Hazel rubbed her hands over her bare arms as Jae spoke, her displeasure at the situation he described etched clearly across her features. Henry wasn't someone she tended to interact with on more than a cursory level, but he and Jae were closer than she'd ever seen two boys be. From the stories Jae had told her and the moments she and Henry had spoken in person, he'd only ever given her the impression of being a sweet – if slightly out-there (and honestly, who wasn't) – guy. The idea of some girl taking advantage of him for some weird thrill just didn't sit well with her.
"Ah, I get it. And that's shit, honestly. I'd be happy to help you out if you needed anything." She pulled her hair over her shoulders; a nervous tick she'd developed that arose whenever she tread dangerous waters, and one that refused to leave, no matter how much she tried to squash the habit. "Who's he going with again?"
And then Jae asked whether she was going, and suddenly the opportunity she was hoping for was presented to her on a silver platter. His question was the perfect segue into the area of discussion she was hoping they'd travel down once she'd dropped the topic into the conversational pool. Sadie Hawkins didn't have the prestige and memorability of prom, but it put her in a unique position that no other big school event did: she could be the asker. It wasn't as though that was outlawed with any other dance, but it came with a stigma that she was none too eager to embrace – especially with her past reputation still out and about.
She contemplated bursting into a flood of explanations, saying that it didn't have to mean anything, that it could just be as friends, that she didn't have anybody else she wanted to go with as much as him – they all swirled around in her head like some torrential whirlpool. But as clarity returned to her mind, she realised that she'd better be served not by a deluge of harried, defensive words in case of rejection, but by a direct and to the point question. She was used to nerves before a performance, but they always seemed to disappear the second she was on the stage – if anything, they made it stronger. Why should asking Jae be any different?
"Yeah, I am, actually. And speaking of... I was wondering if maybe you'd like to go with me?"
Bittersweet and Sour
Tagging SansaSaver!
"Scarlett McAfee." Yep, that tasted like a name he could learn to hate. "She's in our year, but I don't think I've ever talked to her. Know anything about her?" Hazel was much more of a social butterfly than Jae, so odds were better that she'd had some kind of experience with Scarlett before. Jae took one final drag from his dwindling cigarette and dropped it to the ground, grinding it out with the heel of his boot. Hazel had already come to his rescue at least once today; who was to say she wouldn't do it again?
Before he could dwell too much on that, though, Hazel went and asked the million dollar question. Or something. Was it really a million dollar question if you weren't getting a prize? Unless of course the prize was Jae himself, which let's face it, was a pretty niche reward.
Then again, that seemed to be exactly what Hazel was angling for.
"Together? Like a... a thing?" Wait, shit, that made it sound bad. Hazel had been "a thing" with a lot of guys, and he knew that was a sore spot for her. "I mean, not- Fuck. You know what, ignore that, it doesn't matter." Jae waved his hands like he could dissipate what he'd just said like his cigarette smoke. "But, uh, yeah. I-I mean, I'd like that." Shit, he was stuttering now. He never stuttered, what was wrong with him? Hazel had most definitely not decided to ask him out because she expected him to turn into a stuttering mess.
...Asked him to the dance. Not asked him out. Different things. He was getting all worked up over nothing.
"Um. Sorry about that, again. I dunno what's wrong with me today, you know, it's just been a long week and-" Goddamn it. Give her a straight answer.
Jae closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, look. I'm making an ass of myself here, but... yeah. I'd like to go with you. That sounds like fun." There. Was that so hard? His heart was still beating fast, but it kind of felt like a good thing. Like a risk that had paid off, even though he hadn't been the one to pop the question in the first place.
"Fair warning though: my parents are going to take, just, all of the pictures. They go nuts when I actually go and do things with people."
Before he could dwell too much on that, though, Hazel went and asked the million dollar question. Or something. Was it really a million dollar question if you weren't getting a prize? Unless of course the prize was Jae himself, which let's face it, was a pretty niche reward.
Then again, that seemed to be exactly what Hazel was angling for.
