"Hey, are you alright?"
Juhan's eyebrows knitted as he wondered why Ian would ask him that. He seemed to be worried. Then, he noticed who Ian was looking at.
The first time Bella and Juhan had met on the island, she was crying. And then, Francis died, her best friend ran away, and they almost got caught in a danger zone. Yet here was Bella, smiling, reassuring everyone around her that she was fine, it was just cold, she was perfectly OK.
Sure, it was chilly right now. Sure, it felt like it was November even though this was supposed to be the start of summer. Yet, Juhan just didn't believe her. He wasn't an idiot. Sure, he could be a bit dense sometimes when it came to feelings. But there was always something going on behind that smile. And Juhan understood. There probably wasn't a single person on this island who was still completely fine. They'd all gone through some traumatic experiences, and Juhan got the feeling that there'd be many more before they got off this island.
But what was Juhan supposed to do? He didn't even know what Bella was worrying about. Was she looking for someone? Was she scared about this plan? Was she scared about dying? There were so many possible reasons. Also, was he supposed to bring it up front or just ignore it? No, no, the latter wouldn't do, definitely not. He had to say something.
A promise. On this island, there were never any guarantees. But he'd try his best to make sure that this promise wouldn't be broken.
"Bella, don't worry. No matter what happens, we're always going to be there for each other. I promise."
Sleeper Cell
Private
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VysePresident
- Posts: 166
- Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2018 9:14 am
Ian studied Bella's pale face a moment longer, noted the tightness of her smile, and simply nodded as she finished speaking. "Alright then, if you're sure."
If a raised eyebrow hinted rather strongly at his own skepticism, well, at least his tone had been kept neutral enough. If she was obviously lying, well, everyone had a certain amount of pride, and there was no sense drawing attention to it. It was fairly obvious at this point that there was no immediate reason to be concerned, and the last thing he needed was to risk her doubling down in denial and refusing any help just on principle. Thankfully, there were easier ways to deal with the problem.
"Anyway guys, I was thinking, with the weather looking like it does, it might be a good idea to split up for a while. We'll be more likely to find some people willing to join us, and we'll regroup at the Hotel come morning."
The trick was presenting his next suggestion to Bella as part of the plan, let her feel useful without draining herself more than was necessary. It was a delicate line to walk, but it at least offered her the ability to keep pride intact without being foolish.
"Actually, I think I'm going to go make a sweep of the Hotel now. I figure people aren't likely to hang around outside if they have the choice, and it might even be worth trying to set up base there. Bella, would you mind coming with me, helping me out?"
Okay, that was less subtle than could have been hoped, but hopefully it'd work for everyone.
If a raised eyebrow hinted rather strongly at his own skepticism, well, at least his tone had been kept neutral enough. If she was obviously lying, well, everyone had a certain amount of pride, and there was no sense drawing attention to it. It was fairly obvious at this point that there was no immediate reason to be concerned, and the last thing he needed was to risk her doubling down in denial and refusing any help just on principle. Thankfully, there were easier ways to deal with the problem.
"Anyway guys, I was thinking, with the weather looking like it does, it might be a good idea to split up for a while. We'll be more likely to find some people willing to join us, and we'll regroup at the Hotel come morning."
The trick was presenting his next suggestion to Bella as part of the plan, let her feel useful without draining herself more than was necessary. It was a delicate line to walk, but it at least offered her the ability to keep pride intact without being foolish.
"Actually, I think I'm going to go make a sweep of the Hotel now. I figure people aren't likely to hang around outside if they have the choice, and it might even be worth trying to set up base there. Bella, would you mind coming with me, helping me out?"
Okay, that was less subtle than could have been hoped, but hopefully it'd work for everyone.
Takeshi laughed wryly. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he had the feeling that this was the moment that everything fell apart. Their splitting off was all part of the show, but this had come out of nowhere. It was another show. He found himself thinking of a T.S. Eliot poem he'd read several times, feeling as though he then understood it on a deeper level than he ever had.
This is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a whimper. So this is is what it looks like when hope dies here. This is what it looks like when you admit to yourself that it won't work. That maybe we just all die here. We don't want to say what we're thinking, because we don't want admit it to each other. Maybe if we don't say it out loud everybody else can just keep dreaming. I wonder what Juhan is thinking. Do we all go our separate ways from here? Saves some hard decisions down the road I guess. I don't know if I want to try to find new companions. It feels like I've been on this island forever.
