often anxious about what others might think about them or how they might be judged if they acted outside of those expectations.

While their mother tried to encourage them to focus on their own feelings, she also helped them cope in these years by helping them develop hobbies that took attention off of them and onto a performance. While they tried many activities together, the ones that stuck with Blake most were magic tricks, drawing, and vocal impressions. Drawing redirected attention away from them entirely; others would focus on and analyze their art rather than them, and it was more excusable to ignore interactions with other people when they were feeling frustrated if they were working on something. Drawing also served as an emotional outlet to explore their early feelings on gender presentation. The admiration of their peers, teachers, and parents motivated them as well.

Magic tricks were an easy way to occupy attention and distract from unwanted questions. Any behavior seen as odd could be turned into part of a greater act, and while others could choose not to believe that excuse it was a difficult one to argue. Admiration motivated Blake’s magic similarly to their drawing, though they soon found it to be less satisfying. People would respond to the same artistic subject with awe many more times than they would the same sort of trick, especially if they learned how it worked. Blake developed a fascination with mystery through this lack of satisfaction that would spread into other areas of their life, particularly their relationships and gender presentation.

Vocal impressions allowed them to sink into entirely different characters to avoid uncomfortable social situations. When they could not hide in art, or did not have a trick readily at hand to distract, throwing on a silly voice was an easy way to divert the topic. This did not work nearly as well with adults as their other coping mechanisms, but with their classmates it was by far their most successful tactic. Their impressions started very broad, but over the years they worked on mimicking particular characters from popular television shows or people from their life. Sometimes these impressions were hurtful to their subjects, but there was always some audience to appreciate their work.

Pursuing these hobbies made it easier to dissociate the expectations of others. By their preteen years, they began to see outward presentation as a sort of game to manipulate the perspective of the observer to experience what they wanted them to experience. At the time this manipulation was not consciously malicious. They usually did not think of themself as lying to other people or trying to get something out of them, but simply showing whatever part of themself someone wanted to see most. It wasn't any different to please a teacher by presenting the attitude they wanted to see than it was to delight someone with the impression they wanted to hear. It made them happier to be accepted than rejected, and as they weren't sure who they were yet it seemed better for everyone if they presented whatever version of themself would get the best reaction. However there were times when they would present a deliberately false image to someone, usually a classmate as part of an impression or trick that took on a life of its own. This was always done with the intent to reveal the lie afterwards, but it was thrilling in the moment to feel like they had deceived someone so thoroughly. They would fantasize that if they could make people believe they were anyone they would never have to settle on any sort of firm identity, which was comforting.

Blake’s new perspective was able to blossom even further when their parents surprised them at age 11 with news that they were moving to Chattanooga, TN. Blake saw the opportunity for a total reinvention. The tricks they’d used to distract people were fine as hobbies but the move gave them a second shot to define who they were, and they chose to explore an entirely different direction by throwing themself into physical activity. They ramped up from daily walks around their new neighborhood to thrice weekly gym visits with their mother to exploring competitive sports in their new school system.

First came gymnastics in middle school. Blake found they were flexible with an excellent sense of balance and dexterity as well as control of their limbs due to practice with sleight of hand. The feats they could pull of inspired great reactions from their classmates and whether they came from admiration or jealousy they were even more satisfying than all their attempts at deception prior. It felt more concrete to be judged by their accomplishments than by things they made up for no purpose.

Along with gymnastics Blake became interested in track and field, particularly the 200m sprint. It was through track and field that Blake first met their long term best friend, Dante Valerio, who would be a motivating influence in teaching Blake the importance of teamwork as a source of self-improvement. Dante helped Blake be more social in ways that weren’t predicated on comparing themself to others and helped them develop a more natural friend group. While Blake continued to practice their impressions and sleight of hand magic the satisfaction was starting to stem less from fooling other people and more from the delight of others when their performances landed well.

Blake went into high school feeling much better adjusted than they had when they first moved to Chattanooga, though this brought its own difficulties. Blake had avoided the issue of their gender identity for many years at this point, being not entirely comfortable with identifying as a girl but also not sure where else to lean in presentation. Their new friend group and interests centered them on a variety of masculine mentor figures, though, as they found themself gravitating more towards male friends than female friends due viewing the latter more directly as competition to be bested. In their freshman year of high school Blake began to by Blake rather than their birth name of Blaise, and their clothing choices faced out nearly all traditionally feminine options in favor of androgynous or masculine fashion choices. Blake did not explicitly ask for a shift in pronouns at this time or present themself as transgender, but they began to experiment with masculine presentation to see how comfortable they were with it. Their parents were supportive, as were their closest friends.

