((Jennifer Perez continued from A Day Late))
Things at the groundskeeper's hut were not a whole lot better than they were at the hall of mirrors. There were less bodies, but only by a bit. Three of them were outside, in varying states of decay. Jennifer had to remind herself that they were just things now. They weren't in pain. They weren't upset at their predicament. They were just things, things rotting in the sun.
Inside, there was a thing rotting on the bed.
This was what led Jennifer to scale the side of the relatively small building and sit on the roof. The trip up had been a bit nerve wracking. She'd never really been the athletic sort, and a long skirt was really not optimal for mobility's sake, but she'd managed, using a window ledge as a stepping point and eventually hauling herself up with her arms. She'd never done a pull up in her life, but it was amazing how motivated the opportunity to escape the stench of death made her.
Now, she was sitting on the roof, waiting to see if Melissa wanted to follow her up, and just taking a good look at the world from a new vantage point. The greens stretched out to the west. They were peppered with bodies, just like everywhere else. She could see the mountain and the mansion and the sea and the fair, but not the hall of mirrors, hidden as it was behind a ridge. She thought she could see people moving, but it was probably just her imagination. The day was dragging on, the sun going down. Soon it would be dark.
That didn't matter. Night would come when it came. For now, it was just nice to be away from it all, just for a moment, even if the separation amounted to under a dozen feet of elevation.
And A Buck Short
Open, Day 7 early evening
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MurderWeasel
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(Melissa Li continued from A Day Late.)
The sun was beginning to set as the two of them finally arrived at the Groundskeeper's Hut. Things were no better than they were at the Hall of Mirrors, really. No one else to greet them besides the sight of more dead bodies lying out in the open, supposedly free of earthly desires such as living. Melissa didn't know what to do with them. They had been out for a while...it probably was for the best to simply leave them outside. Of course, the fact that there was a body lying on the bed inside of the hut didn't really make things any better.
But at least it was safe at the moment and they weren't in any danger of dying. Jennifer...well, she decided to climb to the roof of the hut. Melissa wasn't sure if she wanted to join...it wasn't that she had a fear of heights...just more of an aversion, she guessed. She never was much of a climber either...always got paranoid that somehow she'd slip and fall and crack her head open or something. But here on the island...well, there were worse things to die from, weren't there? She might as well...talking to Jennifer would have been awkward if she had remained on the ground.
So she copied Jennifer, climbing up after her (although a lot more shaky and unsure) and eventually found herself sitting down next to her friend, staring out at the open land in front of them. It was almost beautiful, in a way...a vast expanse lit by the oranges of the setting sun with soft wind blowing through their hair. One of those Kodak moments, as it were.
Melissa didn't want to say anything. Just wanted to enjoy it in silence. So she kept her mouth shut.
The sun was beginning to set as the two of them finally arrived at the Groundskeeper's Hut. Things were no better than they were at the Hall of Mirrors, really. No one else to greet them besides the sight of more dead bodies lying out in the open, supposedly free of earthly desires such as living. Melissa didn't know what to do with them. They had been out for a while...it probably was for the best to simply leave them outside. Of course, the fact that there was a body lying on the bed inside of the hut didn't really make things any better.
But at least it was safe at the moment and they weren't in any danger of dying. Jennifer...well, she decided to climb to the roof of the hut. Melissa wasn't sure if she wanted to join...it wasn't that she had a fear of heights...just more of an aversion, she guessed. She never was much of a climber either...always got paranoid that somehow she'd slip and fall and crack her head open or something. But here on the island...well, there were worse things to die from, weren't there? She might as well...talking to Jennifer would have been awkward if she had remained on the ground.
So she copied Jennifer, climbing up after her (although a lot more shaky and unsure) and eventually found herself sitting down next to her friend, staring out at the open land in front of them. It was almost beautiful, in a way...a vast expanse lit by the oranges of the setting sun with soft wind blowing through their hair. One of those Kodak moments, as it were.
Melissa didn't want to say anything. Just wanted to enjoy it in silence. So she kept her mouth shut.
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MurderWeasel
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Jennifer and Melissa sat on the roof of the groundskeeper's hut. Jennifer couldn't smell the death up here. She could almost pretend the air was clean again. She could almost pretend that the world was okay. She could find beauty in things. Even in the middle of all this madness, she could find something worth looking at.
The last time she'd stared at the sky, just sat and stared at the stars, she'd been home in Saint Paul, sitting in a park. She'd been out late, and she'd hoped her parents wouldn't be worried. She didn't have to ponder that now, though. Of course they were worried, worried or resigned. Maybe they'd accepted reality just like she had. Surely they knew she wasn't the sort of person who could fight through something like this. She wondered if they were talking again. Maybe this would get them together for a civil conversation, for the first time since the divorce. She tried to pretend she was standing there with them, crying and smiling and hugging them and Monica and Samuel. She wished she could play Tom Sawyer and sit in at her own funeral, see if maybe things were a bit better for her passing.
She blinked away her tears and leaned back, her arms crossed behind her head as a pillow.
Watch the sky.
Last time she'd watched the sky, she'd been interrupted by Dorothy Stoeber.
Dory was one of those annoying popular girls, the sort Jennifer always ended up friends with. Dory was apparently too cool for Senior trips or something. She was back home in Saint Paul.
Jennifer wondered what Dory was doing right this moment. She hoped that Dory was living her life to the fucking fullest, wringing everything possible out of her opportunities, never forgetting for an instant the fate she had barely dodged. She hoped Dory would think of her, maybe, just once. Didn't have to be now. Just someday down the line.
Of course, that was the happy side of her thoughts.
Watch the sky.
Last time she'd watched the sky, she'd been interrupted by Ben Powell.
Ben was that Australian boy, well, one of a few at Bayview. He was nice and funny and smiled. He didn't get along so well with Dory. He'd been friends with Reiko's whole clique. He'd fenced.
