“You don’t owe anyone the continuation of your story if you’re not feeling it. Honestly. People don’t think as much about you as you do about yourself. If they’re disappointed in the story of you, if they dislike the Verity Experience- terrible band name by the way, don't use it- then that’s their problem and not yours.”
“It’s only your problem if they like, take a gun to your head I guess. Or if they decide to cut your contract or sponsorship because you’re a shitty winner and you’re not driving viewer engagement. The virgin Verity versus the chad Seo-Yun.”
“Man. Imagine if it hadn’t been the two of us and we’d been back in Mangrove chilling and watching our classmates run around being cucked.”
“Or I guess more realistically we’d have exchanged like, one set of Discord messages, two weeks apart, during the runtime. No Verity, I did not watch Alyssa stripping down to bathe. Yes Verity, I will finally put aside time to listen to The Father of Death.”
“Pro tip, I didn’t listen cover to cover I stopped on like track three. You and I both know that.”
“Yeah yeah, sorry, getting off track again. Where were we?
You Started, You're Finishing
TV3 Endgame, Part 8 of 10.
-
Wham Yubeesling
- Posts: 1257
- Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:15 pm
- Location: there is a man standing behind you
- Team Affiliation: Stephanie's Buccaneers
- Contact:
Why do you care about the story so much anyway? Where did that even come from? Like, maybe you wanted to change it, try and live and not be just be that girl set up to burn bright, burn fast, burn out, but wasn’t all this stuff about the importance of the story just feeding into it, anyway? Giving the producers what they wanted? Like, cool, you’re not a person anymore. You’re a character. You’re a thing on the screen. Live, or die, everything you do ties into the story. Do the right thing, then you’re doing the story right. Do the wrong thing, you drag it down. Dare to be more than some kind of first act killer, dare to outstay your welcome, pad your stay?
God, fuck that.
You know what the real question is.
So.
Where are you?
God, fuck that.
You know what the real question is.
So.
Where are you?
“Right, at the part where I tried to impart ‘wisdom’ unto you, air quotes. It’s not your problem.”
“Like. There’s only one person who gets to decide what any of this means to you, and I think you’ve spent the last… however many bullets have been shot at you reckoning with that fact.”
“Nobody’s feedback is going to decide the worth of your story, or how it ends, or whether the fan artists are going to gentrify you and make you ungodly sexy in a way that’s hilariously inaccurate or whatever.”
“You’re still looking for the final answer.”
“Cupping that fire you’ve got going between your hands, huddled over protective like. Waiting for someone or something to come along and say the thing. Make the noise.
“And then, whoops, your characterization is now perfect and everything makes sense.”
“And you know I’m not good at explaining myself, but I think you’re going about it a bit wrong. Mostly right, but there’s a few edits you could make.”
“Right now you’re on that, carrying all of our legacies.”
“I respect it, Verity. It’s a good narrative weight to add gravity to the conclusion of this whole ‘killing kids’ thing you’ve got going on for you now.”
“Still just that though.”
“I’m here because you want my opinion, right? If you wanted Fisk you’d have dialed him up again. I’m sure you could’ve gotten a word in edgewise from any of the rest of us. Akeno, James, Alyssa, BB.”
“You know I’m the one person who will elect to not play your game.
“Not necessarily because I disagree with you, but because I’m too busy being me. Specifically, too busy sucking, but still. Who I choose to be.”
“It’s like… The people you’re carrying along with you, Verity. The legacies you’re trying to make into your narrative drive.
“All you.”
“Like. There’s only one person who gets to decide what any of this means to you, and I think you’ve spent the last… however many bullets have been shot at you reckoning with that fact.”
“Nobody’s feedback is going to decide the worth of your story, or how it ends, or whether the fan artists are going to gentrify you and make you ungodly sexy in a way that’s hilariously inaccurate or whatever.”
“You’re still looking for the final answer.”
“Cupping that fire you’ve got going between your hands, huddled over protective like. Waiting for someone or something to come along and say the thing. Make the noise.
“And then, whoops, your characterization is now perfect and everything makes sense.”
“And you know I’m not good at explaining myself, but I think you’re going about it a bit wrong. Mostly right, but there’s a few edits you could make.”
“Right now you’re on that, carrying all of our legacies.”
“I respect it, Verity. It’s a good narrative weight to add gravity to the conclusion of this whole ‘killing kids’ thing you’ve got going on for you now.”
“Still just that though.”
“I’m here because you want my opinion, right? If you wanted Fisk you’d have dialed him up again. I’m sure you could’ve gotten a word in edgewise from any of the rest of us. Akeno, James, Alyssa, BB.”
“You know I’m the one person who will elect to not play your game.
“Not necessarily because I disagree with you, but because I’m too busy being me. Specifically, too busy sucking, but still. Who I choose to be.”
“It’s like… The people you’re carrying along with you, Verity. The legacies you’re trying to make into your narrative drive.
“All you.”
-
Wham Yubeesling
- Posts: 1257
- Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:15 pm
- Location: there is a man standing behind you
- Team Affiliation: Stephanie's Buccaneers
- Contact:
Right. You’re on the ladder. You’re over the water. You can hear everything. The ocean. The ship. The ringing in your ears. This is where you can die, if you want to. If there’s a reason to.
Do you want that?
Really?
Don’t ask your story. Ask your impulses. Do you want to die? Do you want to bleed out in the freezing cold? Do you wanna lose the rest of your life? Do you wanna lose any chance you have that this could all get better?
No?
Well, this is where you start climbing.
Not for the producers.
Not for your “””””””””story.“””””””””
Not for the people in your head you claim to be doing this for.
Just for you.