At present Blake is a decent student, maintaining a B average with much of their high school focus being on competitive sports. Until the spring semester of their senior year they were a respected member of both the track and gymnastics teams, though they have chosen to quit both teams due to pursuing hormone replacement therapy at the end of the fall semester. This has been unavoidably noticed by classmates and faculty, but Blake does not consider themself “out” in any formal sense as they’re still trying figuring the specifics of their gender out. They maintain good physical condition and hope to attend a college that will allow them to complete regardless of hormones, with aspirations as high as some day making the Olympic team. Blake remains close with many of their classmates, in no small part thanks to the support of Dante and his boyfriend Aurelien. Blake considers them the most important people in their life despite struggling with jealousy towards their relationship; Blake has not felt comfortable enough to have a serious relationship for the duration of high school and struggles with the notion that they ever will. They are trying to remain optimistic about their future, though, and use the lessons they’ve learned about letting others motivate them in positive ways to propel them to greater understanding of themself.

Advantages: Blake is physically very fit for their build. They are quick on their feet and capable of closing short distances at a much greater speed than most of their classmates. They are flexible and skilled in gymnastics, so they may be able to reach terrain that others cannot. Their small size allows them to hide in places that may be overlooked. Blake has built a large network of acquaintances including many loyal, similarly athletic friends that may be willing to protect them if they find themself in danger.
Disadvantages: Blake can be impulsive and doesn’t like to think things through; they may run off at the first sign of trouble without any plan about where they’re running to or why. Blake is likely to get themself into trouble if one of their friends is dragged into a bad situation. Blake can also be overconfident and could try to bluff or impress their way through situations over their head.

---

And it’s already written before I understand the context it was written for, like he was ready to show me before he knew he could. We’re in the chair together, his hands within mine guiding the words out. We separate. Carl keeps the chair. I lean to his left side rubbing my chin.

Whatcha thinkin’?

I’m thinking we don’t normally do freebies. If you’re expecting the whole rundown you better wait for a queue.

I smirk at him. He doesn’t flinch.

But I can give you some general impressions. More detail on that back half is the big thing, more connections. I don’t get the sense of Blake being overconfident, I don’t really understand the relationships you’re describing, and it looks like you forgot to include a whole-ass interest there.

Son of a...

You missed at least one Blaise too. You get one for free: Bio, paragraph 2, sentence 2, after the semicolon.

Maybe I meant to, for art or whatever.

Don’t get cute. Just show me the sample.

He knows what I mean without explanation.

---

”Easy now.”

The voice came shaky. Kinda breathless. It didn’t carry the kind of authority you’d maybe hope for trying to get somebody to put down a gun. In their defense this wasn’t a situation they’d covered in their vocal exercises.

((B066- Blake d'Aramitz))

Most people, when made aware of the presence of a crazed gunman, would probably run the other way or at the very least keep their mouths shut if they weren’t already on the firing range. Blake wasn’t going to paint himself as some action hero badass who transcended into that percent of a percent of abnormal reactions through iron will and/or abs of steel; now on the other hand, he wasn’t going to say he couldn’t take on a crazy girl with a gun if he had to, but that wasn’t why he’d climbed his way up the rickety pier to try and get her from behind. When Violet flinched to point the gun at him his hands were already up in a nice wide stance, no threats here, because Blake’s reason for inserting himself into the situation was much, much stupider than believing he could help.

Dante was his dude. If Violet was pointing the gun at Blake, she wasn’t pointing it at him, and that seemed like a trade up before he was staring down the barrel himself. Little details like, say, what if she shoots me? What if she shoots me then shoots him anyway? What if she shoots us then shoots us again for good measure? None of that factored into his plan before he put it in motion, and he was starting to regret that now. So he swallowed and waved those hands in the air a little. “Nobody here wants to hurt you, girl,” he said through a forced smile, “I’m quick but I don’t think I’m quicker than a bullet. And Dante? I mean, you could pop my guy in the skull and he’d probably fade out figuring you had some kind of reason for it.”

---

I don’t laugh. It’s weird to laugh at your own bits and I don’t know that this one is any good. Carl’s staring at me. Fingers have gone still on the keys. I’m always here. I’m out picking up dinner but I’m still here. I’m interpreting at work but I’m still here. I’m at lunch with my brother but I’m still here. I’m lying in bed but I’m still here. We never move. Hours slip to days slip to weeks without progress but I’m still here, I blow past one deadline and then another but I’m still here, I make hard decisions under duress but I’m still here until

I nod.

That’s all I give.

That’s all he needs.

Words highlight blue. The page goes blank.

We know we need to do it again.

We consider the baseline.

---

Name: Blaise d'Aramitz
Gender: Genderfluid
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High
Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, vocal impressions, fashion, gambling

Appearance: Blaise's physical appearance is constantly shifting, but stays centered around their small 5'2", 102 lbs. frame. Their body is petite and lithe, and while they have small developed breasts they usually wear a binder to appear more androgynous. Their hands and feet are small to the point of being childlike, and they have slender fingers with nails kept well manicured at all times.

