Prom for Failures

[General Goose]

Nick felt miserable. He felt like he was hungover and sick and depressed all at once. That every fibre of his being, every ounce of every organ, was just working overtime to remind Nick that he felt terrible, just in case he’d forget otherwise. What made it even worse was that the people around him - including the assholes of George Hunter High, that handful of students that Nick knew had no claim to moral superiority over him - were enjoying themselves. They were having fun. It may well have been fleeting fun, aided by smuggled-in alcohol and the oppressive social obligation to enjoy prom come what may, but it was fun nonetheless. Nick hated it.

If there was one small comfort, it’s that he was entirely justified in this reaction. He’d had a rather acrimonious breakup with Tristan, one that wasn’t planned or logical, one that resulted entirely, Nick knew logically, from him blowing up at him, from him being incredulous that Tristan had dared to interact with Myles. And things had...rotted away with Beryl. There wasn’t any formal split up there. No announcement, no changes to Facebook statuses, nothing like that. They just drifted apart. Most ‘drifting apart’ breakups took weeks, if not months, but the timbre of their increasingly scant interactions changed irredeemably over the course of just a few days. No more Scrabble games. No more reality TV binging. No more crazy nights of wild passion that were the sort of hedonistic extravagance every smart person should want.

He had had a lot of unreasonable emotional reactions over the years, a lot of times when a minor inconvenience provoke some fiery tantrum of disproportionate magnitude, but for once, he felt that his feeling utterly shit was valid, that his newly deep-rooted misanthropic sentiments were, if not justified, at least understandable. For once, he had every right to be in this extreme emotional state, to be a scowling and morose curmudgeon sinisterly prowling the perimeter of the floor.

He thought about talking to his friends. But they all were either tied up in the inevitable fallout of the Trisickyl breakup (which Nick had been tenaciously diligent in remaining oblivious of), or were enjoying themselves. Nick didn’t want that positive energy. Nah. He just wanted to do something spiteful, or lustful, or self-destructive or...other-destructive. Whatever. If they wanted to talk to Nick, to share in his misery or plot some evil prank with him, then they could come over and talk to him.

None of them did.

Then again, his body language wasn’t exactly welcoming. Nick had the performer’s spirit, after all. He knew what sort of message his whole posture and mien was conveying. It was not a tolerant message. It was a ‘get out of my way’ message.

It was annoying. In the back of his mind, Nick knew he wanted someone to talk to him. He just...didn’t have the energy, didn’t have the interest in his own well-being or anything else, to actually put the requisite effort in. Nick knew it was self-destructive. A kind of social self-harm. Fuck it. He’d done that before. He’d recovered from it. No reason to pretend like he couldn’t do it again, if he could ever be arsed.

At one point, Nick was considering just going into the men’s room and cutting out a gloryhole in one of the cubicles. That’d show them. He was mulling over the logistics of such a plan - having decided the ‘how’ was more important than whether he should or not - when, inadvertently, he made eye contact with Lukas. Lukas was a good egg. Part of his old group of friends, with Blaise and Heather and Gaelan. He was smart and mature in how he handled relationships, which Nick needed right now, with a non-judgemental and unbigoted sexual ethic that Nick fully agreed with. He liked Nick. He was Nick’s friend. That was important here. Nick needed a friend. And, furthermore, he needed a friend that he could theoretically use as a rebound. He didn’t know if Lukas also thought Nick was cute. Only one way to find out.

He ambled towards Lukas, casually. Not desperately. Walked towards him like he was just calmly surveying the scene, looking out for any friend rather than just deliberately closing in on one. Finally, when he was a few metres away from him, he closed the gap, arms outstretched for a hug. “Lukas, my man! How’ve you been, mate? You enjoying the prom so far? Any action?”

[jimmydalad]

Lukas didn't want to be here. He never really got the allure of prom. He was mostly here due to the obligation that every high school kid must go to prom. He certainly didn't hear the end of it from his parents, that was for sure. Being stuffed into a second-hand two-piece black suit with a white shirt and black tie wasn't really his idea of a fun evening. Nor was spending any more time stuck around his classmates than he necessarily had to. In the end, his mother was so excited for him to go to prom that it was hard for him to say no. It could be him being the odd one for liking prom. As he leaned against the wall, he mused on why he was so jaded on the concept of prom.

Maybe it was the fact that he had made the stubborn decision to be single for pretty much his entire time at George Hunter. Prom was basically the time to show off your relationships and flaunt how happy people are with each other. Relationships were never in the picture for him. It formed a part of his whole 'be as beige as possible' plan. Relationships were lightning rods of attention. Any romantic relationship he would end up getting intertwined in would definitely skew negative. The mere thought of putting himself in that firing range was daunting. It also helped that no one in George Hunter would even think of pursuing anything like that with him.

At least he was spending more time with Gaelan. Gaelan was always cool. Though he didn't really know where he was at the moment. Gaelan probably had other stuff to do at the prom. No need for him to be sucked into the enthusiasm blackhole that he was generating.

Lukas mostly had kept to the outskirts of prom. Staying outside of the danger zone and lurking on the sides was right in his wheelhouse. It gave him a good vantage point of the goings on of the event without having to put his neck on the line and throw himself in the thick of things. He surveyed the room, arms crossed and exuding an unwelcoming aura for anyone who noticed he was even there. His eyes flickered around as he took in the laughter and general enjoyment that seemed to pervade the room. God, he was sad.

