Cliff Richard

[Gwbiii†]

((Richard Han Continued from When My Fist Clenches, Crack It Open.))

So fucking lost.

He felt he had to keep reminding himself of that fact. He'd totally lost the rest of team Awesome when Aaron had made his 'tactical' retreat, lodging a bullet in the tree Richard was hiding behind and sending him against the ground for cover.

It wasn't that he hadn't tried to follow them this time, but in the confusion he honestly had no idea what the group's general direction even was. And wandering around in the forest hadn't gotten him anywhere by nightfall. Come dawn, wakefulness and another round of announcements declaring his general location a danger zone he decided to give up on that strategy. So now he was heading for the biggest, most central landmark on the map and hoping he'd get lucky. It was worth a shot anyway.

The incline sure was a pain though. He was finally getting near the top, but with the sun beating on the side of his face and all the distance he'd covered he was sweating like a pig and his legs felt like roast ham. He wasn't verging on collapse or anything, but he was sick to death of all the walking. In his head he reminded himself that the mountain was a metaphor, or something, he couldn't quite remember what it was a metaphor of but it was definitely a metaphor. And a challenge. He relished challenges. Yes.

Fuck it, just a little rest.

He could see a nicely shaded spot a little bit further up the craggy path, a few dragging steps later and he slid his bag straps from each shoulder, letting them sag into the dried-up miniature watercourse that ran alongside the path.

He slumped against the boulder and took a seat. It felt cold through the sweat on his back. He fetched a water bottle from his bag and drank half of it in a few seconds. He was bound to find a little mountain stream or something sometime soon, or the spring for the river he'd crossed yesterday, water wasn't an issue. He looked out at all the ground he'd covered, the forest was a long way below now, the island stretched out before him and beyond that was nothing but water. There was a mess of storm clouds a long, long way out to sea that didn't seem to be paying the Island any mind.

He could think of worse places to die. And far worse places to live. On the other hand, beauty or no beauty he could really do with a home-cooked meal. This place was definitely lacking in the meal department.

He sighed. They'd be rescued sooner or later. He just had to survive, and how hard was that for a heroic protagonist type such as himself?

Besides, if he died, he'd be too busy living it up in the afterlife to care very much.

...Hope they do huǒ guō.

Raising the bottle to his lips again he emptied it, chucked it back in his bag, zipped that, stood up, grasped each of his ankles as he stretched each set of his quadriceps in turn, shook himself, put the bags over his back again, took another look out at the scenery, smiled, and continued his ascent.



Another 20 minutes passed before the radio tower's legs began to reveal themselves, he'd finally made it, now all he had to do was see if they were there and wait if they weren't and-

*beep*

"What was-"

*beep*

"FUCK."

*beep*

Richard turned and fled back down the mountain about 20 metres, 3 beeps was already way too many. His heart raced as he doubled over, taking a glance back at the radio tower before focusing back on the ground and his composure.

How could I have missed that what the fuck...

Okay to be fair he had been running for his life through the forest when the dangerzone announcements were being made but still what, the, fuck. Now he had no chance of meeting back up with the group except for sheer dumb luck.

Worst of all, he'd gone all that way for nothing more than a pretty view. Well, for a very pretty view, but still not justified in the current situation!

"Okay."

He'd have to make the best of a bad situation. Maybe find some way around the mountain so he could at least treat it as an exercise in reconnaisance. He backtracked, and sure enough, a little ways back down the path was a rocky trail leading away and around the mountain. He took it.




He made good pace across the more level ground, and each little rise held the promise of a little dip on the other side. To his sides the mountain just kind of rolled along, no sudden cliffs for a good 20 metres or so. And the path just kept meandering around. he could see the roof of a small building down in the woods below, that'd be... umm... the ranger's house. He thought of taking a look, but the windy path that led to it didn't seem to start anywhere near where he was, and he didn't like the idea of stumbling down the mountainside.

A bit further, he could see the end of the mountain's shadow, the south side of the island slowly coming into view. He'd spent all his time up til then on the north side and it kind of felt like he was in one of those jrpgs, discovering a new land as a panorama of exotic territory opens out before him.

Oh hey a ferris wheel.

He missed his step, stumbled, fell, and was soon rolling down the incline and gathering speed. He desperately tried to roll his weight against his spin,  grab onto something with his hands, stop himself with his legs but it seriously wasn't working and he was rolling down the mountain fuck fuck fuck why weren't there any tree branches!?

A rocky incline spun in and out of his vision. Perfect. If he hit that it'd hurt but at least he'd stop. He hit it at speed, and it didn't have enough of an angle to stop him altogether, or at all, and he went flying over it, grabbing at the ledge in vain as he became airborne.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

He was done for, as he tumbled over the turning point of his parabola he could see the mountainside disappear from under him. His eyes were open wide, taking in every last detail of the ground below. Gravity seemed to be pulling down at his stomach, and he had the most powerful butterflies, far, far flutterier than his first day of school, or during that one chess tournament in freshman, or when he asked Eiko to be his prom-date. He gulped before screaming again as his imminent, high velocity death began rising to meet him.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Fuck fuck fuck fuck last words come on fuck do better than that oh god fuck

He started to laugh like an insane monk as an idea came to him. With the wind beating at his body, he yelled at the top of his lungs, like he was never going to yell again and this was his magnum opus.

"YOU WIN THIS TIME, GRAAAVIIIIITYYYYYYYYY-

((Richard Han Continued in And As If It Couldn't Get Any Worse. ))