Jennifer didn't wonder what Ben was doing. She knew. He was decomposing, bloating and breaking down as bacteria and insects and various scavengers consumed his body. He was about twenty feet out from her, and perhaps a dozen below.
He was just a thing now, maybe.
That wasn't so easy to believe at the moment.
She blinked away her tears, but there were always more.
The wind ruffled her skirt, ran chilly fingers through her hair, which had fallen a bit flat in the past week, what with her not having any time to style it.
She breathed out slowly, just enjoying how it felt to deeply exhale. Breathing was nice. Pity she wouldn't get to do that much more of it.
The last time she'd stared at the sky, just sat and stared at the stars, she'd been home in Saint Paul, sitting in a park. She'd been out late, and she'd hoped her parents wouldn't be worried. She didn't have to ponder that now, though. Of course they were worried, worried or resigned. Maybe they'd accepted reality just like she had. Surely they knew she wasn't the sort of person who could fight through something like this. She wondered if they were talking again. Maybe this would get them together for a civil conversation, for the first time since the divorce. She tried to pretend she was standing there with them, crying and smiling and hugging them and Monica and Samuel. She wished she could play Tom Sawyer and sit in at her own funeral, see if maybe things were a bit better for her passing.
She blinked away her tears and leaned back, her arms crossed behind her head as a pillow.
Watch the sky.
Last time she'd watched the sky, she'd been interrupted by Dorothy Stoeber.
Dory was one of those annoying popular girls, the sort Jennifer always ended up friends with. Dory was apparently too cool for Senior trips or something. She was back home in Saint Paul.
Jennifer wondered what Dory was doing right this moment. She hoped that Dory was living her life to the fucking fullest, wringing everything possible out of her opportunities, never forgetting for an instant the fate she had barely dodged. She hoped Dory would think of her, maybe, just once. Didn't have to be now. Just someday down the line.
Of course, that was the happy side of her thoughts.
Watch the sky.
Last time she'd watched the sky, she'd been interrupted by Ben Powell.
Ben was that Australian boy, well, one of a few at Bayview. He was nice and funny and smiled. He didn't get along so well with Dory. He'd been friends with Reiko's whole clique. He'd fenced.
Jennifer didn't wonder what Ben was doing. She knew. He was decomposing, bloating and breaking down as bacteria and insects and various scavengers consumed his body. He was about twenty feet out from her, and perhaps a dozen below.
He was just a thing now, maybe.
That wasn't so easy to believe at the moment.
She blinked away her tears, but there were always more.
The wind ruffled her skirt, ran chilly fingers through her hair, which had fallen a bit flat in the past week, what with her not having any time to style it.
She breathed out slowly, just enjoying how it felt to deeply exhale. Breathing was nice. Pity she wouldn't get to do that much more of it.
Melissa didn't know how much time they had spent just looking out. Certainly more than enough time that any sane person probably would have told them to get off because they were sitting ducks up there on the roof. But no one interrupted them and Melissa was thankful for the peace they managed to achieve for themselves. Just sitting, watching, waiting...it was a nice change from the hustle that marked her first few days on the island. Of course, the fact that the people they were actually waiting for had yet to show up...well, Melissa wasn't particularly worried about that. They really were only waiting for Nick, after all, and he...well, he knew how to handle himself.
She sighed a bit, picking at the collar of her shirt as she continued to look out on the scenery. "Hey Jen. Before all this, did you have any plans for after high school?"
She didn't know why she was going with this train of thought, but Melissa just decided to run with it. It was better than nothing and...well, she was getting a little bit tired of the silence. She wanted to talk. Maybe it was just because she wanted to hear her own voice or something...she didn't know. It just felt right...to her, at least. She couldn't help but wonder if Jennifer was getting annoyed by her yapping... "I probably would have just gone to college and get some sort of science degree. Become a doctor or a researcher or something prominent like that. Make the parents happy, you know? Maybe even discover a new cure for cancer or something silly like that. Hah, I wouldn't even be able to come up with a name for it. Maybe they'll just call it the Li Cure or something dumb. China Woman in miniature disease-busting form."
"Now though...if somehow, someway, we get rescued? Oddly enough...I'd probably want to be a teacher. I dunno...I like helping people with math and stuff...at least whenever someone asked, I'd always try to help." She continued, taking in a deep breath as she remembered those times back at Bayview. "I think it'd be fun...teaching the next generation of adults. Heh...although maybe I'd be a college professor or something instead. Find someone I liked to be with...maybe marry, I dunno, I never was really good at making plans on my own."
"What about you, Jen? Anything like that?"
She sighed a bit, picking at the collar of her shirt as she continued to look out on the scenery. "Hey Jen. Before all this, did you have any plans for after high school?"
She didn't know why she was going with this train of thought, but Melissa just decided to run with it. It was better than nothing and...well, she was getting a little bit tired of the silence. She wanted to talk. Maybe it was just because she wanted to hear her own voice or something...she didn't know. It just felt right...to her, at least. She couldn't help but wonder if Jennifer was getting annoyed by her yapping... "I probably would have just gone to college and get some sort of science degree. Become a doctor or a researcher or something prominent like that. Make the parents happy, you know? Maybe even discover a new cure for cancer or something silly like that. Hah, I wouldn't even be able to come up with a name for it. Maybe they'll just call it the Li Cure or something dumb. China Woman in miniature disease-busting form."
"Now though...if somehow, someway, we get rescued? Oddly enough...I'd probably want to be a teacher. I dunno...I like helping people with math and stuff...at least whenever someone asked, I'd always try to help." She continued, taking in a deep breath as she remembered those times back at Bayview. "I think it'd be fun...teaching the next generation of adults. Heh...although maybe I'd be a college professor or something instead. Find someone I liked to be with...maybe marry, I dunno, I never was really good at making plans on my own."