Though he knew he really shouldn't, he couldn't help but take occasional glances at NIck. Why did he have to be so attractive? He was basically a no-go zone for him recently. Negative attention seemed to follow him like a stubborn dog and he could tell just from looking that he was having a rough time at the moment. Was it cruel of him to distance himself from someone he considered a friend? Possibly. He didn't like thinking about it like that. It wasn't like Nick actively sought him out for anything, even when his relationships were spiralling down the drain. It really shouldn't be on Lukas to take the initiative to help him. He might not have even listened to any advice Lukas would've given him. Still, seeing Nick look so miserable was not something Lukas was comfortable with. Even if he was a bit of a walking disaster, he was still Lukas's disaster.

Lukas totally meant that in a purely platonic sense.

He admired Nick for a bit longer than he should've been when they made eye contact. Oh shit, Nick noticed Lukas staring at him. Oh god, was he making his way over towards him? Lukas could feel his stomach drop and adopted a deer in the headlights look as his crush got closer. Like one of, if not the, only people in George Hunter he could concede to having a crush on. It was also someone he had sort of... no, not sort of. He had been ghosting him. He tried to compose himself as Nick got ever closer, though he wasn't able to completely hide the nervous energy that was coming from his eyes as they flickered around the room to see if anyone else was noticing.

"Hey, Nick." Lukas started, tingling slightly as he heard his delicious accent. Why did his accent have to be so sexy? "Prom is prom, I guess. Not really my thing. As for action? You know me. Don't think anyone would want to have any action with me."

He hesitated for a second before reciprocating the hug that was offered. Though he knew that he really shouldn't, he took time to really enjoy the hug. The fact that he could rest his head just below Nick's, feeling his beard brush against him. He could feel himself melting into the strong arms of his friend. It had been a while since he had hugged Nick that he forgot how nice his embraces were. A content sigh slipped out of his mouth as he let himself linger in the arms of Nick.

It took a few seconds to remember that they were in public. He eventually extracted himself from the hug, blushing as he looked down at the floor.

"Oh, uhh, sorry." The words dropped out of his mouth as the reality of the situation came back to him. He bit the bottom of his lip as he glanced around the room. "I, uhhh, heard a bit about what happened with Tristan and Beryl. I'm sorry you had to go through that. It sounds rough."

Probably better to broach the topic sooner rather than later. Plus, it'd distract from the possibly just a little too long hug that the pair shared. He still found it a bit difficult to look Luke in the eyes. He didn't want to see how he reacted to the hug they just shared.

[General Goose]

Nick enjoyed the hug with Lukas. Not anything untoward about that. He needed a friend right now, just hadn't the guts, the courage, to admit to himself that he'd needed that. Only when the hug with Lukas dragged on into the seconds was Nick able to admit to himself how much he'd needed something like this. Just a friend whose job wasn't to judge, or goad, or tease, or criticise - just to accept that, for now, he needed a hug. Some comfort. It made Nick feel at ease, and it showed him that Lukas would be someone he could rely on. Someone who could help him bounce back. Who could prove to Tristan and Beryl that they should have just put a little more work in.

"I mean, I haven't broken up with Beryl yet. Technically, anyway." Nick clicked his tongue. He did not enjoy the complexity of it all. The lack of a conclusive end, the fact that so many questions remained unanswered, the fact that there was no clear guide of what to do in this situation, it annoyed Nick. He didn't consider himself socially awkward, didn't consider himself the sort of introverted misfit who was beset with paralysing confusion when confronted with tricky social dilemmas. But then again, Nick had rarely been confronted with such dilemmas, not for a few years at least. He'd lived a hedonistic and libertine lifestyle, with a black and white view to friendships and rivalries, placing loyalty to his companions and the unerring maintenance of a cordial and light-hearted atmosphere his duties above all else.

And when Nick was confronted with difficult situations...well, he normally just got angry. Passionate, by the most charitable estimation. He would be enraged by some burning grievance or thrown into an episode of tumultuous mental distress due to an inability to cope. And that wasn't an ideal way of going about things, but at least meant that Nick didn't need to bother about subtleties. It meant that afterwards he just had to apologise or accept a bridge was burned. Really, Nick would have been okay with the breakup - at least, it wouldn't have demanded any more mental energy - had it occurred not just before prom. Especially with Beryl. He wasn't too bothered about the etiquette surrounding the rather more 'traditional' breakup that he'd had with Tristan, but Beryl was difficult. They were only going through the motions now, if that. The spark, the magic, had gone.

Turned out that the magic there was an illusion too.

But what was the etiquette around that? In a relationship that was dead, but the death certificate hadn't yet been issued? If there was any hope for this relationship, they'd have spent prom hanging out, chatting - the split with Tristan looming over them, certainly meriting a frank and open conversation - but at least talking. But they'd acted like nothing was amiss, just all a bit off, yet the moment they got the chance, they'd drifted off into separate directions. Not even with a joke about how awkward it was. They hadn't even done that.

Urgh.

Fuck it.

He could trust Lukas. He'd already decided that.

"But it's dead now, so I don't think I'll be going home with her tonight." He shrugged. Nick was able to act pretty flippant about all this, mainly because he'd already vented out all his emotions with his family and thrown a few tantrums at home. "So looking to find someone who I can go home with early and fuck their brains out, if I'm totally honest." He shrugged again. "And I'm sure you can find someone, Lukas. You're cute."