Gyu-ri had a knack for telling when people were looking at her in the not quite way. It was a gift inherent to her tendency to look people square in the eye- not necessarily because she wanted to but because she was obligated. The magnetic allure of symmetrical interactions. Asymmetric as this conversation was, she still leaned into it with the same earnestness as any other.
"Of course..! I can't say I'm confident I did my best, but I'll always try to make myself- as it were. Available to you."
Now that was just par for the course, wherein, Gyu-ri offered her time and energy to another as a reflexive slip of the tongue and signed a social contract in her own viscera: her blood, her sweat, her tears, the inevitable burnout and social shame of her overly taut violin string synapses discordantly snapping in the presence of someone who happened to sneeze too loud and imply the reach of their own projectile germs.
"Any time, please. Don't be a stranger."
But, for Jon she realized at the very least that he was the last person on earth who'd take advantage of another's help. No matter how much he needed it. Poor Jiji. She did try her best. Gyu-ri, as elder sister, knew she needed to do the same.
There was just something about him. Simple worthiness, like the honest loam of the earth. Infuriatingly intangible, but she was alright with that.
"Though, maybe I'm being too friendly."
Their connection had to be at least somewhat more substantial, right? She could grope for a topic, but for once she spoke just ahead of herself to outpace the entropy of doubt.
"A more innocuous topic- do you, uh. Have prom plans, per chance?" No, she didn't hear the clumsiness of her own tone, how the lilt implied some form of implicit embarrassment. Too girlish. Now the possibility occurred to her, of course, one possibility of many's worth of her own social incompetence, but she for once was just comfortable enough to assume she hadn't been completely shooting herself in her own foot. She felt at least reasonably solid-footed, for once. Nothing to be knocked down off of.
Death With Dignity
man, this is the only sufjan song i've actually listened to, i'm such a fake music fan (private)
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Yugikun
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“Okay, um. I will. I’ll try to be, at least.”
That was in regard to not being a stranger. Honestly he wasn’t sure whether he’d even gone into the topic of the stuff with his mom as much as he really wanted to but he wasn’t planning on pushing it any further. That part of the conversation was over, Gyu-ri was moving on, and if Jonathan wanted to talk more about it (which… yeah, he did) he could either talk it with Jiji when she came back or text/message Gyu-ri about it later if he had any way of contacting her (which… yeah, he imagined he did?).
Point was, now they were talking about prom, which… was going to make this conversation slightly awkward given that he was talking to Jiji’s sister and not Jiji herself. Probably not a kosher thing to do to go ‘hey, I’m gonna invite your sister out to prom’ so he kinda had to do this carefully. Be low-key about it. Mask what he was actually doing, and stuff.
Well, hopefully. Wouldn’t know if he’d do it well unless he tried, so…
“Yeah. Prom, um…”
At least he probably wouldn’t fall lower than this.
“Iunno. Meant to talk to Jiji about all the stuff with my mother and ended up talking to you about it instead, so I guess now I’m going to invite you out to prom?”
…
…
Jonathan stood corrected.
That was in regard to not being a stranger. Honestly he wasn’t sure whether he’d even gone into the topic of the stuff with his mom as much as he really wanted to but he wasn’t planning on pushing it any further. That part of the conversation was over, Gyu-ri was moving on, and if Jonathan wanted to talk more about it (which… yeah, he did) he could either talk it with Jiji when she came back or text/message Gyu-ri about it later if he had any way of contacting her (which… yeah, he imagined he did?).
Point was, now they were talking about prom, which… was going to make this conversation slightly awkward given that he was talking to Jiji’s sister and not Jiji herself. Probably not a kosher thing to do to go ‘hey, I’m gonna invite your sister out to prom’ so he kinda had to do this carefully. Be low-key about it. Mask what he was actually doing, and stuff.
Well, hopefully. Wouldn’t know if he’d do it well unless he tried, so…
“Yeah. Prom, um…”
At least he probably wouldn’t fall lower than this.
“Iunno. Meant to talk to Jiji about all the stuff with my mother and ended up talking to you about it instead, so I guess now I’m going to invite you out to prom?”
…
…
Jonathan stood corrected.
Immediately after she'd closed her apishly gaping open mouth she'd realized she'd closed one awkwardly shaped door of conversation and merely run across the hall into the next badly thought out topic. This time on purpose, this time to her own personal detriment, and furthermore-
The usual internalized spiel fell apart, Jon had just asked her out to prom.
"Ah."
Her brain was loud, as it was wont, but the usual triplicate chatter was for once indistinct in it's being irrelevant. It was still loud, it was never not so. But in that moment in space and time where she was all too ridiculously aware of her precise coordinates to the degree and decimal to some amount of places... she didn't know? She honestly did not. Normally when she was surprised by a question her brain could come up with all the possible responses and pick the precisely wrong one from them. In this particular novelty's worth of an instance she had none of the responses.
And of course would still pick the wrong one, that never stopped being a thing.
"If that's your intent..."
How did she play it off, and what was she even playing off, and did any of her questions actually matter when this might well have been a matter of the heart and soul? Was this the time to actually try and think it through, as she was supposed to be able to all the time to her detriment? She should have been able to- that she couldn't was. Well. Liberating? Maybe. Probably not.
"I'd be willing."
Was that liberation? She smiled, and didn't know if she had intended to or not as she held out a dainty hand and offered it to him palm up. Both of them still standing, just enough space between them that she could stand to be pulled closer. And no, she did not know if she was really okay with that- but fuck it all she never would know and she was willing to just put that fact aside for this lapse of all her overstrung judgement called a moment in time.
The usual internalized spiel fell apart, Jon had just asked her out to prom.
"Ah."
Her brain was loud, as it was wont, but the usual triplicate chatter was for once indistinct in it's being irrelevant. It was still loud, it was never not so. But in that moment in space and time where she was all too ridiculously aware of her precise coordinates to the degree and decimal to some amount of places... she didn't know? She honestly did not. Normally when she was surprised by a question her brain could come up with all the possible responses and pick the precisely wrong one from them. In this particular novelty's worth of an instance she had none of the responses.
And of course would still pick the wrong one, that never stopped being a thing.
"If that's your intent..."
How did she play it off, and what was she even playing off, and did any of her questions actually matter when this might well have been a matter of the heart and soul? Was this the time to actually try and think it through, as she was supposed to be able to all the time to her detriment? She should have been able to- that she couldn't was. Well. Liberating? Maybe. Probably not.
"I'd be willing."
Was that liberation? She smiled, and didn't know if she had intended to or not as she held out a dainty hand and offered it to him palm up. Both of them still standing, just enough space between them that she could stand to be pulled closer. And no, she did not know if she was really okay with that- but fuck it all she never would know and she was willing to just put that fact aside for this lapse of all her overstrung judgement called a moment in time.
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