"What about you, Jen? Anything like that?"
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MurderWeasel
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Some time later, Melissa provided a highly welcome distraction from the dark thoughts floating in Jennifer's mind, replacing them with questions and plans and fantasies a shade or two lighter. Jennifer was not at all surprised to learn that Melissa had been college-bound and headed into the sciences. Melissa was a smart girl. Kind and caring, too. She had a bright future ahead of her. She really would have been something.
And now, she wanted to be a teacher. It was an odd thought. It was like she wanted to give back, in a way. Like she wanted to help set things right, now that they'd been damaged so badly. It was a different cure, not for cancer, but for the sickness unleashed by SOTF. It was really admirable. It was something for Jennifer to think about, too, or it would have been, if it wasn't pointless pretending she would have a future.
Jennifer sighed.
"I, um, I had some ideas," she said. "I figured I might, um, you know, work for a little while, make some money. Go to, um, community college and then, um, somewhere better. I... wasn't really sure what I wanted to do, honestly. I, um, I always thought I'd either go into fashion or, um, therapy. I like helping people with problems. I, um, I probably wouldn't have been very good at either, though."
The thought had been that self-deprecation would make the loss of potential, the loss of her life, sting less. It wasn't working very well, though.
"I, um, now... Maybe I'd be a school counselor. Maybe, um, maybe back at... at Bayview or something."
Inspiration came from the weirdest places sometimes, but Melissa's words had really taken hold. Jennifer found herself considering the possibilities, and actually liking them. The problem was, that did absolutely nothing to change her fate.
"If, um, if they'd have me, you know. It'd be, um, a little awkward and all that. With, um, all of this."
A brief pause. She stretched her legs a bit.
"You'll be a great teacher, Melissa."
And now, she wanted to be a teacher. It was an odd thought. It was like she wanted to give back, in a way. Like she wanted to help set things right, now that they'd been damaged so badly. It was a different cure, not for cancer, but for the sickness unleashed by SOTF. It was really admirable. It was something for Jennifer to think about, too, or it would have been, if it wasn't pointless pretending she would have a future.
Jennifer sighed.
"I, um, I had some ideas," she said. "I figured I might, um, you know, work for a little while, make some money. Go to, um, community college and then, um, somewhere better. I... wasn't really sure what I wanted to do, honestly. I, um, I always thought I'd either go into fashion or, um, therapy. I like helping people with problems. I, um, I probably wouldn't have been very good at either, though."
The thought had been that self-deprecation would make the loss of potential, the loss of her life, sting less. It wasn't working very well, though.
"I, um, now... Maybe I'd be a school counselor. Maybe, um, maybe back at... at Bayview or something."
Inspiration came from the weirdest places sometimes, but Melissa's words had really taken hold. Jennifer found herself considering the possibilities, and actually liking them. The problem was, that did absolutely nothing to change her fate.
"If, um, if they'd have me, you know. It'd be, um, a little awkward and all that. With, um, all of this."
A brief pause. She stretched her legs a bit.
"You'll be a great teacher, Melissa."
Melissa smiled and nodded as she listened to Jennifer's stuttering aspirations and she let out a snort when she Jennifer mentioned that she wouldn't be too good. The Chinese girl just shook her head and gave Jennifer a challenging smile, giving her a playful shove on the shoulder. "Don't be modest, Jennifer. Saying you wouldn't be good at therapy or in fashion? Don't be silly...remember what I told you at the Cinema? I liked your work...and I meant it then and I still mean it. I mean...even if there's practically little chance of that happening now because I think I lost my wallet somewhere..."
She tried to laugh at her joke, trying to avoid the real reason why that exchange never would really happen. She didn't want to say it, even though the both of them knew it. Still, she felt a heaviness in her heart and the rumble of that annoying voice in her head coming back so she quickly powered on, trying to ignore the feeling. "And as for therapy...don't you remember what you did on this island? You...You're probably the kindest person on the island here. You stayed with Nick Reid even though he was a killer and...and you believed in him. Not everyone can do that, right? So that means...no matter what the person, I'm sure you'll be able to listen to their problems and understand. Isn't that a basic skill that all therapists need?"
Melissa smiled as Jennifer continued and like her, she stated that she'd like to be something different now that they had the experience on the island. Her smile grew as she thought of Jennifer as a school counselor and a light blush graced her cheeks when she heard her friend's compliment. She shook her head ruefully. "I dunno...I doubt I'd be as good as a teacher and you would be a counselor. Who knows? I'm sure we'd try our best though...right? Maybe Bayview would have to give us both Best Teacher Awards, huh?"
She grinned and turned her attention back to the scenery, her grin fading away as she closed her eyes, letting her thoughts just drift away. She was getting tired...maybe her body needed a rest after all that talking...adrenaline and fright weren't driving her at the moment. She was calm and...maybe not at peace, but definitely more content than she had ever been. She yawned, covering her mouth with a hand as she looked at Jennifer. "Hey...now's the perfect time to get some sleep, huh? Let's just alternate watches and we can both get in some shut eye."
And with that, the night passed smoothly and uneventfully. It wasn't a comfortable rest...after all, what rest on a roof is? But it was rest and Melissa smiled as she looked at the scenery that was illuminated by the rising morning sun. She gave the sleeping Jennifer a shake and murmured, "Hey, it's morning...wake up."
She winced as the ever-familiar crackle of the speakers started up and she immediately wished that she hadn't woken up Jennifer. It would have been better for her to sleep through it...but what was done was done. Melissa closed her eyes, breathing softly as she listened to Danya's gloating, sickening voice echo through the air. 'Twenty-nine...Twenty-nine kids killed in one day. Impossible...I can't believe that's even possible. I guess he's just proving more how bloodthirsty humans can be...'