They are shaved bald but nearly always wear a wig of some sort, though rarely the same one more than a day in a row. Their skin is pale white and always well made up to match the look they are cultivating. They have a sharp, angular face with a Roman nose, blue eyes, and thin lips they generally augment with lip liner and lipstick when they are not alone. Their features are typically contoured softer as well unless they have a distinct purpose for their sharper look.

Blaise's sense of fashion is broad and based largely on how they choose to present that day. They enjoy variety and keep a wide collection of styles in their closets at home in addition to the clothes they designed themself. In addition they keep a wide variety of accessories such as wigs, false facial hair, binders, packers, bras, and make-up to accentuate either masculine or feminine presentation as they choose each day.

Their voice changes even more often than their sense of style. While Blaise typically speaks in a low, androgynous range with a pronounced French accent, they are known to use their abilities of vocal imitation to change on a whim for anything from a single word to an entire day. Years of practice leave them with a wide array of impressions of famous celebrities and characters, generic stock accents, and classmates at George Hunter High.

On the day of the abduction Blaise had been cultivating a take on David Bowie's Thin White Duke. They presented male with a slicked back black wig with red highlights along with a white, button-up dress shirt with its first few buttons undone, a black vest with a pattern of thin, red vertical lines to match their hair and a dark ebony and gold chain hanging across the front pocket, silk black dress pants, and white heels spattered with random splashes of red. They also wore a Blackstar necklace hanging on a silver chain around their neck.

Biography: Blaise was born in Rouen, France, to parents Raphael and Sabine d'Aramitz. Their early childhood wasn't notable; their parents had waited until their careers were somewhat stable to have a child together, and as such lived a fairly comfortable if routine existence. Raphael was a professor at the nearby University of Rouen, teaching physics and specializing in cosmology. Sabine on the other hand was a moderately successful gender and sexuality therapist who was very well regarded in the local LGBTQ+ community. Blaise wanted for little under their care and while they were both often busy Sabine practiced out of an office in the family home while Raphael made sure to clear some time in his schedule to spend time with their child. Blaise was encouraged to develop autonomy and express their own feelings about every aspect of their life as soon as they were able to communicate. Their parents were by no means push-overs, but they strove to always communicate their expectations and reasoning clearly rather than leaning on parental authority.

Blaise spent a great deal of their early development focusing both on how other people felt and why they would want things, particularly around their growing sense of identity. They began attending preschool at the age of three and encountered gendered stereotypes and expectations for the first time; Sabine had been very firm about keeping their home environment neutral and seeing how Blaise chose to express themself without pressure. Encountering the notion not only that boys and girls were inherently different, but that they were expected to be one or the other was confusing for them. This confusion would only grow as they did. Their mother repeatedly reinforced the idea that their identity was their own, but they found as they grew up they were often anxious about what others might think about them or how they might be judged if they acted outside of those expectations.

While their mother tried to encourage them to focus on their own feelings, she also helped them cope in these years by helping them develop hobbies that took attention off of them and onto a performance. While they tried many activities together, the ones that stuck with Blaise most were magic tricks, drawing, and vocal impressions. Drawing redirected attention away from them entirely; others would focus on and analyze their art rather than them, and it was more excusable to ignore interactions with other people when they were feeling frustrated if they were working on something. Drawing also served as an emotional outlet to explore their early feelings on gender presentation. The admiration of their peers, teachers, and parents motivated them as well.

Magic tricks were an easy way to occupy attention and distract from unwanted questions. Any behavior seen as odd could be turned into part of a greater act, and while others could choose not to believe that excuse it was a difficult one to argue. Admiration motivated Blaise's magic similarly to their drawing, though they soon found it to be less satisfying. People would respond to the same artistic subject with awe many more times than they would the same sort of trick, especially if they learned how it worked. Blaise developed a fascination with mystery through this lack of satisfaction that would spread into other areas of their life, particularly their relationships and gender presentation.

Vocal impressions allowed them to sink into entirely different characters to avoid uncomfortable social situations. When they could not hide in art, or did not have a trick readily at hand to distract, throwing on a silly voice was an easy way to divert the topic. This did not work nearly as well with adults as their other coping mechanisms, but with their classmates it was by far their most successful tactic. Their impressions started very broad, but over the years they worked on mimicking particular characters from popular television shows or people from their life. Sometimes these impressions were hurtful to their subjects, but there was always some audience to appreciate their work.

