Captain Without a Crew

[Applesintime]

Ashanti took the baton while sighing, and Anthony's load was just that little bit lighter. The axe was heavy enough as is, but it was helpful to carry something else, in the case that the De Lisle and the pistol he took from Diana's dead body either ran out of ammo or got taken away from him. Twisting his head around to make sure nobody was sneaking up on them, Anthony looked back at her. She was gesturing for him to go into the cabin that she had emerged from. Shrugging, he made her way inside, past Ashanti.

"We really should have shot her. Could have got you her rifle, then you'd have a bit more range." But what was done was done. They would inevitably run into each other again, and Anthony wasn't going to hesitate. Shoot first, and you're one step closer to home. Sighing, Anthony sat down on the bed, right on top of the student roster. "The fuck," He got up, picked it up, and looked at it. Luanne, Kaya, Bethan... a list. Holding it in his hands, Anthony looked up at Ashanti. "List of everyone here, huh?" Flipping through it, Anthony ripped out Elliott-Blair's page. "Shot him about five minutes ago," Anthony explained, in case he looked weird.

[Brackie]

Ashanti was getting tired of constantly being told she should have killed people long after the fact. It was bad enough when Matias was telling it to her, but now this boy she'd never met was getting in on the act?

Like, of course she probably should have killed Mandy, or Kaya. It was easy to say that now, after the fact. She didn't know how it was going to turn out if she didn't kill the person in question, except maybe for her not killing Matias probably saved someone else's life from being responsible for Seo-yun leaving. She'd made a choice, and she'd seen it through, even if it had been the wrong choice. Any less and she'd veer away. She didn't need random boys second guessing everything she was doing.

She also didn't need him sitting on her binder.

She also didn't need him ripping a page out of it what the fuck

Ashanti immediately tossed the gun and cane onto the bed, before stepping forward and snatching the page of the person she killed out of his hands, with a random girl her teammate had killed a few days ago on the other side. Putting aside the fact that it was her property he was defacing, it was also the only tool she had to communicate to people. She was going to be flailing her hands around like a child regardless, but having things to point to made things easier for everyone. She turned back to her binder, punctured some new holes through the sides of Elliot-Blair and Sarah, before closing it and lifting it to her chest.

Ashanti pointed to the binder, pointed to herself, and made a talking motion with her hand.

[Applesintime]

Ashanti seemed rather protective of her binder, and Anthony raised his hands defensively as she snatched it from him. "Sorry, just... he's dead. Elliott-Blair. I guess we don't need to know about the dead. Unless they bloody come back as zombies or something." He forced out a laugh, but really, this was all starting to get a little awkward. Ashanti seemed reluctant to speak, protective of her binder... It was nice to see another person who wasn't gonna shoot him - well, probably - but there was something lovely and simple about the mindset of seeing someone else, shooting them, and going about your day easy-peasy.

"I don't get it." Ashanti made a couple of motions, and Anthony just tilted his head. What was she trying to say? She hadn't spoken a single word; not to Matias or anyone at the pool, and not to him or Kaya. Had she been maimed somehow? Tongue cut out? A flash of brilliance struck him, and he unzipped his bag, fumbling around until he found his old notebook and the pencil. Ripping out his old scorecard and throwing it off the balcony, Anthony put it on the bed besides him and patted it. "Here. Uh, if you can't talk, dunno if you're injured or loon- a mute, or what, but we aren't gonna be able to work together well if we aren't gonna be talking. Good pencil and paper ought to do the trick."

"Oh, and, uh, Ben? Dunno if you're still huffing at me or what, but d'you know anything about our missing link? Greg?" Couldn't hurt to ask.

[Brackie]

Ashanti was going to put aside the fact that Anthony called her a loon and take grasp of the situation. For one, he had a notepad and pen now. She could write. She could communicate. She hadn't gotten ahold of one for the entire game, and now, when it came down to her and the actual loon in the same room, he'd provided her with a way to communicate with the outside world.