"Together? Like a... a thing?" Wait, shit, that made it sound bad. Hazel had been "a thing" with a lot of guys, and he knew that was a sore spot for her. "I mean, not- Fuck. You know what, ignore that, it doesn't matter." Jae waved his hands like he could dissipate what he'd just said like his cigarette smoke. "But, uh, yeah. I-I mean, I'd like that." Shit, he was stuttering now. He never stuttered, what was wrong with him? Hazel had most definitely not decided to ask him out because she expected him to turn into a stuttering mess.
...Asked him to the dance. Not asked him out. Different things. He was getting all worked up over nothing.
"Um. Sorry about that, again. I dunno what's wrong with me today, you know, it's just been a long week and-" Goddamn it. Give her a straight answer.
Jae closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, look. I'm making an ass of myself here, but... yeah. I'd like to go with you. That sounds like fun." There. Was that so hard? His heart was still beating fast, but it kind of felt like a good thing. Like a risk that had paid off, even though he hadn't been the one to pop the question in the first place.
"Fair warning though: my parents are going to take, just, all of the pictures. They go nuts when I actually go and do things with people."
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."
Scarlett McAfee was almost a complete non-entity to Hazel, but answering to Jae's inquiry about her with a Mariah Carey-esque "I don't know her" would be entirely unhelpful and not a route she was keen to take. However, given what she knew about Scarlett's questionable music tastes, maybe emulating the pop diva would be an appropriate response – were this not a serious discussion over the dangerous nature of Jae's best friend's date. Instead, she wracked her brain for the handful of facts she could pull out about the fellow senior.
"I don't know much about her personality," she replied, recalling their brief interactions as pleasant, but nowhere near a good enough gauge of her psyche. "She takes tap at the same place I do dance, and I know she listens to like, 2000s music, but that sums it up, really."
The Scarlett Dilemma found itself overshadowed somewhat by Jae's reply to her invitation to Sadie Hawkins. As Jae stammered over his words, the ball of nerves twisting within her chest threatened to plummet violently down to the very pit of her stomach. Regrets were already beginning to worm their way in, accelerated by Jae's reference to them going as 'a thing'. There were plenty of boys in the past who'd thought of her as just that, and such unpleasant memories weren't exactly welcome when her brain was already overwhelmed by the precarious position she'd placed her friendship in.
Then Jae found himself articulate once more, and the harried half-sentences and seconds of anxiety all paid off when he said the magic words. It wasn't a poetic declaration, but there was more thought and genuineness in it than she'd been given in past instances of her and another boy going out. Too often they'd woo her as best they could, and once she'd let herself get in too deep then all that romantic façade would fade away and what they'd wanted from the start would make itself known.
In a way, it almost felt like the situations had been reversed – she was doing the asking, helping Jae out when he needed it. It was an uncomfortable thought, and she briefly entertained the notion of being wholly honest with him – spilling out her feelings and telling him that friendship was great but in an ideal world it wouldn't just be friendship – making sure that all the cards were on the table, with no room for doubt from either party.
But she was frightened, and her asking Jae seemed to drain so much from him when he was already under stress; going further would just be selfish. And for now, being able to go to the school dance with the best possible date? That would be enough.
Hazel hadn't realised that she'd clasped her hands together in her moment of panic. It wasn't until she let her body unwind that she noticed her fingernails were digging sharply into her skin, leaving deep grooves in their wake. She found herself struggling to manage a reply to Jae's agreement, almost audibly sighing in relief when he forewarned her about his parents' penchant for photography.
"I'm one hundred percent down for all the pictures," Hazel said, running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to return to a cool demeanour. "I like to think of it as practice for the paparazzi." She finished, hoping the joke landed in the right spot to break the lingering tension she could feel winding around them.
"I don't know much about her personality," she replied, recalling their brief interactions as pleasant, but nowhere near a good enough gauge of her psyche. "She takes tap at the same place I do dance, and I know she listens to like, 2000s music, but that sums it up, really."
The Scarlett Dilemma found itself overshadowed somewhat by Jae's reply to her invitation to Sadie Hawkins. As Jae stammered over his words, the ball of nerves twisting within her chest threatened to plummet violently down to the very pit of her stomach. Regrets were already beginning to worm their way in, accelerated by Jae's reference to them going as 'a thing'. There were plenty of boys in the past who'd thought of her as just that, and such unpleasant memories weren't exactly welcome when her brain was already overwhelmed by the precarious position she'd placed her friendship in.