Pursuing these hobbies made it easier to dissociate the expectations of others. By their preteen years, they began to see outward presentation as a sort of game to manipulate the perspective of the observer to experience what they wanted them to experience. At the time this manipulation was not consciously malicious. They usually did not think of themself as lying to other people or trying to get something out of them, but simply showing whatever part of themself someone wanted to see most. It wasn't any different to please a teacher by presenting the attitude they wanted to see than it was to delight someone with the impression they wanted to hear. It made them happier to be accepted than rejected, and as they weren't sure who they were yet it seemed better for everyone if they presented whatever version of themself would get the best reaction. However there were times when they would present a deliberately false image to someone, usually a classmate as part of an impression or trick that took on a life of its own. This was always done with the intent to reveal the lie afterwards, but it was thrilling in the moment to feel like they had deceived someone so thoroughly. They would fantasize that if they could make people believe they were anyone they would never have to settle on any sort of firm identity, which was comforting.

Blaise's new perspective was able to blossom even further when their parents surprised them at age 11 with news that they were moving to Chattanooga, TN. And from there everything was pretty much fine forever, actually.

Advantages: Blaise has had no significant challenges or events of note since they were a preteen so you can assume it's pretty much smooth sailing from here on.
Disadvantages: Blaise suffers the existential dread of having no clear memories from the age of 11 to 18. Don't worry about it.

---

I’m ready to talk again.

What were you looking for in Blake?

I figured Blake was, how’d y’all call it, anchored? Had somethin’ to focus on, somethin’ firm and physical to build on, workin’ with his-

You did it again.

Did what again?

His. I was wondering if you noticed you’d changed it part way through.

He looks at me.

Felt right.

I look at him.

Did ‘they’ feel wrong?

Why do you care?

Our tone has become adversarial again. I feel like we’re digging at a feeling he isn’t ready to expand on, and it’s not my place to force him. Not all answers are deserved.

I point him to the baseline.

Show me another.

---

Name: Barbara “Babs” d'Aramitz
Gender: Genderfluid
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High
Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, linguistics, geography

Appearance: Barbara’s physical appearance is constantly shifting, but stays centered around their small 5'2", 102 lbs. frame. Their body is petite and lithe, and while they have small developed breasts they usually wear a binder to appear more androgynous. Their hands and feet are small to the point of being childlike, and they have slender fingers with nails kept well manicured at all times.

They have straight black hair they tend to style minimally, letting it lay across their shoulders or occasionally tying it into a ponytail.Their skin is pale white and always well made up to match the look they are cultivating. They have a sharp, angular face with a Roman nose, blue eyes, and thin lips. They have prominent freckles as well as acne they leave uncovered by make up, preferring their natural appearance to cosmetics.

Barbara’s sense of fashion is shapeless, preferring baggy outfits that show little skin and present as andrognously as they can. Outside of special occasions they prefer neutral or dull colors and do not accessorize; their sense of style is geared towards making them as unremarkable as possible.

Their voice is often difficult to make out. Barbara rarely raises their volume over whispering. When they can be understood their voice is in the higher register and does not hesitate or stutter as might be expected from their soft presentation..

On the day of the abduction Barbara was wearing a plain white sundress with matching leggings, black jacket with white faux-fur trim, a cream colored floppy wide-brimmed hat, and gray flats.

Biography: Barbara was born in Rouen, France, to parents Raphael and Sabine d'Aramitz. Their early childhood wasn't notable; their parents had waited until their careers were somewhat stable to have a child together, and as such lived a fairly comfortable if routine existence. Raphael was a professor at the nearby University of Rouen, teaching physics and specializing in cosmology. Sabine on the other hand was a moderately successful gender and sexuality therapist who was very well regarded in the local LGBTQ+ community. Barbara wanted for little under their care and while they were both often busy Sabine practiced out of an office in the family home while Raphael made sure to clear some time in his schedule to spend time with their child. Barbara was encouraged to develop autonomy and express their own feelings about every aspect of their life as soon as they were able to communicate. Their parents were by no means push-overs, but they strove to always communicate their expectations and reasoning clearly rather than leaning on parental authority.

Barbara spent a great deal of their early development focusing both on how other people felt and why they would want things, particularly around their growing sense of identity. They began attending preschool at the age of three and encountered gendered stereotypes and expectations for the first time; Sabine had been very firm about keeping their home environment neutral and seeing how Barbara chose to express themself without pressure. Encountering the notion not only that boys and girls were inherently different, but that they were expected to be one or the other was confusing for them. This confusion would only grow as they did. Their mother repeatedly reinforced the idea that their identity was their own, but they found as they grew up they were often anxious about what others might think about them or how they might be judged if they acted outside of those expectations.

While their mother tried to encourage them to focus on their own feelings, she also helped them cope in these years by helping them develop hobbies that took attention off of them and onto a performance. While they tried many activities together, the ones that stuck with Barbara most were magic tricks, drawing, and vocal impressions. Drawing redirected attention away from them entirely; others would focus on and analyze their art rather than them, and it was more excusable to ignore interactions with other people when they were feeling frustrated if they were working on something. Drawing also served as an emotional outlet to explore their early feelings on gender presentation. The admiration of their peers, teachers, and parents motivated them as well.