She took an energetic step towards the bed, before suddenly pausing.

How did this play into...well, what she was doing? She'd said no speaking, no translating her words for the cameras, even on the offchance that they could somehow give her a voice. The scream had been borderline. The speaking with her hands even moreso. How much was she risking by writing things down? A lot? More than a lot? Everything? What if a shot of her holding up what she was saying became something lasting from the season if she died? She would only be okay with that if she lived. She had no guarentee of that right now.

Ashanti swallowed, before looking around the room. She saw cameras. She looked back at Anthony. She really, really needed him to understand her deal here.

Ashanti pointed at herself, then the notepad.

She held up one finger. She made a cross with her arms. She pointed to the cameras with two fingers, then back to her own eyes.

Ashanti hoped and prayed that the boy who killed seven people could understand first grade hand gestures.

[Applesintime]

Herself. Notepad. A finger. An X. Camera. Eyes. She was maybe... willing to use the notepad, but if the cameras didn't see? Maybe? God, he should have taken those ASL classes his dad suggested, but Anthony didn't think it would have been useful because, y'know, American Sign Language and British Sign Language were two different things. And now he wished he had. Was she even using ASL? He could have taught some to her, but he couldn't, so that idea was out of the picture.

"I'll, uh... If I have it right, I'll sorta block the camera, and then you can... do your writing thing?" He thought that was what she was suggesting, so without waiting for Ashanti to asnwer, he moved to sort of stand in front of the bed, with the notebook behind him so Anthony was blocking a bunch of the cameras. "We could maybe cover them with sheets? I dunno if they'd let us do that or what, but, uh... if we can't cover them all with our bodies I guess we could try that?" They should try and find a whiteboard or something. Would make shit a lot easier.

[Brackie]

Blocking the cameras? Fine.

Covering with sheets? Better.

Ashanti quickly put down her binder on one bed, and grabbed the notepad and pen from the other. In one quick motion, she pulled off the top sheet from the notepad bed and pulled Anthony underneath. The lighting could have been better, but they could see each other, and Ashanti could still see the writing surface.

Quickly becoming a polyglot, Ashanti communicated in her fourth language.

hi

Ashanti paused for a moment, before continuing writing.

don't read this outloud. ok?

She turned the notepad back around so Anthony could see.

[Applesintime]

"Wa-" Anthony turned around, only to get grabbed. He didn't expect to get pulled towards the bed by Ashanti, or to be pulled underneath the sheets at all. It was sorta dark; the sheets were porous enough to have some daylight seep through, and the little tent they were making wasn't entirely flush with the bed; still better than nothing. Catching his breath, Anthony looked towards Ashanti, who was busy writing. This was one way to block the cameras, he guessed. Didn't run the risk of like, getting their collars blown for disrupting the cameras either, so it was probably the better option.

It was sorta like something from when he was younger. Back in London. He'd be under his covers reading the latest book he'd grabbed from the library when he should be sleeping and praying that Dad didn't check up on him. And now Anthony was... under the covers when he should be killing people and praying that someone didn't choose this room by sheer coincidence. Things never really changed, did they?

"Gotcha." Anthony whispered back, and then there was an awkward silence as Anthony thought about what he would say next. "Uh... how are you doing?" It was a pretty simple question, but he couldn't think of anything better. And it was an important one. If she was injured or something that might affect her fighting ability. She didn't look injured, but Anthony didn't look like he had been shot. Appearances could be deceiving. He just focused on Ashanti, on her reply,

Faintly, he remembered that the collars had cameras on them too. She didn't need to know that. Or remember it.

