Hellbound Hearts

[MurderWeasel]

Before she knew what was happening, Darlene was on the ground. She landed on her rear with what felt like a lot of force but there was so much ivy and grass and old loose soil that it didn't hurt, the twigs and leaves just scratched at her some. What hurt was looking up at Jonah.

Darlene's eyes were wide as she took in the blood, but only for a moment. There only was a moment. Then he was diving at Michael, yelling at her to go, to run. Find Arizona. Go. Meet in an hour.

It took Darlene a moment to process, and in that moment all she could think was: Jonah wouldn't want me to leave a friend. That was how she'd worked for the past few days, how she'd handled difficult situations or cases where her conscience wasn't up to the task alone. She imagined what Jonah would want or do and then she acted on it (or else felt guilty for ignoring it), and Jonah wouldn't leave a friend behind. So obviously Darlene shouldn't either, right? She should pop straight back up and start shooting and screaming because that might drive Michael off, or else maybe take him with her.

Except, Jonah was right here, telling her what he wanted, and that was for her to go.

Tears were streaming from Darlene's eyes as she scrambled back upright, the vines tugging at her hands and feet, grabbing for the gun, trying to trip her or steal what little she had left. The bag, so light now, still kept her off-center. She nearly went down even as she backed away, gaze locked on Jonah as he grappled with Michael.

She wanted nothing more than to stay and throw herself at this with everything she had left, to let this be the end if that's what it came to. What else was there? Max was gone, guarded by the dog. Lucas and Kelly and Stephanie were gone, cast aside and abandoned. It was just Jonah now, and Darlene could still see the sunburst of blood.

She wasn't an idiot. She knew she'd be alone in an hour.

Everything was shaking, Darlene and the world around her, but she couldn't take her gaze off Jonah.

What would—what did—Jonah want?

She gave a tiny wave, then turned and bolted.

((Darlene Silva continued in What Do I Hear, What Do I Hear?))

[Kermit]

Arms crushing him. He blinked. He blinked again. Kept blinking. Jonah? Arizona. Quinn. Quinn'd spared him because he was too pathetic to be worth killing. Jonah wrapping around him. Where was Darlene? Had he shot her? Didn't know. Didn't remember. He couldn't think of a reason why Darlene would have lied about what she'd done (though maybe he could, deep, deep down). Beryl had asked her to kill her. Beryl had never really been okay. He'd fallen in love with her mask.

And, in that moment, he finally fucking let her go.

And now, he well and truly had nothing left to lose.

Autopilot brain. Jonah was either giving him a hug or trying to kill him and he wasn't sure which but they'd both elicit the same reaction from him anyways so

He fumbled his arms around, blindly letting the gun fall to the ground. Wordlessly enveloped Jonah, holding on for dear life. Stared blankly, eyes glazed, over the boy's shoulder.

There was a wet patch growing on his shirt. He could feel it starting to seep into his skin.

[Ruggahissy]

Jonah glanced behind him and saw Darlene give him one more look before going off.

"I know I won't see you in an hour," she said when she looked at him. He tried his best to look at her in a way that said yes, he would. He would see her in an hour, he said with a deceitful smile. She left and Jonah could finally breathe, or at least try to. It was getting harder. He was starting to get light-headed, which dulled the searing pain of being shot somewhat.

Michael moved jerkily and then embraced him back, looking over his shoulder where Darlene had retreated. Jonah hugged him as best he could, which felt a bit different than trying to restrain him. His hands reached around to support Michael's torso.

"I'm not that upset, he said. "I'm a little upset, but not that mad. Kind of disappointed," he said a hint of levity entering his voice: a dad joke. He moved back and bumped his head against Michael's. It was the gesture Abel had done with him when he came to visit Jonah after he passed out during their final junior year baseball game. He knew that there was something wrong and Jonah lied to him and told him he was tired. He wouldn't tell Abel about his illness. He patted Michael's back weakly, like Darlene had done for him when Abel died.

He would be honest starting now.

[Kermit]

Michael felt his eyes starting to close tight. Ugly crying. Shakily exhaled through his nose. Shuddered in with his mouth. Didn't move from the embrace.

"A-Are you okay with it -" he choked, "Is it - is it okay?"

He didn't want Jonah to go.

[Ruggahissy]

Jonah felt his legs start to lose feeling. He pushed his forehead against Michael's and let go. He tried to gently lay down, but ended up more falling and landed in a patch of the ivy.

That was better. He was nauseous and getting colder while his wounds burned, but this was a little better.

"I've had time," Jonah said looking up. "When I was a little kid I got dumped and then the best family ever took me in. Last year I got really sick and I thought about dying a lot then too. When I woke up here I just thought, 'It's finally come back for me.' Like it's Final Destination or something. I've been playing with house money for a long time. It's hard to be too mad when you lose house money."

The feeling in his body was starting to fade. It started at his fingers and toes and the numbness was creeping up. Around him, the cool ivy framed his face.

"Arizona tried to make me less reckless. She loves me," he said going starry-eyed. "We fit our whole lives together inside of a few days. Her love is very fierce..." he said a bit dreamily. He wondered whether or not to tell Michael he'd be dead by dawn. The two inevitables in Michael's life were now Arizona and taxes.

"Is that how it was with Beryl too?"

[Kermit]

Jonah fell, and Michael almost fell too, but he let go before he could. Standing didn't really feel like the proper thing to do, so he slowly bent down and sat on one of the rocks, holding his head in his hands.

"No," he pushed his sunglasses off, and let them fall to the ground. Tears trailed from his eyes down to the tip of his nose, and pattered against the ivy. "No, it wasn't like that with Beryl."

He sniffled a little bit and looked down at the boy's face.

"I-I'm glad you found a way to be at peace with - with being not-dead, though."