She just hoped that none of her friends were on that list...and had that hope immediately shattered when Nick Reid's name graced the announcements yet again. She quickly looked at Jennifer, hoping that somehow her friend was drowsy enough that the name simply passed by her and she didn't recognize it. Melissa remembered the look on his face as he had ran away from the Logging Road...it wasn't a look that said "I'm going to kill someone else now." Yet there it was...Nick had sent another student to his death and she couldn't even tell if it was because Nick was somehow trying to protect them or just...wanted to notch another mark on his belt. 'Nick...you bastard...why? Does it give you a thrill? Jennifer cared about you...wanted you to be peaceful...not a killer. And yet here you go off, the moment she's not looking you murder someone else. Bastard...!'
Next up was Robert Jenkins and she let out a pained grunt as his name was read out, covering her face with her hands. She coughed, trying to ignore the sharp pain in her heart. She knew he had killed...but either way, he had been...was her friend and now she didn't even know why he had killed in the first place. Now he was just another corpse amongst the fallen. 'One more kill before you died, huh, Rob...? Why...did you do it? Self-defense? Just wanted to pad your count? Dammit, dammit, dammit...'
But Danya wasn't done. As quick as a one-two punch came the news that Sapphire MacLeod had died and Felicia...Felicia Carmichael had killed. Sapphire's death didn't hurt as much as she had expected...Melissa thought she'd feel more for the girl, but then again they didn't really have that much contact. She had known the girl though...had seen her just hours before. That had been enough to wedge the knife in deeper.
What really hurt...what really just felt like a punch in the gut...was the fact that Felicia had killed again. 'Was it the same sort of circumstance? Was she tried to protect herself and others just like in the Infirmary? Please...please tell me that it was. Please don't tell me she had killed out of spite...out of rage, out of despair. I can't...I don't want to accept that.'
Melissa remembered the shock on Felicia's face as she shot Sebastian...remembered the shaking of her hand as the corpse had fallen on her. Felicia hadn't seemed like a girl who would want to continue killing unless necessary and she had faith in her friend that Felicia was just going to keep trucking along. Just...find her way and not become a killer. She wanted to hope so hard. But although she hoped that it was just...a mistake or something that was necessary, in her heart, Melissa couldn't help but feel like there was a chance that Felicia had just...lost it. It was possible that the loss of Aislyn had pushed her over the brink.
No. That was wrong.
That was all wrong. She couldn't doubt Felicia.
She wouldn't doubt Felicia. Until she saw it in front of her eyes, she wouldn't doubt.
She sniffed, trying to stop the tears from falling. She felt so guilty. Guilty for believing, even for a moment, that Felicia could have been a cold-blooded murderer. Guilty for just letting Felicia go where she wanted...for leaving her alone. She choked on her tears, quickly wiping them away and shaking her head. Crying wouldn't help solve anything. She needed to stop that. It was sad, yes, but she didn't need to cry all the time. And besides, it wasn't like she was the only one around...
She shook her her head again and looked at Jennifer, her eyes slightly red and bleary. She raised a hand...paused...and placed it comfortably on Jennifer's shoulder, giving her a few pats. She wanted to say something cheerful...some dumb joke that'll raise their spirits. She still hoped that her friend hadn't heard Nick Reid's name.
But she didn't have anything. She gave her one last pat and...just let her hand fall away.
She looked out at the scenery...the trees, the flowing grass, the dead bodies littering the ground, the warm morning sun at her back and casting her shadow in front of her.
It...was so beautiful.
She tried to laugh at her joke, trying to avoid the real reason why that exchange never would really happen. She didn't want to say it, even though the both of them knew it. Still, she felt a heaviness in her heart and the rumble of that annoying voice in her head coming back so she quickly powered on, trying to ignore the feeling. "And as for therapy...don't you remember what you did on this island? You...You're probably the kindest person on the island here. You stayed with Nick Reid even though he was a killer and...and you believed in him. Not everyone can do that, right? So that means...no matter what the person, I'm sure you'll be able to listen to their problems and understand. Isn't that a basic skill that all therapists need?"
Melissa smiled as Jennifer continued and like her, she stated that she'd like to be something different now that they had the experience on the island. Her smile grew as she thought of Jennifer as a school counselor and a light blush graced her cheeks when she heard her friend's compliment. She shook her head ruefully. "I dunno...I doubt I'd be as good as a teacher and you would be a counselor. Who knows? I'm sure we'd try our best though...right? Maybe Bayview would have to give us both Best Teacher Awards, huh?"
She grinned and turned her attention back to the scenery, her grin fading away as she closed her eyes, letting her thoughts just drift away. She was getting tired...maybe her body needed a rest after all that talking...adrenaline and fright weren't driving her at the moment. She was calm and...maybe not at peace, but definitely more content than she had ever been. She yawned, covering her mouth with a hand as she looked at Jennifer. "Hey...now's the perfect time to get some sleep, huh? Let's just alternate watches and we can both get in some shut eye."
And with that, the night passed smoothly and uneventfully. It wasn't a comfortable rest...after all, what rest on a roof is? But it was rest and Melissa smiled as she looked at the scenery that was illuminated by the rising morning sun. She gave the sleeping Jennifer a shake and murmured, "Hey, it's morning...wake up."
She winced as the ever-familiar crackle of the speakers started up and she immediately wished that she hadn't woken up Jennifer. It would have been better for her to sleep through it...but what was done was done. Melissa closed her eyes, breathing softly as she listened to Danya's gloating, sickening voice echo through the air. 'Twenty-nine...Twenty-nine kids killed in one day. Impossible...I can't believe that's even possible. I guess he's just proving more how bloodthirsty humans can be...'
She just hoped that none of her friends were on that list...and had that hope immediately shattered when Nick Reid's name graced the announcements yet again. She quickly looked at Jennifer, hoping that somehow her friend was drowsy enough that the name simply passed by her and she didn't recognize it. Melissa remembered the look on his face as he had ran away from the Logging Road...it wasn't a look that said "I'm going to kill someone else now." Yet there it was...Nick had sent another student to his death and she couldn't even tell if it was because Nick was somehow trying to protect them or just...wanted to notch another mark on his belt. 'Nick...you bastard...why? Does it give you a thrill? Jennifer cared about you...wanted you to be peaceful...not a killer. And yet here you go off, the moment she's not looking you murder someone else. Bastard...!'
Next up was Robert Jenkins and she let out a pained grunt as his name was read out, covering her face with her hands. She coughed, trying to ignore the sharp pain in her heart. She knew he had killed...but either way, he had been...was her friend and now she didn't even know why he had killed in the first place. Now he was just another corpse amongst the fallen. 'One more kill before you died, huh, Rob...? Why...did you do it? Self-defense? Just wanted to pad your count? Dammit, dammit, dammit...'
But Danya wasn't done. As quick as a one-two punch came the news that Sapphire MacLeod had died and Felicia...Felicia Carmichael had killed. Sapphire's death didn't hurt as much as she had expected...Melissa thought she'd feel more for the girl, but then again they didn't really have that much contact. She had known the girl though...had seen her just hours before. That had been enough to wedge the knife in deeper.
What really hurt...what really just felt like a punch in the gut...was the fact that Felicia had killed again. 'Was it the same sort of circumstance? Was she tried to protect herself and others just like in the Infirmary? Please...please tell me that it was. Please don't tell me she had killed out of spite...out of rage, out of despair. I can't...I don't want to accept that.'
Melissa remembered the shock on Felicia's face as she shot Sebastian...remembered the shaking of her hand as the corpse had fallen on her. Felicia hadn't seemed like a girl who would want to continue killing unless necessary and she had faith in her friend that Felicia was just going to keep trucking along. Just...find her way and not become a killer. She wanted to hope so hard. But although she hoped that it was just...a mistake or something that was necessary, in her heart, Melissa couldn't help but feel like there was a chance that Felicia had just...lost it. It was possible that the loss of Aislyn had pushed her over the brink.
No. That was wrong.
That was all wrong. She couldn't doubt Felicia.
She wouldn't doubt Felicia. Until she saw it in front of her eyes, she wouldn't doubt.
She sniffed, trying to stop the tears from falling. She felt so guilty. Guilty for believing, even for a moment, that Felicia could have been a cold-blooded murderer. Guilty for just letting Felicia go where she wanted...for leaving her alone. She choked on her tears, quickly wiping them away and shaking her head. Crying wouldn't help solve anything. She needed to stop that. It was sad, yes, but she didn't need to cry all the time. And besides, it wasn't like she was the only one around...
She shook her her head again and looked at Jennifer, her eyes slightly red and bleary. She raised a hand...paused...and placed it comfortably on Jennifer's shoulder, giving her a few pats. She wanted to say something cheerful...some dumb joke that'll raise their spirits. She still hoped that her friend hadn't heard Nick Reid's name.
But she didn't have anything. She gave her one last pat and...just let her hand fall away.
She looked out at the scenery...the trees, the flowing grass, the dead bodies littering the ground, the warm morning sun at her back and casting her shadow in front of her.
It...was so beautiful.
This is an archival account used by staff to port posts belonging to the handler Tythanin. While this handler hasn't been around in quite a while, should they return and wish to take custody of this account and/or its posts, they are welcome to do so by contacting staff.
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MurderWeasel
- Posts: 2566
- Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 1:37 am
Melissa proposed they get some sleep, suggesting they trade off watches, and Jennifer instantly agreed. It was a chance to catch some sleep without having to worry about Lombardi stumbling over them and killing them in their sleep. Jennifer hadn't had very much rest since the early days, excepting her earlier time with Melissa. She'd had enough rest at the start to keep her decently strong, at least.
So they took turns. When she was on watch, Jennifer stared out at the blackness and tried to count stars to keep awake. She tried to find the constellations, but was stymied in her efforts by the fact that she'd never learned much more than the Big and Little Dippers. She listened to the sounds of the night, birds and bugs and the occasional discharge of firearms. She tried to imagine where her friends were, the ones who were still alive. She tried to imagine what Nick was doing. Hopefully keeping out of conflict. Maf, too. She wondered if he even knew that she was on the trip. She hadn't been announced yet. That put her in a rapidly-shrinking category. Melissa was in it too, come to think of it. So was Maf. She wondered how many other people had just been lying low, flying under the radar.
She sighed, and squeezed her arms tighter around her knees. It was a bit chilly. She was a little afraid she'd fuck up and roll off the roof. That'd be a terrible way to die. Better suicide than some dumb accident. She remembered a good number of her classmates falling prey to animals and odd circumstances, and wondered how that could be possible. That answer, though, was fairly simple. This was a tremendously stressful situation, the sort of thing that induced extreme paranoia. Everyone was scared, twitchy, malnourished, and poorly-rested. Of course people would make poor decisions, would crack under the pressure and end up in dangerous situations. More than that, things that were simple to deal with in civilization, things like twisted ankles, could prove fatal now.
She sighed, and forced herself to stop thinking until her turn to sleep came around again.
In the morning, she was awakened by Melissa's gentle shaking and calm words. At first, she didn't want to open her eyes and get up. If she kept them closed, she could be anywhere in the world. She could still be happy and safe. In her dreams, nothing could hurt her, at least not in any lasting way.
She couldn't fall back asleep. Not once the announcements came on.
Jennifer sat up straight and listened to them in silence, trying once more to make it nothing more than a stream of names without connotations. It wasn't working. There were just so fucking many of them. And, of course, Nick was there again. She didn't know what to think. She almost felt like she'd known this would happen, like by letting him out of her sight she had unleashed him on the island once again. It was absurd. It was stupid of her to bear the responsibility for his actions. More than that, she knew she wasn't really accepting it. She would never be able to live with having caused the deaths of almost half a dozen people. She was just getting some sort of masochistic kick out of tying herself to an atrocity, and she hated herself for it.