[Brackie]

I'm alright all things considered

I was with Matias since this whole thing started

We were looking for our team

back at the pool

things got worse since then



I think it was my fault

[Applesintime]

"And then you guys found me and uh, Luanne and Nadine fighting each other. That was when I was, uh..." Anthony paused, trying to think of how to word what he wanted to say. How do you explain that you'd effectively been deluding yourself into playing under the belief that you were actually killing players, and now you've just had a revelation and you've decided that even though you're a killer, committed one of the biggest sins seven times, you can't stop now? That you can beg the Lord's forgiveness when it's all over and you have the chance to pick up the pieces of yourself that shattered and try to rebuild yourself?

"In a different state of mind." At first, he was going to stop there, but Anthony's mouth just kept moving, spilling everything in his head out. Maybe it was what he needed. "I was convinced I was hunting players, but, like, the only time I got a killer was RJ and Nadine, and her one kill was a mercy kill and RJ was an accident. I just sorta thought... realised, rather, that I'm a player. I want to go home. That's what Beau wanted, too. And maybe that's selfish, you know? I dunno. I can think about all the moral... whatever the fuck when I get home. I can pray for forgiveness when I'm safe." Fiddling with his crucifix necklace, Anthony sorta realised that maybe he had, like, talked a little too much about himself.

"It's not your fault. It's hers. Seo-yun." Her name was spat like it tasted disgusting. "I'm going to kill her. When this is done. When this is all over, she needs to pay for what she's done. For Leah. For everyone. And I'm going to start with her little bitch. Mandy. I'm going to make it fucking hurt, because it's all Seo-yun's fault that she has to die like that. Maybe that's part of why I want to win this thing. So she can pay for what she's done." He almost wished he had went with Matias and Ashanti now. But Anthony had blazed his own path for better or for worse.

[Brackie]

Ashanti nodded at every juncture. Not out of agreement, or empathy, but simply an attempt to take it all in.

So, she had good confirmation from the boy himself - he went crazy, started hunting down players, including who she now knew not to be Marion's murderer, but in fact Marion's last gasp, didn't actually get anyone who was playing, thought he had a breakthrough, instead just redirected his energy towards people after the fact. Not that she could blame him, at least for the last part. When Ashanti found out Seo-yun got her ten kills, she could only think of just how badly she fucked up with Mandy.

It kind of was her fault Seo-yun got out and their team was down to the three of them, Gregory unaccounted for. But she could reckon with that when fate would come rushing down the aisle to met them.

She took in his body language throughout, especially his focus on the crucifix around his neck and his mention of prayer. She had her own thoughts on that. She'd write them down for him later, maybe. There wasn't exactly time to dwell on literally everything as it pertained to her.

There was time for a few of those, though.

Ben didn't have nice words to say about you
guess i know why now

but i'm gonna stay with you

Ashanti took a few moments to think about the time she'd spent with Mandy. With Seo-yun gone, it probably meant that Mandy herself moved onto the part of the plan she talked about.

i was with mandy
said her plan was to get back with her team once s-y left
if we're gonna go for her, we could see who that is?

Ashanti would have to think later about how she'd just promised a second boy that she was ready to kill. There wasn't time now.

Her binder, having bounced open from her chucking it away to write under the covers, lay open on Elliott-Blair's face on the other bed.

[Applesintime]

It didn't seem like Ashanti was mad at him or like, freaking out over Anthony telling her his SOTF story. Not that he expected her to get mad or freak, but it was nice to let it all out to someone who wasn't just a faceless voice on a boat who wasn't living what you were living, someone who could afford to make shitty jokes and get mad at you for doing what you thought was right. He didn't begrudge Ben, no, but there was a disconnect. He knew what it was like, but he didn't know what it was like for Anthony. It had been hell at the start of the game, a nightmare dredged up from the deepest, darkest part of his soul, the worst-case scenario.

It still was. But he'd gotten used to it now. Ashanti had finished writing by the time that he snapped out of his mind, and as Anthony read, he nodded.

