"We're probably gonna get A's in everything!" Felicia laughed, only to find the laughter felt hollow. In one sense, it was highly likely that the teachers would cater to all the survivors like that; who the hell would fail a student who was emotionally torn to the point they might off themselves on a bad grade? Even if they just sat there in class doing nothing for the rest of the year, they'd just end up spending all their time in the guidance counsellor's office or something and get a by or... or something. Felicia wasn't really sure how these things worked, seeing as she had never been kidnapped and forced to kill people before. That kind of thing wasn't exactly a common occurence.
"Okay, no. I don't think I'm ready to joke about that," she rescinded, crossing her arms over her chest and looking down. "I mean... augh, sorry. I'm not trying to be a downer right now Ray, I just... it's hard thinking about going back now. It really is. I can pretend I have everything figured out, but I don't."
Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
Hospital-Ray and Felicia
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MK Kilmarnock
- Posts: 1931
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2018 5:28 am
- Location: On one of the coasts, generally
Ray let his own eyes drop. It was too soon. It was all too soon. And she was right. Going back was hard. He was sure his conscience wasn't free of the dirt of it.
Had he wanted to actually kill anyone?
Tensed, poised with a spear pointed business end at Rachel Getty's heart.
He was hoping he hadn't.
Standing over a prone Jimmy Brennan, a shotgun locked and loaded.
Did he really deserve to go back if he did?
Sobbing into Annaliese's shoulder, wracked with sadness and torn with hatred for a certain someone.
It took a minute for Ray to realize he had zoned out. He shook his head, came back to himself.
"Don't think any of us have it figured out." He drummed his fingers on the table, trying to think of the right thing to say. "Think we're just winging it right now."
He put a hand on the back of Felicia's palm. "We can do it."
He didn't know exactly how much of the truth he was telling. But it felt good to say it.
Had he wanted to actually kill anyone?
Tensed, poised with a spear pointed business end at Rachel Getty's heart.
He was hoping he hadn't.
Standing over a prone Jimmy Brennan, a shotgun locked and loaded.
Did he really deserve to go back if he did?
Sobbing into Annaliese's shoulder, wracked with sadness and torn with hatred for a certain someone.
It took a minute for Ray to realize he had zoned out. He shook his head, came back to himself.
"Don't think any of us have it figured out." He drummed his fingers on the table, trying to think of the right thing to say. "Think we're just winging it right now."
He put a hand on the back of Felicia's palm. "We can do it."
He didn't know exactly how much of the truth he was telling. But it felt good to say it.
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MK Kilmarnock
- Posts: 1931
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2018 5:28 am
- Location: On one of the coasts, generally
There were certain truths to this world that Felicia, both as a person and an aspiring lawyer, sought to find and had yet to actually do so. The way society came together and weaved in and out, forming a network from its own being, it should have at least tried to make sense of its own construction. This only made everything hit her that much harder when the world decided to turn itself upside down and drop on her shoulders, pressing down with all of its weight and allowing her no time to recover or think.
She couldn't make sense of this. There was no making sense of any of this, and that was just something she was going to have to live with. The trouble was, how?
Ray had given her the answer, whether he had meant to or not. Somehow, paradoxically, by being unsure in his own chances of success, she was able to feel better. If she were in a clearer state of mind, maybe she could reason her way through it. Perhaps the witness, Ms. Felicia Carmichael, would be able to give some sort of testimony about how thanks to Ray's own lack of confidence, it let her know that she didn't have to have it all together. And because she didn't have to, she didn't feel pressured about not knowing any better. But, of course, Felicia wasn't thinking quite that high.
Right now, she was just hugging Ray across the table, because it felt right. She didn't need to know anything else.
"R-Right... we just... go."
She couldn't make sense of this. There was no making sense of any of this, and that was just something she was going to have to live with. The trouble was, how?
Ray had given her the answer, whether he had meant to or not. Somehow, paradoxically, by being unsure in his own chances of success, she was able to feel better. If she were in a clearer state of mind, maybe she could reason her way through it. Perhaps the witness, Ms. Felicia Carmichael, would be able to give some sort of testimony about how thanks to Ray's own lack of confidence, it let her know that she didn't have to have it all together. And because she didn't have to, she didn't feel pressured about not knowing any better. But, of course, Felicia wasn't thinking quite that high.
Right now, she was just hugging Ray across the table, because it felt right. She didn't need to know anything else.
"R-Right... we just... go."
Ray let his hands drop back to the table. He was wondering if it was time to actually go get some food now. He could see a couple people grabbing some food from the line. Some of it even looked edible. Still, he didn't think he was really that hungry. The conversation had filled his belly with dread, and that was enough for now. Dread didn't taste good, but it was filling.
"Besides," he said, leaning back in his chair. "If you need anything, I'ma give you my phone number. And my door's open. I'll be around for you if..." He raised his finger.
"You'll be around for me. Cool?"
"Besides," he said, leaning back in his chair. "If you need anything, I'ma give you my phone number. And my door's open. I'll be around for you if..." He raised his finger.
"You'll be around for me. Cool?"
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MK Kilmarnock
- Posts: 1931
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2018 5:28 am
- Location: On one of the coasts, generally
Felicia nodded, a smile creeping back onto her face.
"Yeah. That's cool."
Her stomach growled, confirming her suspicions about just what it was her body wanted. Food did sound good right about now, and maybe after they get a few bites to eat they could continue talking. The two of them could talk later some more, too... that's what the phone was for.
"How long do you plan on staying around St. Paul?" Felicia asked, readying herself to get up. "Just for the record. I just... talking to you is going to be helpful, I think. Later."
"Yeah. That's cool."
Her stomach growled, confirming her suspicions about just what it was her body wanted. Food did sound good right about now, and maybe after they get a few bites to eat they could continue talking. The two of them could talk later some more, too... that's what the phone was for.
"How long do you plan on staying around St. Paul?" Felicia asked, readying herself to get up. "Just for the record. I just... talking to you is going to be helpful, I think. Later."
Ray wasn't hungry, but from the way her stomach was talking it was apparent Felicia was. He pushed himself up to his feet.
"C'mon. Food."
He headed over to the food line with Felicia in tow when she asked him about his prospects. He smiled.
"Awhile, I think. I don't got any ideas about going away to college." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully while he stared at the food. He was sure some of it stared back. "Thought I'd hang around, help around the house. My sister still might need me."
He wasn't really kidding himself. Alicia was doing fine; far better than him. He doubted she'd need him after awhile. The thought stung.
Ray selected a bread roll from one of the trays set up for diners, figuring he didn't have to worry about it not being cooked.
"So if you need me, I'll be around." He said.
"C'mon. Food."
He headed over to the food line with Felicia in tow when she asked him about his prospects. He smiled.
"Awhile, I think. I don't got any ideas about going away to college." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully while he stared at the food. He was sure some of it stared back. "Thought I'd hang around, help around the house. My sister still might need me."
He wasn't really kidding himself. Alicia was doing fine; far better than him. He doubted she'd need him after awhile. The thought stung.
Ray selected a bread roll from one of the trays set up for diners, figuring he didn't have to worry about it not being cooked.
"So if you need me, I'll be around." He said.