All you.
Do you want that?
Really?
Don’t ask your story. Ask your impulses. Do you want to die? Do you want to bleed out in the freezing cold? Do you wanna lose the rest of your life? Do you wanna lose any chance you have that this could all get better?
No?
Well, this is where you start climbing.
Not for the producers.
Not for your “””””””””story.“””””””””
Not for the people in your head you claim to be doing this for.
Just for you.
All you.
“That’s not any of us. We made our decisions, we died our deaths. Some of them were atrociously lame- case in point. Our names are just the shoutouts in the story you’re continuing to tell for yourself.”
“Like I said before, it goes how you want it to.”
“You don’t owe it to anyone to live or to die. Not to Fisk’s memory of the Respects or whatever the fuck his weird gangly ghost is on about. Not to any of the people you’ve killed who you think will only get to live on through you.”
“It’s just you, Verity. That weird ass chick I became friends with over some weird ass niche interest once upon a time.”
“No one burns the fire but you. Let everyone else have their own stories. This is yours.”
“That probably doesn’t help much but unfortunately, like I said, it wasn’t going to be anything definitive. Just this one idea from this one voice in your head, question mark, that maybe expands the soupy mess of perspectives you have on the story of your life, question mark.”
“Bunch of questions, that’s all I got. But you’re used to that.”
“So yeah.”
“And…”
“Like I said before, it goes how you want it to.”
“You don’t owe it to anyone to live or to die. Not to Fisk’s memory of the Respects or whatever the fuck his weird gangly ghost is on about. Not to any of the people you’ve killed who you think will only get to live on through you.”
“It’s just you, Verity. That weird ass chick I became friends with over some weird ass niche interest once upon a time.”
“No one burns the fire but you. Let everyone else have their own stories. This is yours.”
“That probably doesn’t help much but unfortunately, like I said, it wasn’t going to be anything definitive. Just this one idea from this one voice in your head, question mark, that maybe expands the soupy mess of perspectives you have on the story of your life, question mark.”
“Bunch of questions, that’s all I got. But you’re used to that.”
“So yeah.”
“And…”
-
Wham Yubeesling
- Posts: 1257
- Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:15 pm
- Location: there is a man standing behind you
- Team Affiliation: Stephanie's Buccaneers
- Contact:
All your actions.
All your mistakes.
All your regrets.
Everything that led you up to now. Everything that… you want to keep going. Because you don’t want to die. Not really. Maybe some shithead kid in the past dreamed some fucking school shooter fantasy about how cool it’d be to be on SotF but that’s then. This is now. You don’t want to feel the cold. You don’t want to blink out. Stop thinking. You want to live.
So you do it. You climb up the ladder. You bear through the pain in your arm, in your shoulder, in your everything, just like you did the first two times. You go up, and up, and up, and when you eventually reach the top, you lay down. Let exhaustion take you. You hope nobody finds you. Comes to finish the job.
And…
All your mistakes.
All your regrets.
Everything that led you up to now. Everything that… you want to keep going. Because you don’t want to die. Not really. Maybe some shithead kid in the past dreamed some fucking school shooter fantasy about how cool it’d be to be on SotF but that’s then. This is now. You don’t want to feel the cold. You don’t want to blink out. Stop thinking. You want to live.
So you do it. You climb up the ladder. You bear through the pain in your arm, in your shoulder, in your everything, just like you did the first two times. You go up, and up, and up, and when you eventually reach the top, you lay down. Let exhaustion take you. You hope nobody finds you. Comes to finish the job.
And…
“If I ever pop up here again, maybe years from now, when you’re waking up in a cold sweat in the bedroom of your sweet bachelorette pad you’ve bought with your TV checks, with the real-to-life image of my body crashing into the waves fresh in your memory?”
“I’ll be happy to reminisce. Or maybe think about the future.”
“Either or. Just remember that it’s my opinion on your story. And that opinion doesn’t actually matter.”
“I’ll be happy to reminisce. Or maybe think about the future.”
“Either or. Just remember that it’s my opinion on your story. And that opinion doesn’t actually matter.”
-
Wham Yubeesling
- Posts: 1257
- Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:15 pm
- Location: there is a man standing behind you
- Team Affiliation: Stephanie's Buccaneers
- Contact:
And you take a breath.
And you take a breath.
And your lungs are burning and it feels like a massive hole in your chest and it hurts but-
But you’ve felt worse, at this point.
And when you’ve lost an eye, lost your innocence, lost your friend, lost your allies, lost everything except your life, then…
Then this was nothing. You could power through. You did when everything else happened. Not because you wanted to, not because it didn’t hurt. It happened because you had to try. Because there was no other option. No other way but forward. Time would move, smoke would burn, and your lungs would run out, whether you liked it or not.
But you could still try.
You could still power through.
You could still try to win this.
Didn’t need a reason.
Didn’t need an excuse.
And you take a breath.
And your lungs are burning and it feels like a massive hole in your chest and it hurts but-
But you’ve felt worse, at this point.
And when you’ve lost an eye, lost your innocence, lost your friend, lost your allies, lost everything except your life, then…
Then this was nothing. You could power through. You did when everything else happened. Not because you wanted to, not because it didn’t hurt. It happened because you had to try. Because there was no other option. No other way but forward. Time would move, smoke would burn, and your lungs would run out, whether you liked it or not.
But you could still try.
You could still power through.
You could still try to win this.
Didn’t need a reason.
Didn’t need an excuse.
"Never did."
-
Wham Yubeesling
- Posts: 1257
- Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:15 pm
- Location: there is a man standing behind you
- Team Affiliation: Stephanie's Buccaneers
- Contact: