((Ximena Rodriguez continued from The Night Is My Friend )
She had lost the helping hands boost some time ago.
And she had worn David's shoes down to the soles.
Ximena huddled under the emergency blanket that came with her first aid kit. She'd thrown as much sand and dirt on it as she could to look like a rock or some lumpy part of the landscape. As the dawn encroached, she tried to regain her strength. As had become her compulsion, she ran her hands over her neck as if always checking to make sure she was really unshackled.
And at times like these she wondered, "How did I get here?" What choices did she make that led her to be in this precise spot, pretending to be a rock or a dune and covered in the blood of like three different people?
The only thing that she could clearly think in her partial delirium was
"Mother fucking Idaho potatoes."
The Day Is My Enemy
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Carrion Queen
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Carrion Queen
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Ximena peaked out from under the blanket and blinked. She had gotten maybe a few hours of fitful rest.
A second blanket came, this time of clouds covering the sky. The day would be temperate. It looked like it might rain by nightfall, which was unexpected. Was it lucky? She huddled back under her cover and took out a bottle from her bag to drink. After taking a deep sip, she screwed the cap back on and lay back down. It reminded her of hiding under the covers as a kid. Something scuttled over her, thinking she was a part of the landscape.
“Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile, the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
Are moving across the landscapes
Over the prairies and the deep cacti,
And the mountains and dunes,” she whispered.
Ximena couldn’t wrap her head around the concept of being lucky. Choosing to go on this trip should have been an indicator of her general luck. Wasn’t there a guy though whose whole thing was being lucky? It didn’t seem to help him since she recalled him sitting on the bus.
If it became colder now and rained later, it meant she’d have to work not to freeze at night. But traveling at night meant she wouldn’t be easily seen. If she had a little more luck, she thought, maybe they hadn’t even noticed she’d left.
How far had she traveled? She had been trying not to push too hard so as to hurt herself or expend so much energy that she would be useless. Using her Gift on her feet meant that it was the Gift powering them rather than her muscles and lungs, for the most part, but she could still injure herself. On and off for maybe six hours, using her Gift to power up her speed, let’s say it was taking her 6 minutes to run a mile. That would mean maybe 50 miles, wouldn’t it? But she didn’t know if any of those numbers were accurate. Maybe none of that was right -- she had no way to know.
Ximena felt tired in a way that went beyond the norm. It was like there was a chunk taken out of her chest and in her head. She had been using Raja’s jacket as a blanket again while waiting out the cold hours between dawn and noon to pass. She managed to unfasten the enamel pin of a pink, purple, and blue flag. After a few tries due to her unsteady hands, she managed to pin it onto the middle of her skirt. She sighed shakily and lay flat again on her side.
Even after everything, putting the pin on sent a small spike of fear through her. How stupid.
Stupid. Worthless. That's why nothing works out for you. That's why you can't even imagine in your wildest dreams even a single good thing happening.
A suicidal girl was hiding in the desert, clinging to life as hard as she could.
A second blanket came, this time of clouds covering the sky. The day would be temperate. It looked like it might rain by nightfall, which was unexpected. Was it lucky? She huddled back under her cover and took out a bottle from her bag to drink. After taking a deep sip, she screwed the cap back on and lay back down. It reminded her of hiding under the covers as a kid. Something scuttled over her, thinking she was a part of the landscape.
“Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile, the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
Are moving across the landscapes
Over the prairies and the deep cacti,
And the mountains and dunes,” she whispered.
Ximena couldn’t wrap her head around the concept of being lucky. Choosing to go on this trip should have been an indicator of her general luck. Wasn’t there a guy though whose whole thing was being lucky? It didn’t seem to help him since she recalled him sitting on the bus.
If it became colder now and rained later, it meant she’d have to work not to freeze at night. But traveling at night meant she wouldn’t be easily seen. If she had a little more luck, she thought, maybe they hadn’t even noticed she’d left.
How far had she traveled? She had been trying not to push too hard so as to hurt herself or expend so much energy that she would be useless. Using her Gift on her feet meant that it was the Gift powering them rather than her muscles and lungs, for the most part, but she could still injure herself. On and off for maybe six hours, using her Gift to power up her speed, let’s say it was taking her 6 minutes to run a mile. That would mean maybe 50 miles, wouldn’t it? But she didn’t know if any of those numbers were accurate. Maybe none of that was right -- she had no way to know.
Ximena felt tired in a way that went beyond the norm. It was like there was a chunk taken out of her chest and in her head. She had been using Raja’s jacket as a blanket again while waiting out the cold hours between dawn and noon to pass. She managed to unfasten the enamel pin of a pink, purple, and blue flag. After a few tries due to her unsteady hands, she managed to pin it onto the middle of her skirt. She sighed shakily and lay flat again on her side.
Even after everything, putting the pin on sent a small spike of fear through her. How stupid.
Stupid. Worthless. That's why nothing works out for you. That's why you can't even imagine in your wildest dreams even a single good thing happening.
A suicidal girl was hiding in the desert, clinging to life as hard as she could.
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Carrion Queen
- Posts: 427
- Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2018 6:35 am
Ximena had been laying down on her side working on her wounds. With her Gift, she had sped up the time around just the injuries. The longer she worked, the closer together and more solidly her skin and muscle reconnected. The wounds took on the time of days and although they looked jagged, they healed.
“Too high, can’t come down. Losing my head, spinnin’ round and round. Do you feel me now?” she whisper-sang to herself as she went about her task.
Why do some people get easy lives?
Why do people who have easy lives expect people with hard lives to act like them?
Oh, why don’t you smile more? You should just relax.
Oh, your name is Rodriguez? But we already have one of those. We’ll have to call you something else. The one we have already is more important than you. You’re just a girl, after all.
Just a girl.
She stuck her hand outside of her cover and with a finger, she drew a circle in the dirt. Ximena took a stick from the ground nearby and jabbed the stick into the middle of the circle. The shadow fell just slightly to the left.
It was 11 o’clock.
“Have you heard of Giftology?” asked the psychology student from TikTok.
“It’s nonsense, isn’t it? Like horoscopes and blood-type personalities. Gifts are just random; they don’t mean anything,” said Ximena.
“Mmm, maybe. The theory is that your Gift manifests as a result of being a representation of your soul. Your gift says something about your intrinsic nature.”
“Tell that to the guy who has corgis for feet.”
“Seriously, have you ever thought about why you have the Gift you do?”
Ximena lay curled up in the fetal position, hugging her knees with the blanket draped over her.
She felt like she was sinking into the sand, and she was content to sink.
I’m safe if I’m alone. I’m safe if I’m under here. I just want to be alone forever. If I try to go out, someone will hurt me. That’s all I’ve ever experienced my whole life. I should stay here alone. When I’ve invested in people, I always end up getting tossed away like trash. Everyone I’ve ever known would do the same to me eventually. Maybe I hate everyone I've ever met. I’ll just lay here until I die. I don’t want to go out.
Tears started to trail down her face.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
She spiraled down.
Let the desert take me. Please, just let this all end.
Is it possible your mind is playing tricks on you?
I just want to lay here and die. I deserve something easy for once.
She closed her eyes and was still.
A hand reached down into the abyss, removed the lid of her coffin, and linked fingers with her. Together, their linked fingers spread like claws and wiggled, making the sign for “monster.”
Even if he wasn’t here anymore, she still remembered. It broke her heart, but it was a memory she held close. And there is nothing as whole as a broken heart.
She couldn’t talk to him anymore or see him, but another person had told her that she had to promise to see him again one day and buy him water.
At the bottom of the abyss, it seemed she still cared for people despite it all, and that's not nothing. Slowly, Ximena pulled herself up from the spiral. She began to un-sink. She resurfaced and found herself laying on the dirt in the desert.
Ximena stripped her bloody tights off and threw them in the bag along with her sweater, Raja’s jacket, and the emergency blanket. Spilling just a bit of water on the ground, she was able to make some mud. She spread it over what little white remained on her bloodied camisole, her skirt, and her hair, turning it a muddy brown color like the landscape rather than black.
Finally, she stood.
And she began to walk.
She shot a blast of power to her feet and sped them up by a factor of two, giving her a brisk pace and making her look a bit like she was doing a cartoon character's fast walking animation. It was a safe amount of energy to expend for now.
How long will I walk for?
Until I’m done.
“Too high, can’t come down. Losing my head, spinnin’ round and round. Do you feel me now?” she whisper-sang to herself as she went about her task.
Why do some people get easy lives?
Why do people who have easy lives expect people with hard lives to act like them?
Oh, why don’t you smile more? You should just relax.
Oh, your name is Rodriguez? But we already have one of those. We’ll have to call you something else. The one we have already is more important than you. You’re just a girl, after all.
Just a girl.
She stuck her hand outside of her cover and with a finger, she drew a circle in the dirt. Ximena took a stick from the ground nearby and jabbed the stick into the middle of the circle. The shadow fell just slightly to the left.
It was 11 o’clock.
“Have you heard of Giftology?” asked the psychology student from TikTok.
“It’s nonsense, isn’t it? Like horoscopes and blood-type personalities. Gifts are just random; they don’t mean anything,” said Ximena.
“Mmm, maybe. The theory is that your Gift manifests as a result of being a representation of your soul. Your gift says something about your intrinsic nature.”
“Tell that to the guy who has corgis for feet.”
“Seriously, have you ever thought about why you have the Gift you do?”
Ximena lay curled up in the fetal position, hugging her knees with the blanket draped over her.
She felt like she was sinking into the sand, and she was content to sink.
I’m safe if I’m alone. I’m safe if I’m under here. I just want to be alone forever. If I try to go out, someone will hurt me. That’s all I’ve ever experienced my whole life. I should stay here alone. When I’ve invested in people, I always end up getting tossed away like trash. Everyone I’ve ever known would do the same to me eventually. Maybe I hate everyone I've ever met. I’ll just lay here until I die. I don’t want to go out.
Tears started to trail down her face.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
I don’t want to go out.
She spiraled down.
Let the desert take me. Please, just let this all end.
Is it possible your mind is playing tricks on you?
I just want to lay here and die. I deserve something easy for once.
She closed her eyes and was still.
A hand reached down into the abyss, removed the lid of her coffin, and linked fingers with her. Together, their linked fingers spread like claws and wiggled, making the sign for “monster.”
Even if he wasn’t here anymore, she still remembered. It broke her heart, but it was a memory she held close. And there is nothing as whole as a broken heart.
She couldn’t talk to him anymore or see him, but another person had told her that she had to promise to see him again one day and buy him water.
At the bottom of the abyss, it seemed she still cared for people despite it all, and that's not nothing. Slowly, Ximena pulled herself up from the spiral. She began to un-sink. She resurfaced and found herself laying on the dirt in the desert.
Ximena stripped her bloody tights off and threw them in the bag along with her sweater, Raja’s jacket, and the emergency blanket. Spilling just a bit of water on the ground, she was able to make some mud. She spread it over what little white remained on her bloodied camisole, her skirt, and her hair, turning it a muddy brown color like the landscape rather than black.
Finally, she stood.
And she began to walk.
She shot a blast of power to her feet and sped them up by a factor of two, giving her a brisk pace and making her look a bit like she was doing a cartoon character's fast walking animation. It was a safe amount of energy to expend for now.
How long will I walk for?
Until I’m done.
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Carrion Queen
- Posts: 427
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In the morning sun in the distance, she saw something, finally, that isn't the desert or the dunes.
Up ahead were two vehicles. The closer vehicle was a black sedan.
Ximena slapped herself and then stared again. Black sedan was still there. She didn't hesitate any longer. Ximena ran up to the driver's side door, which was wide open. Far in the distance, she could see an RV near a semi-trailer with a man dressed all in black outside the door of the semi. He kicked open the door.
Oh fuck no. I don't want any of that.
Ximena looked at the guy in the passenger's seat. He was unconscious. She now slapped the guy, and he didn't seem to respond. Upon closer inspection, his hands were zip-tied, and the keys were still in the ignition.
"I commandeer this car in the name of fuck you, it's an emergency."
She leaned in with her knees on the driver's seat, opened the passenger's side door, shoved the guy out, and closed the door. Ximena then tossed her bag into the passenger's seat and turned the keys.
The gas tank was full.
"I gotta go pick up my people," she said, slamming the door shut, throwing the seatbelt on, and jamming her foot on the gas.
((Ximena Rodriquez continued in For Everyone ))
Up ahead were two vehicles. The closer vehicle was a black sedan.
Ximena slapped herself and then stared again. Black sedan was still there. She didn't hesitate any longer. Ximena ran up to the driver's side door, which was wide open. Far in the distance, she could see an RV near a semi-trailer with a man dressed all in black outside the door of the semi. He kicked open the door.
Oh fuck no. I don't want any of that.
Ximena looked at the guy in the passenger's seat. He was unconscious. She now slapped the guy, and he didn't seem to respond. Upon closer inspection, his hands were zip-tied, and the keys were still in the ignition.
"I commandeer this car in the name of fuck you, it's an emergency."
She leaned in with her knees on the driver's seat, opened the passenger's side door, shoved the guy out, and closed the door. Ximena then tossed her bag into the passenger's seat and turned the keys.
The gas tank was full.
"I gotta go pick up my people," she said, slamming the door shut, throwing the seatbelt on, and jamming her foot on the gas.
((Ximena Rodriquez continued in For Everyone ))