"Are you sure then? We've been traveling together for a while and I've gotten pretty comfortable with these two over the last couple days. I wouldn't want...I don't know what I want anymore."
This is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a whimper. So this is is what it looks like when hope dies here. This is what it looks like when you admit to yourself that it won't work. That maybe we just all die here. We don't want to say what we're thinking, because we don't want admit it to each other. Maybe if we don't say it out loud everybody else can just keep dreaming. I wonder what Juhan is thinking. Do we all go our separate ways from here? Saves some hard decisions down the road I guess. I don't know if I want to try to find new companions. It feels like I've been on this island forever.
"Are you sure then? We've been traveling together for a while and I've gotten pretty comfortable with these two over the last couple days. I wouldn't want...I don't know what I want anymore."
This is an archival account used by staff to port posts belonging to the handler Zabriel. While this handler hasn't been around in quite a while, should they return and wish to take custody of this account and/or its posts, they are welcome to do so by contacting staff.
Bella's eyes widened as Ian spoke, and she nodded gently at his suggestion. Moving sounded like a good idea. She'd always felt less nervous when she was doing something; it took her mind off her worries and fears, like during her swim meets and dance recitals. They were amongst the few times where she didn't feel some level of anxiety or fear, save for the precious moments of time she spent with her Garrett. Her anxieties protested once more, pointing out the myriad of scenarios that might happen once she and Ian had left the others, but she rejected them. Ian was a good person, he just wanted to help her was all. Nothing bad could come of them leaving, she was sure of it. And if it was just the two of them together then maybe she could finally take her pills, finally force the worries that consumed her so much to subside.
She didn't want to leave either Juhan or Takeshi, especially with how long they'd stayed together. But the two of them would be safe without her - doubtless safer than if she were staying with them. And they'd meet up again soon enough, once she'd taken her pills and they were in a safer and more secured position. She could feel her vision begin to blur as Takeshi stated the feeling was mutual, and shifted over to pull him into a tight embrace.
"Me too, Takeshi. But splitting up makes sense, yeah? And besides we'll regroup soon. It'll only be a little while."
She had to keep moving, if she wanted to find her Garrett and take her mind of everything for awhile.
"Sure, Ian. That's a good idea." She offered Juhan and Takeshi a sad smile as she stood up gingerly, dusting sand from her skirt and legs, before picking up her bags and tightly clutching them to her chest. "Takeshi... Juhan... thank you. For everything. You've both been perfect. I couldn't have asked for better friends."
She bit her lip as she moved to join Ian's side, her every movement cautious as she attempted not to slip on the pale sands. Her fears and doubts began to resurface once more as she was suddenly hit with the abruptness of their departure, but she fought them backwards. She had to leave if she wanted to find her Garrett, and if she wanted an opportunity to take her pills without being judged for it,
and if she didn't want to hurt them.
Just a few minutes more, and then everything would be fine.
It had to be.
((Mirabella Strong continued in Blown off Course))
She didn't want to leave either Juhan or Takeshi, especially with how long they'd stayed together. But the two of them would be safe without her - doubtless safer than if she were staying with them. And they'd meet up again soon enough, once she'd taken her pills and they were in a safer and more secured position. She could feel her vision begin to blur as Takeshi stated the feeling was mutual, and shifted over to pull him into a tight embrace.
"Me too, Takeshi. But splitting up makes sense, yeah? And besides we'll regroup soon. It'll only be a little while."
She had to keep moving, if she wanted to find her Garrett and take her mind of everything for awhile.
"Sure, Ian. That's a good idea." She offered Juhan and Takeshi a sad smile as she stood up gingerly, dusting sand from her skirt and legs, before picking up her bags and tightly clutching them to her chest. "Takeshi... Juhan... thank you. For everything. You've both been perfect. I couldn't have asked for better friends."
She bit her lip as she moved to join Ian's side, her every movement cautious as she attempted not to slip on the pale sands. Her fears and doubts began to resurface once more as she was suddenly hit with the abruptness of their departure, but she fought them backwards. She had to leave if she wanted to find her Garrett, and if she wanted an opportunity to take her pills without being judged for it,
and if she didn't want to hurt them.
Just a few minutes more, and then everything would be fine.
It had to be.
((Mirabella Strong continued in Blown off Course))
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VysePresident
- Posts: 166
- Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2018 9:14 am
(Skipping to leave thread, with permission from Mara.)
"I know what you mean." Quiet words and a small, miserable nod for Takeshi.