Magic tricks were an easy way to occupy attention and distract from unwanted questions. Any behavior seen as odd could be turned into part of a greater act, and while others could choose not to believe that excuse it was a difficult one to argue. Admiration motivated Barbara’s magic similarly to their drawing, though they soon found it to be less satisfying. People would respond to the same artistic subject with awe many more times than they would the same sort of trick, especially if they learned how it worked. Barbara developed a fascination with mystery through this lack of satisfaction that would spread into other areas of their life, particularly their relationships and gender presentation.

Vocal impressions allowed them to sink into entirely different characters to avoid uncomfortable social situations. When they could not hide in art, or did not have a trick readily at hand to distract, throwing on a silly voice was an easy way to divert the topic. This did not work nearly as well with adults as their other coping mechanisms, but with their classmates it was by far their most successful tactic. Their impressions started very broad, but over the years they worked on mimicking particular characters from popular television shows or people from their life. Sometimes these impressions were hurtful to their subjects, but there was always some audience to appreciate their work.

Pursuing these hobbies made it easier to dissociate the expectations of others. By their preteen years, they began to see outward presentation as a sort of game to manipulate the perspective of the observer to experience what they wanted them to experience. At the time this manipulation was not consciously malicious. They usually did not think of themself as lying to other people or trying to get something out of them, but simply showing whatever part of themself someone wanted to see most. It wasn't any different to please a teacher by presenting the attitude they wanted to see than it was to delight someone with the impression they wanted to hear. It made them happier to be accepted than rejected, and as they weren't sure who they were yet it seemed better for everyone if they presented whatever version of themself would get the best reaction. However there were times when they would present a deliberately false image to someone, usually a classmate as part of an impression or trick that took on a life of its own. This was always done with the intent to reveal the lie afterwards, but it was thrilling in the moment to feel like they had deceived someone so thoroughly. They would fantasize that if they could make people believe they were anyone they would never have to settle on any sort of firm identity, which was comforting.

Barbara’s new perspective had the potential to blossom even further when their parents surprised them at age 11 with news that they were moving to Chattanooga, TN. A new environment meant new opportunities to invent themself without expectation, but as those opportunities became more real in their first days of middle school they found that uncertainty turning inwards. Barbara had years to measure out their social environment before, and Chattanooga seemed alien by comparison. They could not get a handle on the expectations that had been so simple for them to subvert in Rouen, and more often than not they found themself sinking into the background in group settings. Their attempts to read people became more specialized in redirecting attention from themself or never receiving it in the first place

One consequence of this recontextualization was Barbara becoming more focused on academics. Barbara developed a reputation for turning in consistent work on time without incident that was at times exploited by classmates to perform group tasks or assist in areas where they were having difficulty. Barbara did not mind this so much as doing work for other people was easier than trying to talk to them, though they recognized that their struggles to communicate were posing an increasing challenge. They were isolated from most social groups throughout middle school and had few people they felt comfortable identifying as friends. Attempts to alleviate their struggles with communication led them to a fascination with linguistics as a study of how communication evolves, which they have pursued as a hobby since late middle school.

Going into high school Barbara found they were often homesick for France. Their family visited home multiple times a year but it was not the same as living there, and when they were back on the streets of Rouen they were more confident than when they returned to their adopted home. Throughout high school Barbara researched Rouen, then the surrounding region, then all of France until their curiosity shifted to European culture and geography as a whole. Eventually interest in landmarks and composition eclipsed their homesickness; studying home through books could only imitate the sense of being there, but deepening their studies proved an effective strategy.

Barbara has done little to close the social distance between them and their classmates throughout high school. They have a small number of close friendships and have engaged in a few relationships but still tend to keep others at arm’s length. They prefer to not be seen at all than to navigate social situations and only interact at length with those they feel will not demand much beyond surface acknowledgement. At times their demeanor can be unsettling for those that don’t know what to expect, as they can appear uncaring or dismissive. They have a tendency to disappear from conversations once others are engaged as well as to ghost people they know want to ask them difficult questions. This is not helped by Barbara’s aspiration to return to France for university, perhaps even permanently, which makes putting in the effort to maintain relationships here seem fruitless to them. At present they view the senior trip as a formality to say goodbye to the few people they care to before leaving Chattanooga for the long term.