"Nothing nice to say, huh? We did get into a bit of an argument, yeah, so, uh, yeah, I get it. Probably didn't help that in the heat of the moment I said I was gonna kill everyone on my team." Anthony eyed Ashanti nervously. "But, I came to my senses. Why throw away an ally over like, getting pissed at your mentor? It's stupid." A lot of what he did seemed stupid now. But he must have been doing something right, because seven people were dead and Anthony was still standing. Still alive. Ashanti was gonna tag along with him, too. All they needed to do was find Greg, find him a gun, and they'd be doing brilliant.

"You were with her?" Anthony raised her eyebrow, before realising it didn't matter and sighing. She was gonna team up with her teammates, huh? "Right, I'll go grab the book. Just a sec." Anthony crawled out from under the covers, making sure the camera didn't get to see inside their little bedsheet refuge, grabbed the binder and pushed it under the covers before wriggling back under and flipping through it. Mandy Gross, Mandy Gross, Mandy Gross-

"Oh, fuck off." Anthony whined upon finding her teammates. Fisk and Verity. God damn it.

[Brackie]

As Anthony got up to get her binder, she instinctively folded over the writing surface. She knew there wasn't a camera ready to pry right under the sheets, but safety took precedent over sorryness.

Within seconds, Anthony returned, flipped to Mandy's team, and Ashanti began taking note of who was alive and who was gone.

Fisk Bateman, and Verity Stewart. Two freaks and weirdos from their entire grade of freaks and weirdos, present company included. From all she could tell, Verity got the first kill of the version, killed one of Ashanti's best friends, a death she had yet to process or contemplate because it happened in the midst of so much else, and then teamed up with Fisk to kill one of her last remaining team members. Fisk himself had gotten kills from the beginning. They were definitely a team. If Mandy found them, she had an entire wall between her and whatever resembled a team of Ashanti and Anthony.

She stared at the pages of her binder, at the inpenetrable obstacles between them and revenge.

Ashanti then looked up, and stared at the boy who had more kills than both of Mandy's protection squad, combined.

She unfolded her notepad.

same

The edge of one side of her mouth curled into a curt smile.

literally the only major threats to you on this boat and they're on the same team, protecting the only person i want dead

There was a lie somewhere in that sentence, but Ashanti had committed to ignoring those.

what do you think our odds are?

[Applesintime]

Ashanti seemed on board with the plan, judging by what she had written. She wanted Ashanti dead just like him, was already thinking about their odds... It seemed like a good partnership already.

"On our own, against the Respects? Fisk has a tommy gun, or," Anthony squinted, "whatever the fuck an American-180 is. And Verity's armed as well, because she shot Keegan. And then Mandy has Seo-yun's guns, presumably. Our best chance would be skirmishes; get in, shoot one, get out. But, but, we're not the only ones with something against them. Ivan Rodriguez." Flipping to the aforementioned's page, Anthony let out a little chuckle. "As far as I can tell, the Respects - Fisk's little group of players by the way, they tried to kill him at the very start of this game. He lived, and he's pissed. So he's been going after them all game, and he's done pretty well. Enemy of my enemy is my friend, I guess." And then if Ivan's still standing at the end of this, they shoot him. It seemed pretty simple.

"But I don't think they're, like, the only major threats. Again, Ivan could be a ballache. Akeno, as well." Anthony stabbed at her page with a finger. "She would be lethal in a fistfight. Sure, we have guns, but this thing has jammed once," he nodded at his De Lisle, "and knowing my luck it'd fucking jam again at the right time. Although, that's why I have a backup, I guess." He patted his little... whatever the fuck he had in his waistband. Flintlock? Christ, they were really going with the nautical theme. "And then Kaya. God, we should have just shot her. You coulda taken her rifle, we'd be well-armed... but there's always gonna be another chance." His mouth opened, but Anthony paused. Did he want to ask this?