Ian's resolve wavered briefly at the boy's words. Takeshi was a nice kid, really, the kind of person Ian wished he'd gotten to know better before, and might have if he hadn't been so preoccupied for the last two days. Somehow, he felt guilty, almost like he was abandoning the other two, letting them down, and he didn't know why. He didn't like the thought of hurting either of them, still less that he owed them better, but it made sense, right?
"Just...what Bella said, basically. Time's running out every minute, and it's about talking with as many people as we can. It shouldn't be more than a day tops."
Deep breath, relax.
After all, it was just common sense, right? It was good for the plan, and it gave him an excuse to keep Bella from being a noble idiot until she really did hurt herself. It made sense, right?
Besides, Juhan had the map, he trusted his friend, and they shouldn't need him. He'd still be helping out, and they could take care of things in the meantime just fine. Then he wouldn't need to make all these decisions that had to be perfect, wouldn't need to answer the hard questions...
...On second thought, perhaps he understood his sense of guilt a little better than he cared to admit. Perhaps he'd jumped rather quickly at this...
One last chance to back out.
He thrust his hand out towards Juhan. Maybe it was cowardly, maybe it was just polite, but it didn't feel right to back out now, after he'd already committed.
"Take care, pal. I don't...I mean, well, just be careful okay? You too, Takeshi."
There was more after that, some delay before they actually parted, because none of them really wanted to, but the departure could only be prolonged so long. For a brief while, the walk did indeed do him some good, and it wasn't until much later that the nagging worry returned.
It was just one among many, at first, but then it started taking on shape. A thought here, a detail there, until it suddenly became clear, and he was left trying to grasp the implications of it all.
The rush from the apartments had been panicked, leaving no time, or even thought for plans. There was one thing they needed to escape, something essential to destroying the collars, and in the chaos, he'd simply forgotten it. He couldn't even tell Bella, couldn't turn back and tell the others without alerting the terrorists.
He grew very silent indeed for the rest of the trip.
((Ian Williams continued in: Blown off Course))
((For those wondering, Zabriel and I are also pulling out.))
As it turns out, they wouldn't be there for Juhan.
No, no, it wasn't fair to think of it like that. Not at all. They'd be there for each other, they hadn't broken their promises. It was just part of the plan. After all, all they needed to do was find a few people who wanted to escape just as much they did, and then Ian and Bella would be waiting for them at the hotel and everything would be back to normal. Well, as normal as it got here.
But he couldn't help feeling abandoned. And he couldn't shake off the feeling of it all being so final. It would only be for a day, but from the way everyone spoke, it seemed like it'd be the last time they saw each other.
He couldn't afford to think that.
Juhan had struck the jackpot when he found Bella and, later on, Ian. He didn't have to worry about them getting killed or killing or any of that because they were right next to him, with almost no bruises, still talking and walking like a normal person. He didn't want to let them go because there was always that unfortunate possibility that something bad could happen. Luck had gone their way for this short rest because their collars hadn't blown up and no one had come to threaten them. But it wouldn't stay like that forever. Ian was right. Time was running out, and if Maynard or Garrett or anyone else from school died before they escaped, Juhan couldn't help but feel like it would be on their hands. Sure, they weren't the ones who pulled the trigger. They were trying to save everyone. But if they worked too slow...
He couldn't think of what to say. There was a lot he could've said, honestly. He could've made some big speech about how they'll see each other again, no matter what, and it'd just be like the stories he'd read and written, and the movies he'd watched, where there'd be a single tear falling from their eyes as they walked away into the distance.
But he couldn't get the words out. It was too hard saying goodbye. He was too scared to let them go. But they couldn't do anything else. So, he grasped Ian's hand and shook it firmly. Then, he looked down at the ground and fidgeted for a while. When after a few long seconds, they finally said their goodbyes, Juhan looked up, forced himself to smile and waved slightly at them.
"I'll keep safe. Bye."
He wasn't even sure if they could hear him properly. But it was good enough. Sometimes, it was just better keeping things simple.
Juhan looked at Takeshi and said, "I guess it's just us for now." He paused for a few seconds. "Don't worry. I'm sure they'll come back." It wasn't meant for Takeshi so much as it was meant to reassure Juhan himself. Besides, he couldn't think anything else. They'd see each other again, they would.
As it turns out, they wouldn't be there for Juhan.