Advantages: Barbara is adept at avoiding attention. In a tense situation they may be able to turn hostile parties against each other by subtly shifting escalation away from themself and disappear before anyone notices they are gone. They have done their best to not be especially memorable to most of their classmates, which may cause others to overlook them as a potential threat or victim. Blending in comes naturally to them and with their small stature they may be able to find hiding places that are otherwise inaccessible to their classmates.
Disadvantages: Barbara is indecisive and does not like outright confrontation; if caught alone by someone who wants to harm them they have few options to resist. Despite this they are not prone to stay with others and may isolate themself into vulnerability more often than not. Their distant demeanor could lead to violent repercussions with the wrong student.

---

I wonder if he knows that this one is a forgery. His hands stop at the keys so often but when I go to fill in his blanks he stays still. Like he doesn’t recognize or doesn’t care that he needs the assistance; our hands don’t clasp. There is no overlay. His hands vanish and there are only mine, then reverse. The compromise I am hoping for isn’t here.
It is not collaboration.

Only plagiarism.

Still I invite him to show me what I’ve missed.

---

At times it might appear that Barbara was oblivious. Pointed stares. Direct questions. Minimal reactions. Expressed confusion requiring clarification again and again and again. It would not be an unfair conclusion to call them oblivious, no, not unfair at all. Inaccurate, as all things perceived fair usually are, but they did little to challenge it. It was better to be seen as inept; people expected less of them for it, which led to a happier life on their part. There were times, though, that they wished it was not just an inaccurate perception that they chose not to correct. It would be a relief to be as unaware as they were often perceived in tense moments with neither answers or exits readily available to them. It would be so simple if they were simple since taken at face value Megan’s statement was targeted at all of them: "I mean, not that I feel like you're pushing me away, or anything!”

It didn’t have to be targeted at them. You couldn’t push what you wouldn’t allow yourself to touch.

There was a chance that when she’d made her excuses Megan would run away and Barbara wouldn’t have to swallow down guilt much longer...until Zen intervened. Zen, despite opinions to the contrary, was also not oblivious. They had the awareness of the first victim in a horror movie, always absolutely certain that something was wrong without any of the self preservation to run the other direction. Dolly affirmed their clinging endorsement with a detachment Barbara envied and so the final response fell to them. They knew what to do. They were well aware they were expected to smile like there was no discomfort in the air. It was convention to continue the ring of deflection because why would they ever air out their relationship issues here, in public, with an audience, when they had not said so much as a word to Megan since the day they stopped responding to her texts?

“Megan”

A sort of flexing motion with their lips, tension in their teeth. That was Barbara’s attempt at a smile. It was among the many items they were incapable of wearing well.

“How…”

How are you?

How can I explain?

How could you expect this to go well?

How do I tell you I always knew I was leaving when you still don’t?

How was this ever going to turn out differently?

How could you make the mistake of loving me?

“How is prom coming? Any plans?”

Aside from the ones they never answered.

---

It’s all his hands. I understand a little more.

He doesn’t stop.

He considers the baseline.

---

Name: Blaise d'Aramitz
Gender: Genderfluid
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High
Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, vocal impressions, fashion, gambling

Appearance: Blaise's physical appearance is constantly shifting, but stays centered around their small 5'2", 102 lbs. frame. Their body is petite and lithe, and while they have small developed breasts they usually wear a binder to appear more androgynous. Their hands and feet are small to the point of being childlike, and they have slender fingers with nails kept well manicured at all times.

They are shaved bald but nearly always wear a wig of some sort, though rarely the same one more than a day in a row. Their skin is pale white and always well made up to match the look they are cultivating. They have a sharp, angular face with a Roman nose, blue eyes, and thin lips they generally augment with lip liner and lipstick when they are not alone. Their features are typically contoured softer as well unless they have a distinct purpose for their sharper look.

Blaise's sense of fashion is broad and based largely on how they choose to present that day. They enjoy variety and keep a wide collection of styles in their closets at home in addition to the clothes they designed themself. In addition they keep a wide variety of accessories such as wigs, false facial hair, binders, packers, bras, and make-up to accentuate either masculine or feminine presentation as they choose each day.

Their voice changes even more often than their sense of style. While Blaise typically speaks in a low, androgynous range with a pronounced French accent, they are known to use their abilities of vocal imitation to change on a whim for anything from a single word to an entire day. Years of practice leave them with a wide array of impressions of famous celebrities and characters, generic stock accents, and classmates at George Hunter High.

On the day of the abduction Blaise had been cultivating a take on David Bowie's Thin White Duke. They presented male with a slicked back black wig with red highlights along with a white, button-up dress shirt with its first few buttons undone, a black vest with a pattern of thin, red vertical lines to match their hair and a dark ebony and gold chain hanging across the front pocket, silk black dress pants, and white heels spattered with random splashes of red. They also wore a Blackstar necklace hanging on a silver chain around their neck.