[Ruggahissy]

"I always was," he said reaching up to take Michael's hand from his seated position on the nearby rock. Michael felt very warm. He was almost too warm. His hand burned Jonah.

"You're Michael. You want to be a marine biologist. You like squiggly ocean things."

It was hard to think now. Jonah had said to Arizona that he aimed to do everything he did coming from a place of love. As long as he followed that principle, he couldn't be led astray. So that's how he'd die too. Michael had tried to kill Darlene and he couldn't let that happen. But he could feel Michael's pain. He would use the last energy he had trying to reach out to him. Jonah had meant when he said that it wasn't too late. As long as they were alive, it's not too late. He had a few more minutes still.

"Describe your favorite ocean thing, please," he said quietly with his eyes closed. "I don't know that much about them. I'd like to learn."

[Kermit]

"O-Okay," he scratched the back of his neck and looked down at his feet. The blood-soaked section of his shirt stuck uncomfortably to his chest.

"Ctenophores-" he was so fucking scared "- Ctenophores were pretty cool, I guess," he cleared his throat. It felt kind of like one of his lungs was filling with water. That probably wasn't good. "They, uh, had some at the - the aquarium. A lot of people say they're jellyfish, but they aren't. We don't really know where they fit in the tree of life, only that they branched off pretty early. They, um, look kind of like spaceships, and have these little wavey rainbow cilia things that they use to, uh, move. Even though they're kinda harmless-looking, they're all predatory. In the, uh, Mediterranian — I think — they had a population boom because of ocean acidification, and so, like, they were eating everything else in the ocean — but then, ecologists introduced a kind of ctenophore to the environment — Beroida, I think they're called — that predated on only other kinds ctenophores, and-"

He cut himself off. Something felt different, all of a sudden. He couldn't put his finger exactly on what. He glanced back at Jonah's eyes, which had closed since the last time he'd looked. He squeezed his hand tight. Didn't think to try and feel if he still had a pulse.

"Jo-Jonah? Are you... are you still there?" his voice broke.

[Ruggahissy]

"They're harmless looking but dangerous," he repeated, listening with his eyes closed. He opened his eyes halfway to look pointedly at Michael. "No wonder you like them," he said, smiling wryly. "I'm sorry, that was kind of a mean joke."

He felt like he was floating now. His thoughts were cloudy as the blood ran out of him and saturated the ivy and flowers around him. The plants comforted and cradled him; they made up for the color that had drained from his skin.

"They sound magical," he said, closing his eyes again. Tears spilled over, trailing down the sides of his face.

"They sound like something from a dream."

Jonah didn't want to leave Michael. He didn't want to leave someone who needed help. He didn't want to leave everyone who still needed help and care. It wasn't fair that people had given him so much and he didn't have the chance to give it all back.

"Thank you for sharing that. I love that you found sometime so beautiful where most people wouldn't look."

His fingers started to lose their grip on Michael's hand.

"Beauty is in everything if you really look. At least, I think so," he said very quietly. He opened his eyes and Michael was starting to blur and all of the colors of Michael ran together. Even as his malfunctioning brain struggled to process the image in front of him, he thought it was kind of beautiful too.

"Even dying."

He tried to keep his eyes open as long as he could, struggling to keep awareness. The hourglass of his life had only a few grains of sand left.

"I'll be okay."

The darkness encroaching on the edges of his watercolor vision of Michael and the garden grew inward until only a pinhole of shining light was left. It sparkled brilliantly and then was snuffed out like a faraway star. It was dazzling even to the very last second.

Jonah Heartgrave - Deceased

[Kermit]

Michael softly lowered Jonah's hand to the ground. Then, he collapsed forward in a heap, letting everything he'd been penning up inside for the past week spill out. He screamed and cried silently, laying on the ground next to Jonah for what felt like hours but what couldn't have been more than minutes. The tears dried up. The feelings didn't.

Slowly, he brought himself to his feet. He bent over, pushing Jonah's eyelids closed with the back of his hand. Then, he crossed the boy's arms over his chest. It was disconcerting, how alive his skin still felt.

He shuffled over to a bush covered in pale white rose-looking flowers. Not the kind of plant he really expected to find on a tropical island. He plucked two big ones, and went back over to Jonah. Wordlessly, he placed them over the boy's eyes. Then, he found a bunch of red lilies, tied them together with a long, thick strand of bright green grass, and put them under Jonah's hands, so that they were being clutched close to his heart. He hoped the red and green colour scheme would help comfort Darlene.

He placed his bag on the ground, and pulled out the Many-Eyed Bear. He placed it next to Jonah, sitting it upright against the side of his torso. He snapped the dildo out of its grasp, and chucked the lewd object into the jungle as hard as he could. He picked his sunglasses up off of the forest floor, and placed them onto the bear's gunshot-perforated head. He wondered if the bear had a full-body pair of sunglasses, so that it could cover all its eyes. Then, he remembered the bear was a plush animal, and that plush animals didn't have sunglasses. He felt kind of silly.

"...Just so you have someone to keep you company until Darlene's back," he muttered to Jonah.

Something gold and shiny glinted in the corner of his eye. He turned his head to look at it.

...oh, huh. That was... a golden deagle? Straight outta Garry's Mod.

Okay then.

He sauntered over, picked it up, and dropped it into his backpack. Made sure the safety was on. Grabbed the ammo from Jonah's pack. Put it in the same place as the deagle. He figured he'd take better care of it than Darlene would. Grabbed Adam Dodd's gun. Snapped the safety on. Put it in his pocket.

He took one last glance down at Jonah.

"I think... I think I'll be okay too now."

He sniffled.

"Thank you for everything. It... it helped."

Then, he walked away. He didn't run away. There was a very important difference.