No, no, it wasn't fair to think of it like that. Not at all. They'd be there for each other, they hadn't broken their promises. It was just part of the plan. After all, all they needed to do was find a few people who wanted to escape just as much they did, and then Ian and Bella would be waiting for them at the hotel and everything would be back to normal. Well, as normal as it got here.
But he couldn't help feeling abandoned. And he couldn't shake off the feeling of it all being so final. It would only be for a day, but from the way everyone spoke, it seemed like it'd be the last time they saw each other.
He couldn't afford to think that.
Juhan had struck the jackpot when he found Bella and, later on, Ian. He didn't have to worry about them getting killed or killing or any of that because they were right next to him, with almost no bruises, still talking and walking like a normal person. He didn't want to let them go because there was always that unfortunate possibility that something bad could happen. Luck had gone their way for this short rest because their collars hadn't blown up and no one had come to threaten them. But it wouldn't stay like that forever. Ian was right. Time was running out, and if Maynard or Garrett or anyone else from school died before they escaped, Juhan couldn't help but feel like it would be on their hands. Sure, they weren't the ones who pulled the trigger. They were trying to save everyone. But if they worked too slow...
He couldn't think of what to say. There was a lot he could've said, honestly. He could've made some big speech about how they'll see each other again, no matter what, and it'd just be like the stories he'd read and written, and the movies he'd watched, where there'd be a single tear falling from their eyes as they walked away into the distance.
But he couldn't get the words out. It was too hard saying goodbye. He was too scared to let them go. But they couldn't do anything else. So, he grasped Ian's hand and shook it firmly. Then, he looked down at the ground and fidgeted for a while. When after a few long seconds, they finally said their goodbyes, Juhan looked up, forced himself to smile and waved slightly at them.
"I'll keep safe. Bye."
He wasn't even sure if they could hear him properly. But it was good enough. Sometimes, it was just better keeping things simple.
Juhan looked at Takeshi and said, "I guess it's just us for now." He paused for a few seconds. "Don't worry. I'm sure they'll come back." It wasn't meant for Takeshi so much as it was meant to reassure Juhan himself. Besides, he couldn't think anything else. They'd see each other again, they would.
Takeshi tried to push his own doubts out of his mind as he felt Bella's arms around him. He reciprocated and whispered to her, "stay safe Bella. We will find each other again. Whatever else happens, we'll find each other again."
Soon after that Bella and Ian were gone. Takeshi and Juhan were alone. After a long moment Takeshi looked over to Juhan. "You know, maybe it's not too late to go back to the freighter. Neither of us really have anything that intimidating and they have weapons to spare. I wouldn't want to use a weapon on anybody, but having something might help us scare off any players, help anybody friendly we meet feel a little bit safer."
Or you know, just camp there, forget recruiting new people and get out of these damn collars while we've got the chance.
He nodded. "We'll meet them again, and we'll keep taking care of each other. We'll figure this all out."
Soon after that Bella and Ian were gone. Takeshi and Juhan were alone. After a long moment Takeshi looked over to Juhan. "You know, maybe it's not too late to go back to the freighter. Neither of us really have anything that intimidating and they have weapons to spare. I wouldn't want to use a weapon on anybody, but having something might help us scare off any players, help anybody friendly we meet feel a little bit safer."
Or you know, just camp there, forget recruiting new people and get out of these damn collars while we've got the chance.
He nodded. "We'll meet them again, and we'll keep taking care of each other. We'll figure this all out."
This is an archival account used by staff to port posts belonging to the handler Zabriel. While this handler hasn't been around in quite a while, should they return and wish to take custody of this account and/or its posts, they are welcome to do so by contacting staff.
Time was urgent, yes. Every second they stayed on the beach was being wasted. There was nothing preventing them. All their supplies were ready, they had a goal in mind, and there was nothing else left to be said.
It was something that Juhan had fought many times when he tried to write a story, or do a project. He'd have this big ambitious goal in mind. Maybe he had in mind the climax of a story, something unique, thrilling and quite an emotional roller-coaster. Maybe he had a concept that he just had to write on a notepad or type on Microsoft Word because he might lose it. Yet, he'd always find something to put those tasks off. Maybe he'd suddenly have the urge to clean his room. Or maybe he'd search up this song he heard on the radio and didn't quite catch the name of.
Procrastination. That was the word.