Biography: Blaise was born in Rouen, France, to parents Raphael and Sabine d'Aramitz. Their early childhood wasn't notable; their parents had waited until their careers were somewhat stable to have a child together, and as such lived a fairly comfortable if routine existence. Raphael was a professor at the nearby University of Rouen, teaching physics and specializing in cosmology. Sabine on the other hand was a moderately successful gender and sexuality therapist who was very well regarded in the local LGBTQ+ community. Blaise wanted for little under their care and while they were both often busy Sabine practiced out of an office in the family home while Raphael made sure to clear some time in his schedule to spend time with their child. Blaise was encouraged to develop autonomy and express their own feelings about every aspect of their life as soon as they were able to communicate. Their parents were by no means push-overs, but they strove to always communicate their expectations and reasoning clearly rather than leaning on parental authority.

Blaise spent a great deal of their early development focusing both on how other people felt and why they would want things, particularly around their growing sense of identity. They began attending preschool at the age of three and encountered gendered stereotypes and expectations for the first time; Sabine had been very firm about keeping their home environment neutral and seeing how Blaise chose to express themself without pressure. Encountering the notion not only that boys and girls were inherently different, but that they were expected to be one or the other was confusing for them. This confusion would only grow as they did. Their mother repeatedly reinforced the idea that their identity was their own, but they found as they grew up they were often anxious about what others might think about them or how they might be judged if they acted outside of those expectations.

While their mother tried to encourage them to focus on their own feelings, she also helped them cope in these years by helping them develop hobbies that took attention off of them and onto a performance. While they tried many activities together, the ones that stuck with Blaise most were magic tricks, drawing, and vocal impressions. Drawing redirected attention away from them entirely; others would focus on and analyze their art rather than them, and it was more excusable to ignore interactions with other people when they were feeling frustrated if they were working on something. Drawing also served as an emotional outlet to explore their early feelings on gender presentation. The admiration of their peers, teachers, and parents motivated them as well.

Magic tricks were an easy way to occupy attention and distract from unwanted questions. Any behavior seen as odd could be turned into part of a greater act, and while others could choose not to believe that excuse it was a difficult one to argue. Admiration motivated Blaise's magic similarly to their drawing, though they soon found it to be less satisfying. People would respond to the same artistic subject with awe many more times than they would the same sort of trick, especially if they learned how it worked. Blaise developed a fascination with mystery through this lack of satisfaction that would spread into other areas of their life, particularly their relationships and gender presentation.

Vocal impressions allowed them to sink into entirely different characters to avoid uncomfortable social situations. When they could not hide in art, or did not have a trick readily at hand to distract, throwing on a silly voice was an easy way to divert the topic. This did not work nearly as well with adults as their other coping mechanisms, but with their classmates it was by far their most successful tactic. Their impressions started very broad, but over the years they worked on mimicking particular characters from popular television shows or people from their life. Sometimes these impressions were hurtful to their subjects, but there was always some audience to appreciate their work.

Pursuing these hobbies made it easier to dissociate the expectations of others. By their preteen years, they began to see outward presentation as a sort of game to manipulate the perspective of the observer to experience what they wanted them to experience. At the time this manipulation was not consciously malicious. They usually did not think of themself as lying to other people or trying to get something out of them, but simply showing whatever part of themself someone wanted to see most. It wasn't any different to please a teacher by presenting the attitude they wanted to see than it was to delight someone with the impression they wanted to hear. It made them happier to be accepted than rejected, and as they weren't sure who they were yet it seemed better for everyone if they presented whatever version of themself would get the best reaction. However there were times when they would present a deliberately false image to someone, usually a classmate as part of an impression or trick that took on a life of its own. This was always done with the intent to reveal the lie afterwards, but it was thrilling in the moment to feel like they had deceived someone so thoroughly. They would fantasize that if they could make people believe they were anyone they would never have to settle on any sort of firm identity, which was comforting.

Blaise's new perspective was able to blossom even further when their parents surprised them at age 11 with news that they were moving to Chattanooga, TN. And from there everything was pretty much fine forever, actually.

Advantages: Blaise has had no significant challenges or events of note since they were a preteen so you can assume it's pretty much smooth sailing from here on.
Disadvantages: Blaise suffers the existential dread of having no clear memories from the age of 11 to 18. Don't worry about it.

---

I am no longer allowed to be a part of this process. He says nothing to me. His hands speak in overlapped blurs. Only the occasional line is intelligible to me.