Then Jae found himself articulate once more, and the harried half-sentences and seconds of anxiety all paid off when he said the magic words. It wasn't a poetic declaration, but there was more thought and genuineness in it than she'd been given in past instances of her and another boy going out. Too often they'd woo her as best they could, and once she'd let herself get in too deep then all that romantic façade would fade away and what they'd wanted from the start would make itself known.
In a way, it almost felt like the situations had been reversed – she was doing the asking, helping Jae out when he needed it. It was an uncomfortable thought, and she briefly entertained the notion of being wholly honest with him – spilling out her feelings and telling him that friendship was great but in an ideal world it wouldn't just be friendship – making sure that all the cards were on the table, with no room for doubt from either party.
But she was frightened, and her asking Jae seemed to drain so much from him when he was already under stress; going further would just be selfish. And for now, being able to go to the school dance with the best possible date? That would be enough.
Hazel hadn't realised that she'd clasped her hands together in her moment of panic. It wasn't until she let her body unwind that she noticed her fingernails were digging sharply into her skin, leaving deep grooves in their wake. She found herself struggling to manage a reply to Jae's agreement, almost audibly sighing in relief when he forewarned her about his parents' penchant for photography.
"I'm one hundred percent down for all the pictures," Hazel said, running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to return to a cool demeanour. "I like to think of it as practice for the paparazzi." She finished, hoping the joke landed in the right spot to break the lingering tension she could feel winding around them.
"Heh." Jae's laugh was barely more than an exhalation of his remaining tension, but it was a laugh, and it was genuine. "I think my parents are a little better than the paparazzi, at least. They'll make sure all the pictures are decent."
He felt... how did he feel? The pain behind his eye that had been threatening to become a full-blown headache had mostly receded. His heart rate seemed more or less back to normal. His hands weren't shaking anymore, from withdrawal or nerves.
He supposed that he felt good. Just good. Content, maybe. It had been a while since he'd felt that way.
"Thanks," he said, not entirely knowing what he was thanking Hazel for. She deserved his thanks for a lot of things, probably. For giving him a chance again and again, for being someone he could rely on when he needed it. For... all of this, whatever it might turn out to be.
Jae leaned forward for a moment, resting his elbows on his knees. He didn't say anything else for a bit, wanting to just snapshot this moment in his mind and preserve it. He felt good. Things were going to be okay. Whatever had been bothering him, it wasn't forever. He'd needed a good friend - maybe something more, but a good friend above all else - to remind him of that.
He closed his eyes briefly and exhaled once again before looking at Hazel. "We can talk about it later, if you want. We should probably go and actually look at that homework, and I think I'm going to start getting all mushy if I'm allowed to just think about things any longer. I don't think you want to deal with that right now." He gave her a lopsided smile before standing and offering her a hand up.
Even algebra homework didn't loom quite so forbiddingly over his head when he was in good company.
((Min-jae Parker continued in Hell is Other People))
He felt... how did he feel? The pain behind his eye that had been threatening to become a full-blown headache had mostly receded. His heart rate seemed more or less back to normal. His hands weren't shaking anymore, from withdrawal or nerves.
He supposed that he felt good. Just good. Content, maybe. It had been a while since he'd felt that way.
"Thanks," he said, not entirely knowing what he was thanking Hazel for. She deserved his thanks for a lot of things, probably. For giving him a chance again and again, for being someone he could rely on when he needed it. For... all of this, whatever it might turn out to be.
Jae leaned forward for a moment, resting his elbows on his knees. He didn't say anything else for a bit, wanting to just snapshot this moment in his mind and preserve it. He felt good. Things were going to be okay. Whatever had been bothering him, it wasn't forever. He'd needed a good friend - maybe something more, but a good friend above all else - to remind him of that.
He closed his eyes briefly and exhaled once again before looking at Hazel. "We can talk about it later, if you want. We should probably go and actually look at that homework, and I think I'm going to start getting all mushy if I'm allowed to just think about things any longer. I don't think you want to deal with that right now." He gave her a lopsided smile before standing and offering her a hand up.
Even algebra homework didn't loom quite so forbiddingly over his head when he was in good company.
((Min-jae Parker continued in Hell is Other People))
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."