And now he was trying to distract himself with this view of the beach, with the sun, even though he's seen this view a billion times already and will probably see it a few more- no, a billion more times. Why? Because nothing was happening here, and he just wished that it would stay like that forever. He was savoring these last few moments before he went out into the open, where things like risk and betrayal and death lurked in the shadows. Juhan wasn't a brave person. Normally, he tried avoiding risk as much as possible. In high school, this meant keeping quiet about someone being a jerk to one of his friends because, even though he should interfere, he didn't want to deal with that someone being mad at him also. But here, risk was stepping out of that beach. Risk was recruiting people while acting like they'd just wait it out or something. Risk was everything. Everything but this part of the beach.
At this point however, staying safe was a stupid choice because it'd lead to nothing but death for Juhan. So, time to get up, to start speaking, and to get out of this beach and start doing something.
"Yeah, we will," he said to Takeshi. "Oh, by the way, I don't think we need to go back. We have everything we need." Pipe bombs and Molotovs were pretty intimidating, to be honest. "Besides, we shouldn't bother them right now. I'm sure we'll find something to use while travelling." A lousy excuse, but going to the beach was really risky considering what was about to go down there. He was pretty sure Gavin wouldn't appreciate them asking for weapons right when they're about to shoot the collars.
"You know, I think we should go now. I'm pretty well rested now, and there's nothing else to do here." With that, Juhan looked at the caves one last time as he left the beach, knees starting to shake from anxiety. The next steps they took would be crucial, and he couldn't afford to screw up. But he could do it. He could make it today. He still had Takeshi with him, and he'd meet up with Ian and Bella tomorrow, hopefully with a few more companions. All they needed was a little trust and faith.
(Juhan Levandi continues in Tell No Tales)
It was something that Juhan had fought many times when he tried to write a story, or do a project. He'd have this big ambitious goal in mind. Maybe he had in mind the climax of a story, something unique, thrilling and quite an emotional roller-coaster. Maybe he had a concept that he just had to write on a notepad or type on Microsoft Word because he might lose it. Yet, he'd always find something to put those tasks off. Maybe he'd suddenly have the urge to clean his room. Or maybe he'd search up this song he heard on the radio and didn't quite catch the name of.
Procrastination. That was the word.
And now he was trying to distract himself with this view of the beach, with the sun, even though he's seen this view a billion times already and will probably see it a few more- no, a billion more times. Why? Because nothing was happening here, and he just wished that it would stay like that forever. He was savoring these last few moments before he went out into the open, where things like risk and betrayal and death lurked in the shadows. Juhan wasn't a brave person. Normally, he tried avoiding risk as much as possible. In high school, this meant keeping quiet about someone being a jerk to one of his friends because, even though he should interfere, he didn't want to deal with that someone being mad at him also. But here, risk was stepping out of that beach. Risk was recruiting people while acting like they'd just wait it out or something. Risk was everything. Everything but this part of the beach.
At this point however, staying safe was a stupid choice because it'd lead to nothing but death for Juhan. So, time to get up, to start speaking, and to get out of this beach and start doing something.
"Yeah, we will," he said to Takeshi. "Oh, by the way, I don't think we need to go back. We have everything we need." Pipe bombs and Molotovs were pretty intimidating, to be honest. "Besides, we shouldn't bother them right now. I'm sure we'll find something to use while travelling." A lousy excuse, but going to the beach was really risky considering what was about to go down there. He was pretty sure Gavin wouldn't appreciate them asking for weapons right when they're about to shoot the collars.
"You know, I think we should go now. I'm pretty well rested now, and there's nothing else to do here." With that, Juhan looked at the caves one last time as he left the beach, knees starting to shake from anxiety. The next steps they took would be crucial, and he couldn't afford to screw up. But he could do it. He could make it today. He still had Takeshi with him, and he'd meet up with Ian and Bella tomorrow, hopefully with a few more companions. All they needed was a little trust and faith.
(Juhan Levandi continues in Tell No Tales)
Takeshi nodded, not entirely sure that Juhan had caught the subtext of what he was saying. It was just as well. Maybe they could save a few more souls, and going back for weapons was just an excuse as far as Takeshi was concerned. He stood and stretched when Juhan mentioned moving out.
"Yeah, that's probably for the best," Takeshi agreed as he followed closely behind Juhan.
((Takeshi Yoshikawa continued in Tell No Tales))
"Yeah, that's probably for the best," Takeshi agreed as he followed closely behind Juhan.
((Takeshi Yoshikawa continued in Tell No Tales))
This is an archival account used by staff to port posts belonging to the handler Zabriel. While this handler hasn't been around in quite a while, should they return and wish to take custody of this account and/or its posts, they are welcome to do so by contacting staff.