Name: Babette d'Aramitz

Name: Laurence d'Aramitz

Name: Michael d'Aramitz

Name: Raphael d'Aramitz

Name: Marie d'Aramitz

Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, scuba diving, interpretive dance

Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, cubism, art history

Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, dog shows, hair dressing

Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, carpentry, grilling

Hobbies and Interests: Drawing, sleight of hand magic, fly fishing, catfishing

love their baby sister as if they were blood

aligned themself with a growing anti-substance abuse movement in the student body

following an incident involving the school pool and no less than five live mackerel

killed an unnamed pedestrian in an accident in the early morning, forever altering their perception of their father’s character

got really into crystals during the quarantine, whatever that means

And so they were laughing. “Another shot?” Dante was a lightweight but it helped his anxiety. They shared whiskey where they could not share concern. Aurelien would be back soon enough to

burned, burned like a motherfucker, under all the blood there was so much that was never meant to be seen but all he could focus on was absence in the center of his hand, the sheer fucking nothing where there was supposed to be, be, something, shit, he was wobbling, he was

a triumphant kind of moan, one that few had managed to pull from the honestly and fewer still without mechanical assistance but after days of nothing but nightmares closing in from every side it felt good to damn caution entirely and remind themself that under everything they’d lost the island was incapable of taking away that all too familiar surge of

”You malignant backstabbing cunt!” His arms hooked through theirs to hold them back and it should have been enough, more than enough, easier than holding up a toddler, yet they strained at his grip like it might break any second. “That was all we had and you toss it over a cliff?” Damned, that was the word for it, she may not have so much as caressed a trigger but her morals had condemned them to certain fates one and

surprised at how easy it felt to die. The pain had grown and grown until it was unbearable but now with their head in her lap it felt almost peaceful. Dimmer, dimmer, each puff the light at the end of their lips got softer, the sun got a little weaker, perhaps they even would have sworn that the blue in their lover’s hair was fading to black. “Was it worth it? To be…” Blaise tried to smile with a wave over their body. Their hand barely flinched. “Like this?”

She did not smile back at them. “No.”

She kept caressing their head.

“I would do it again though.”

---

I can’t interpret it all. Not a fraction, not a fraction of a fraction, the transition from mind to English is too hostile. He spins like this through reality after reality searching for what he needs to show me most until

He's overwhelmed.

He understands.

He still hates me. I feel it. Before I can comprehend anything else he's feeling I process that hatred and I understand that it is deserved. It was never a matter of convincing him to not hate me.

I only wanted him to understand.

It is my hope that he will also understands what I have done while he was working.

What he missed while showing me what I missed.

---

The thing that had once been called Blaise had degraded past the point of being able to feel. It no longer bit back screams trying to wriggle its shattered arm into position. Its jaw hanging out of socket felt no more out of place than a loose necklace. Blood dripping from unrecognizable sources trailed across its skin without note. The very idea of hunger was incomprehensible. In one idle thought, when it still had thoughts, the thing that had once been called Blaise considered themself beyond the notion of want; the view of what they had become, then, was best scene through the curling finger of a monkey's paw granting them that aspiration as more than boast for no eyes but their own.

The thing that used to be called Blaise wanted for nothing.

It felt nothing.

Not until compulsion dragged it off the temple floor.

Those first stumbling steps into daylight were met with primal resistance. An urge to drop to dead weight as the most active opposition it could manage. It did not want to go anywhere; to move, to go, to want was to feel and to hurt and to fail and it was tired in a sense it could only be when the alien will that seemed to crawl down from its spine and spread fingers through its limbs reminded it that it could be tired at all. Some distant echo of higher function had a purpose. The thing that used to be Blaise in the thing that used to be called Blaise urged gesture as statement with vague importance given to trees that were nowhere to be seen. The thing that used to be called Blaise had no use for trees. It did not desire to make or understand statements, for it did not desire at all beyond the need to return to stillness. Yet as the meat that used to be called Blaise protested against its own movement it continued.

They would send their final message.

It would be nothing.

Denying closure even to the dead as they took their own life in foolish, irrational, bitter force of hand.

Because the trees were only getting closer.

It stopped.

It stopped in the open air, sun beating on its face.

It stopped on legs burning for release.

It stopped because it was no longer told to go.

It stopped. And it waited.

The sun rose to its peak.

It waited.

Movement bobbed at the edges of its vision.

It waited.

In the distance there was the roar like thunder without rain.

It waited.

The sun declined.

It waited.

The moon watched it.

It waited.

It dropped without feeling that the legs under it could no longer support it. It had not felt one tremor in all their agony in hours.

It waited until fingers crept along its skin again. It waited until motivation came to stir it to its feet. It waited until it was found wanting, broken, incapable of following function as that compulsion that had so thoroughly dominated it before could not find purchase to slip under its skin. It waited until the feeling became desperate. It waited until it felt as if it was being shaken apart in search of a way to motivate it further into the treeline. It waited until the sensation slowed into weak rocking, hands on their shoulders as if checking for awareness in a victim long dead. It waited until all it could feel was disappointment hanging over its face.

After hours of still silence, it sent its final message.

It laughed for anything that was left to hear it.




They would understand why.

---

It is my hope that he will understand.

Carl and I have business elsewhere.