That was just a spiral. She started trying to think about something else. Breathing. She would focus on her breathing, break the automatic cycle with conscious thought, force herself to pay close attention to each breath.
Then someone else was named, either Orpheus Campbell or Robert Jenkins, who had apparently killed each other, and Melissa made a noise and buried her face in her hands. Jennifer didn't know the story there, but she didn't need to. One of the deaths, and maybe the kill as well, had hurt Melissa. Another friend lost to the game.
As the announcements wrapped up, Jennifer paid close attention to the danger zones, not relishing the idea of evacuating the roof in a hurry. They were safe for the moment, though. Melissa was crying, was sniffling and trying to choke back the tears. Jennifer was having more luck keeping her feelings in check. After all, she'd had a lot of time to get used to the idea that someone she cared about was a killer. She'd been hurt about as badly as she could a couple days before, when Melissa had found her, when she'd finally really internalized the reality of her situation.
Melissa put her hand on Jennifer's shoulder and gave her a couple of pats. Therapeutic physical contact. It was one of the few methods of comforting people Jennifer had never really had any luck with. She always worried that she'd be overstepping boundaries and making people uncomfortable, compounding their pain with awkwardness. This wasn't awkward, though. It did make her feel just the littlest bit better.
Melissa stared out at the world, and Jennifer followed her gaze. She could almost imagine she wasn't part of it anymore. From up here, it could all be pretend, be something that happened to other people, that they watched on TV.
It could hurt them, though. It had hurt them, and it would do so again.
"Um," she said to Melissa. "I'm, um... sorry."
I'm sorry your friend died.
I'm sorry you're waiting with me for a killer.
I'm sorry you didn't break your leg on the way to the bus.
So they took turns. When she was on watch, Jennifer stared out at the blackness and tried to count stars to keep awake. She tried to find the constellations, but was stymied in her efforts by the fact that she'd never learned much more than the Big and Little Dippers. She listened to the sounds of the night, birds and bugs and the occasional discharge of firearms. She tried to imagine where her friends were, the ones who were still alive. She tried to imagine what Nick was doing. Hopefully keeping out of conflict. Maf, too. She wondered if he even knew that she was on the trip. She hadn't been announced yet. That put her in a rapidly-shrinking category. Melissa was in it too, come to think of it. So was Maf. She wondered how many other people had just been lying low, flying under the radar.
She sighed, and squeezed her arms tighter around her knees. It was a bit chilly. She was a little afraid she'd fuck up and roll off the roof. That'd be a terrible way to die. Better suicide than some dumb accident. She remembered a good number of her classmates falling prey to animals and odd circumstances, and wondered how that could be possible. That answer, though, was fairly simple. This was a tremendously stressful situation, the sort of thing that induced extreme paranoia. Everyone was scared, twitchy, malnourished, and poorly-rested. Of course people would make poor decisions, would crack under the pressure and end up in dangerous situations. More than that, things that were simple to deal with in civilization, things like twisted ankles, could prove fatal now.
She sighed, and forced herself to stop thinking until her turn to sleep came around again.
In the morning, she was awakened by Melissa's gentle shaking and calm words. At first, she didn't want to open her eyes and get up. If she kept them closed, she could be anywhere in the world. She could still be happy and safe. In her dreams, nothing could hurt her, at least not in any lasting way.
She couldn't fall back asleep. Not once the announcements came on.
Jennifer sat up straight and listened to them in silence, trying once more to make it nothing more than a stream of names without connotations. It wasn't working. There were just so fucking many of them. And, of course, Nick was there again. She didn't know what to think. She almost felt like she'd known this would happen, like by letting him out of her sight she had unleashed him on the island once again. It was absurd. It was stupid of her to bear the responsibility for his actions. More than that, she knew she wasn't really accepting it. She would never be able to live with having caused the deaths of almost half a dozen people. She was just getting some sort of masochistic kick out of tying herself to an atrocity, and she hated herself for it.
That was just a spiral. She started trying to think about something else. Breathing. She would focus on her breathing, break the automatic cycle with conscious thought, force herself to pay close attention to each breath.
Then someone else was named, either Orpheus Campbell or Robert Jenkins, who had apparently killed each other, and Melissa made a noise and buried her face in her hands. Jennifer didn't know the story there, but she didn't need to. One of the deaths, and maybe the kill as well, had hurt Melissa. Another friend lost to the game.
As the announcements wrapped up, Jennifer paid close attention to the danger zones, not relishing the idea of evacuating the roof in a hurry. They were safe for the moment, though. Melissa was crying, was sniffling and trying to choke back the tears. Jennifer was having more luck keeping her feelings in check. After all, she'd had a lot of time to get used to the idea that someone she cared about was a killer. She'd been hurt about as badly as she could a couple days before, when Melissa had found her, when she'd finally really internalized the reality of her situation.
Melissa put her hand on Jennifer's shoulder and gave her a couple of pats. Therapeutic physical contact. It was one of the few methods of comforting people Jennifer had never really had any luck with. She always worried that she'd be overstepping boundaries and making people uncomfortable, compounding their pain with awkwardness. This wasn't awkward, though. It did make her feel just the littlest bit better.
Melissa stared out at the world, and Jennifer followed her gaze. She could almost imagine she wasn't part of it anymore. From up here, it could all be pretend, be something that happened to other people, that they watched on TV.
It could hurt them, though. It had hurt them, and it would do so again.
"Um," she said to Melissa. "I'm, um... sorry."
I'm sorry your friend died.
I'm sorry you're waiting with me for a killer.
I'm sorry you didn't break your leg on the way to the bus.
