Let it Happen

[ItzToxie]

((Jonathan Gulley continued from 70's Horror Movies lll))

The sun was rising by the time Jon found a place to sleep.

That place being underneath a bridge. Yeah... Smooth Jon... Real Smooth.

He sat down by the lake leading out into the ocean.

Did he really just do that?

He shot someone, he actually did it. Even worse, it was easy. He just pointed, and pulled the trigger. Alessio fell down, probably bled to death.

He did it. It wasn't some hallucination. He wasn't crazy. He wasn't delirious from his head wound. He looked Al right in the eyes and did it. Watched him fall and scream like that one dude at the end of Django Unchained. He aimed... a little bit higher then where that guy got hit, but it was still the same idea.

It wasn't like Alex. He didn't have a reason for it. He couldn't say it was self-defense at that point, Alessio had given up. No, it was an execution. He executed Al.

Was that how everyone else felt when they did it? Nothing? Or did they enjoy it?

No, couldn't have been it. Even Alvaro had knew he did something wrong when he killed Barry. He looked like he had regretted it instantly. He-... Jon would've liked to talked to Alvaro one last time, to just ask. Why? Why Barry?

Why couldn't it have been him?

Oh.

Oh shit... What would Barry think. After what he did, after what he promised.

He let everyone down. There wasn't getting around that. Yet he was the one that lived. After everything, what happened to his friends?

Michael's sins caught up to him, Darius died alone, and Barry... wrong place wrong time.

What about you Jon, how will it end?

Crumpled on the floor, hot gun in head, stupid fucking mask over your face?

Why are you even wearing it? You think it's just going to make everything easier? It's not really you, it's some alter-ego. A week on some shitty island and you've got an imaginary friend that kills people now? Is that it?

Jon was exhausted. He should've gotten to sleep, but he didn't want to see it again. He didn't want to see them.

He didn't want to dream anymore, because every time he did, everything was okay, until something reminded him, then it all fell apart. As much as he wanted some form of relief, he knew the aftermath wasn't worth it. He felt little bits of him being eaten away every time he woke up.

The announcements drawn him from his thoughts.

Two- three things got his attention.

Alba Reyes, the one who promised to help, but left with Brendan had killed. Help. Yeah. Fuck you too. You fucking liar, you did this to me, you and lying little Brendan. Too scared to see a body? Apparently not, you made them so easy, you hypocrites. You liars, you promise-

Isabel Ramirez had died. Multiple people did it. Couldn't have happened to a better person. You're why we don't deserve to go home. I hope that happens again to people like you.

Amanda Tan got the Best Kill Award... That was... he didn't know how to feel about it. He should be happy for her, but... he'd wished she would've let him die. It would have been better that way.

The good news should have outweighed the bad, but that little tidbit of bad news, it opened a lot of personal things for him. One was the realization that he was lied too, it wasn't some sort of onset paranoia. Brendan had lied to him, Alba had lied to him. They left together, they murdered together.

It opened up other realizations as well.

Brendan Harte saved Nancy Kyle.

Brendan Harte left after Jon told him about the plan at the radio tower.

Nancy Kyle was waiting there... She'd already killed two others there, two others that Darius could have told.

Brendan was with Nancy the entire time. That's... that's why he didn't show up anymore after that! He expected her to kill him!

He... he was going crazy. He felt it, he knew it.  Nothing made sense, but that's when it all made the most sense.

Why would Brendan want to help him? He was friends... more than that with someone Brendan hated. Maybe... Maybe that's why Alvaro did what he did to Barry.

Maybe... that was it. Brendan wanted to hurt Jon. It was... systematic. Too coincidental... it was- No. No! That's fucking stupid! It wasn't that! It had to be something else.

Brendan helped Nancy, he murdered Larkin, he murdered Bernadette. Alba was with him, she murdered Kaitlin. Nancy was saved by him... she killed countless.

There it was then...

The idea that made the most sense. Brendan had lost hope, he was afraid of going home. He sabotaged the escape plan, because he was afraid of owning up to his own actions. He was a coward... he wanted to stay here on this island, he didn't want to go back, and he... he didn't care who got in his way.

Brendan... he- it didn't make any sense... None of it did.

It didn't matter though, did it. It was his fault. Jon only wanted to help people, and look what happened to him. He only wanted closure when he realized he couldn't do that, look what happened to him. He wanted...release. Look what happened to him.

It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair that he lost everything, even after giving all he had, and it wasn't fair that Brendan could just- could just piss everything away a-and th-thrive! Like he was enjoying it!

Brendan had taken everything away from him, and all Jon got in return was his cheap ass hoodie!

No more...

Jon was done with this.

Brendan took everything he had, intentional or not. It didn't matter anymore, the details didn't matter. It was all his fault, no amount of atoning would change it!

Brendan had taken everyone he cared about, wasted his time, taken his chances for doing something right, and nearly got him killed.

Jon wouldn't have any more of this shit, he was going to take it all back.

He was going to even the odds.

He didn't want to kill Brendan. He wanted to hurt him. Just like he had been hurt by him.

He wanted everything, he wanted it all. He wanted Brendan to know what he did.

He wanted Brendan to regret.

And regret he will.

(( Jonathan Gulley Continued Elsewhere.))