He had to. "I... I wanna ask, though. If you, uh... do you think you can kill another person if you get the chance to? It's a... big step. The first one's the hardest." He tried to not think about Beau. "Do that, and it just... it gets a lot easier." It felt like a weird question to ask Ashanti, but he had to know that she wouldn't freeze up and get them both killed if she had the shot on Fisk or Verity or whoever they might be going against. Looking down at the pages, at their names, weapons and a quirky little comment from their mentor, Anthony reminded himself that they were just people. Fisk may seem like some impenetrable cult leader, but he was just a guy. A bullet killed him as easily as anyone else.

"But in general, getting back to our odds? I'd say we've got a pretty fucking good shot." A smile crept onto Anthony's face.

[Brackie]

Ashanti wanted to interrupt Anthony and ask him what the hell the Respects were, but the colours inside the lines started to fill in the more he talked. There was some serenity to not being obliged to talk, only chiming in at the end of someone else's speech, but it meant she was being left behind a lot. From what she could tell, a group of players, under Fisk Bateman, all tried to kill Ivan Rodriguez at the start of the game, and Ivan got revenge and killed them all. But Fisk had recovered, kept on trucking, and got himself a new Respects, which included Verity and Mandy. Fat lot of good Mandy would do to that group, but it did mean it wasn't going to be easy.

God, she'd really commited, huh? The first day was going to repeat itself.

And even without Mandy and Fisk and Verity, the fact remained that there were still some dangerous people out there. Kaya, apparently, and Ivan himself. But Ashanti wasn't going to let herself be worried, even if she wanted to. Anthony was here, and she was helping him. It was more than enough.

But then Anthony had to ask a question she'd already thought she'd answered.

Oh.

She hadn't told him what happened with Matias, had she?

As Anthony contemplated their odds, Ashanti's head was down, and she was writing. She eventually stopped, turning the notepad back around

i technically already ha
i was with matias
until the announcements i thought i had killed somebody.

s-y found me and matias yesterday, shot him. she left before he died, and he wanted me to kill him. and
i did. he was in pain, he was hurt, and he wanted me to make sure s-y didn't add him to her list, get out because of him
so i shot him
i thought i killed him
i went all of last night thinking i had killed him
and it turns out i was too late and s-y got credit for his death anyway



does that change anything

[Applesintime]

"...Fucking Seo-yun." Anthony shook his head upon reading what Ashanti had written. He couldn't blame her, but if she had managed to kill Matias before Seo-yun's wounds finished him off, she would still be here, maybe. He'd have been able to kill her here and now, make sure the whole world watched as Anthony did something that would make Erin Crawford's death seem like a little walk in the park, with flowers and sunshine and an alligator. Oh fuck, he was the only alligator meeter left, wasn't he? Seth was dead. Beau was dead. Leah was dead, too, and that left only Anthony. So many people were dead. Flipping through the binder, Anthony saw nothing but pages of people who had ascended to be with the Lord. Or with Satan, depending on who they were. Junji didn't seem like the kind of person who would go to heaven.

Would he go to Heaven if he died? Seven times murder was a serious sin, after all. Or could he justify it with it being all in extremis? Anthony was quiet for a moment, the only sound their breathing.

Eventually, he shook his head. "No. You've, uh, you've got over the mental barrier. That's the most important thing. You were fully ready to kill him, and in your head for a while you did. That's the important thing. First one's always hardest." Beau still hurt. Beau still hurt a lot, and he just added to the maelström of pain and regret that was starting to weigh Anthony down. "Anyway, uh, I think we should rest up for now. Night's going to be coming, and... endgame triggers at like, six people right? We can't be too far from the end. So, uh... get some sleep, eat some food, take a shower, just whatever. I'm gonna take one first, though. Just, uh... feel a little grimy." Anthony let out a little insincere chuckle, pushing out of the bed and heading into the bathroom area.

Only when he was alone, and the sound of the shower would mask his noise, did the tears start.

((Anthony Golden continued in Bombs in the Void))