"Thanks." Melissa said as she let out a deep sigh, shaking her head one last time. She didn't look at Jennifer as she laughed a bit, holding up her knees tight against her chest as she looked out at the world in front of her. "I...sorry, it's just...I dunno, I thought I was prepared for the announcements but I guess I wasn't, huh? I guess that's a good thing, though...right? It'd suck to be at a point where hearing about your friends killing and dying doesn't make you feel anything. I'm um...I'm sorry about Nick...and all. I'm...I'm sure there was a good reason for what he did."
She fell silent afterward, just rocking back and forth as she let her mind dwell on the past and the future. She didn't know what else they were going to do. After all, they were waiting for Nick and now Nick had gone and killed someone else again and Danya wasn't even kind enough to say where the kill had happened. At least they'd have a clue to his location...but once again, they had nothing but...but nothing. They were just wandering...letting their whims carry them wherever they wished.
"So uh...what do you wanna do next? Keep waiting?" Melissa asked. "Either one is fine with me...I mean, who knows, maybe someone's already found the note in the Hall of Mirrors and is coming to meet us here or something..."
She fell silent afterward, just rocking back and forth as she let her mind dwell on the past and the future. She didn't know what else they were going to do. After all, they were waiting for Nick and now Nick had gone and killed someone else again and Danya wasn't even kind enough to say where the kill had happened. At least they'd have a clue to his location...but once again, they had nothing but...but nothing. They were just wandering...letting their whims carry them wherever they wished.
"So uh...what do you wanna do next? Keep waiting?" Melissa asked. "Either one is fine with me...I mean, who knows, maybe someone's already found the note in the Hall of Mirrors and is coming to meet us here or something..."
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MurderWeasel
- Posts: 2566
- Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 1:37 am
Melissa spoke up after some time, saying that she hadn't been prepared for the announcements after all. It was something Jennifer could relate to. She didn't speak, though. She didn't want to talk about feeling nothing when the announcements came on. She didn't want to admit to Melissa that that was exactly how she had been for a few days. Looking back, she had a hard time recapturing her frame of mind. She was in an awkward middle ground right now. The dead people were still just things, of course. Anything else, any further contemplation, would probably mark the end of her sanity. The deaths, though, the ends of people, that she could register now. It was strange, the idea that people could just stop being.
Melissa justified Nick, and Jennifer felt horrible about it, because it was her fucking fault. She'd stood up for Nick before, and now Melissa was going to trust him, just like that. Melissa trusted Jennifer's judgment enough to risk her life with one of the island's bigger killers. It was a scary idea. Jennifer didn't know that she would be able to trust by proxy like that. If Maf turned up arm in arm with Maxwell, well, she'd run the other way as fast as she could.
And, worse, Melissa was asking her what to do next. Move on, or stay put? Jennifer paused for a second and considered. They were bordering two danger zones at the moment: the mansion and the greens. Anyone displaced from the greens could head their way and cause problems. On the other hand, it meant they only had to watch towards the woods, which lay slightly to their north.
Problem was, there were cliffs to the north, too. The trails out were near the danger zone edges or the coast. If anyone came at them from that direction, they'd be pinned. It would be incredibly simple to trap and kill them both, especially since their armament consisted of an icepick and a stove.
"Um, I think we should, um, move, maybe," Jennifer said. "The route to, um, the mirror hall is pretty sealed right now, so, um, we might have better luck heading for the mountains. He'd, um, probably check there first."
She moved towards the edge of the roof, preparing to carefully climb down, then paused for a second.
"Melissa," she said. "I, um, I need your help. Nick... I... I want to think I'm making the right choice, but, um, but I just don't know. And, um, and I don't want you to get stuck in a dangerous situation on, um, on my behalf."
Melissa justified Nick, and Jennifer felt horrible about it, because it was her fucking fault. She'd stood up for Nick before, and now Melissa was going to trust him, just like that. Melissa trusted Jennifer's judgment enough to risk her life with one of the island's bigger killers. It was a scary idea. Jennifer didn't know that she would be able to trust by proxy like that. If Maf turned up arm in arm with Maxwell, well, she'd run the other way as fast as she could.
And, worse, Melissa was asking her what to do next. Move on, or stay put? Jennifer paused for a second and considered. They were bordering two danger zones at the moment: the mansion and the greens. Anyone displaced from the greens could head their way and cause problems. On the other hand, it meant they only had to watch towards the woods, which lay slightly to their north.
Problem was, there were cliffs to the north, too. The trails out were near the danger zone edges or the coast. If anyone came at them from that direction, they'd be pinned. It would be incredibly simple to trap and kill them both, especially since their armament consisted of an icepick and a stove.
"Um, I think we should, um, move, maybe," Jennifer said. "The route to, um, the mirror hall is pretty sealed right now, so, um, we might have better luck heading for the mountains. He'd, um, probably check there first."
She moved towards the edge of the roof, preparing to carefully climb down, then paused for a second.
"Melissa," she said. "I, um, I need your help. Nick... I... I want to think I'm making the right choice, but, um, but I just don't know. And, um, and I don't want you to get stuck in a dangerous situation on, um, on my behalf."
Melissa nodded silently when Jennifer mentioned moving again. Their next destination bothered her, though...she didn't have many good memories of the mountain. Not only was it annoyingly hard to climb, but the fact that Samaya's body was probably still there...she quickly brushed that thought aside. Maybe they'd go to a different area of the mountain and not find her body at all. That would be nice. The last thing Melissa wanted was a reminder of the past when she had traveled with the other girls...she was with Jennifer now and things were peaceful...less rigid and more just...just living.
It sounded ridiculous when she said it in her head. That what she was doing now was living when compared to everything that had happened before. She didn't exactly even know why...maybe it was the fact that earlier with Aislyn in the lead, everything came down to survival and every moment was laced with a heavy dose of fear and us above them mentality. With Jennifer though...it was a lot more just...sitting around and waiting. Waiting for friends or to hear or see something good or to just talk philosophy. It was pleasant...almost like being at school again. Maybe that's what she meant by living.
She began climbing down as well, letting out a soft "Oof" as she landed. She blinked and looked up at Jennifer at the question and she blinked a couple of times before letting out a short laugh. "I don't mind...after all, we're on Survival of the Fittest. It's not like we can really be in even more danger, you know? But anyway...you're a good person, Jennifer...and a great friend. And I like doing things for my friends so..."
"So just don't worry about it, okay? I'll stick with you for as long as it takes, promise."
It sounded ridiculous when she said it in her head. That what she was doing now was living when compared to everything that had happened before. She didn't exactly even know why...maybe it was the fact that earlier with Aislyn in the lead, everything came down to survival and every moment was laced with a heavy dose of fear and us above them mentality. With Jennifer though...it was a lot more just...sitting around and waiting. Waiting for friends or to hear or see something good or to just talk philosophy. It was pleasant...almost like being at school again. Maybe that's what she meant by living.
She began climbing down as well, letting out a soft "Oof" as she landed. She blinked and looked up at Jennifer at the question and she blinked a couple of times before letting out a short laugh. "I don't mind...after all, we're on Survival of the Fittest. It's not like we can really be in even more danger, you know? But anyway...you're a good person, Jennifer...and a great friend. And I like doing things for my friends so..."
"So just don't worry about it, okay? I'll stick with you for as long as it takes, promise."
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MurderWeasel
- Posts: 2566
- Joined: Thu Aug 09, 2018 1:37 am
Jennifer hit the ground with a little exhalation. She straightened, smoothed her skirt, and looked around. The world was back in perspective. She was grounded again, forced back into reality. Her heart was lightened, however, by Melissa's words. Don't worry about it. Sound advice if she'd ever heard it, though not, perhaps, anything she could follow. Still, she had a friend, and here, now, that was enough.
"Thanks," she replied, taking a moment to look over the bodies again. Just things. Repeat that.
"I, um, I'll stick with you too, Melissa. As long as I can. I promise."
She knew, of course, that she wouldn't be able to be there for Melissa forever. She knew that, charmed life or no, her time would eventually come. She knew that an inability to kill, to even cause serious harm, was a death sentence on SOTF. She'd known that she was totally fucked since she'd woken up on the docks, since she'd smelled the ocean air (and she'd always wondered what the ocean was like, and she'd never even gotten to fucking go swimming) and seen the splintery wood.
She couldn't remember why she hadn't thrown herself over the side to drown, but she was glad she hadn't. Meeting Melissa again made all the pain worthwhile.
And maybe, just maybe, she'd be able to help her friend get out of this alive. It was highly unlikely. There were still over a hundred of their classmates left, and Jennifer couldn't really contribute to Melissa's survival in any meaningful way, but she could still hope.
So she smiled at Melissa, and got started towards the mountain. Maybe they could meet up with Nick again and convince him to stop killing. They could find somewhere passably safe, maybe return to the bar or something, and just tide things over.
Everything would be alright.
Only, she knew it wouldn't.
She knew they'd all die.
But, just for a little, it was nice to pretend.
((Jennifer Perez continued in I Will Follow You into the Dark))
"Thanks," she replied, taking a moment to look over the bodies again. Just things. Repeat that.
"I, um, I'll stick with you too, Melissa. As long as I can. I promise."
She knew, of course, that she wouldn't be able to be there for Melissa forever. She knew that, charmed life or no, her time would eventually come. She knew that an inability to kill, to even cause serious harm, was a death sentence on SOTF. She'd known that she was totally fucked since she'd woken up on the docks, since she'd smelled the ocean air (and she'd always wondered what the ocean was like, and she'd never even gotten to fucking go swimming) and seen the splintery wood.
She couldn't remember why she hadn't thrown herself over the side to drown, but she was glad she hadn't. Meeting Melissa again made all the pain worthwhile.
And maybe, just maybe, she'd be able to help her friend get out of this alive. It was highly unlikely. There were still over a hundred of their classmates left, and Jennifer couldn't really contribute to Melissa's survival in any meaningful way, but she could still hope.
So she smiled at Melissa, and got started towards the mountain. Maybe they could meet up with Nick again and convince him to stop killing. They could find somewhere passably safe, maybe return to the bar or something, and just tide things over.
Everything would be alright.
Only, she knew it wouldn't.
She knew they'd all die.
But, just for a little, it was nice to pretend.
((Jennifer Perez continued in I Will Follow You into the Dark))
Melissa smiled broadly as she heard Jennifer return the promise and she gave her a nod, hefting her pack over her shoulder. She took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, wondering if they'd come across anyone on their way to the mountains. Maybe they'd get lucky and run into Nick along the way and then they could have that talk that Melissa had always wanted. It'd be a nice, peaceful talk...just an exchange of information, of reasons, of ideals. She could almost imagine it...although the imagination was somewhat happened by the image of a bruised and bloody Nick bleeding all over the mountain so maybe it wasn't the best thing.
She quickly shook the sight out of her mind and walked after Jennifer. They still had a future. They still had hope. All they had to do was keep walking, keep living, and keep out of danger.
That's all it'd take.
It was good enough for her. She took another deep breath. They'd been lucky so far. There was no way the streak could end now.
(Melissa Li continued in I Will Follow You into the Dark.)
She quickly shook the sight out of her mind and walked after Jennifer. They still had a future. They still had hope. All they had to do was keep walking, keep living, and keep out of danger.
That's all it'd take.
It was good enough for her. She took another deep breath. They'd been lucky so far. There was no way the streak could end now.
(Melissa Li continued in I Will Follow You into the Dark.)
This is an archival account used by staff to port posts belonging to the handler Tythanin. While this handler hasn't been around in quite a while, should they return and wish to take custody of this account and/or its posts, they are welcome to do so by contacting staff.