Are You Coming Home, Love MOM

[Pippi]

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A sigh left Darius St. Ledger's lips, and he leaned back in his chair, staring at his laptop with a blank expression. He looked a state; his eyes were red and puffy, and there were bags under them. Darius yawned, rubbed his right eye, and checked the time in the bottom right hand corner of the screen. Just past 8 o'clock. He'd been sitting there for the last three hours.

Darius didn't normally wake up so early, but for the past month or so, his life had been anything but normal. His little brother had disappeared off the face of the earth, presumed to have been killed in a plane crash. Darius had moved closer to his parents for the beginning of that, stayed in a hotel room for a week or so. He'd done his best to console them, to remain rock steady and calm. He'd deterred anybody with unwanted questions away from his grieving family and had visited the gravestone marked "Francis Joseph St. Ledger".

He'd cried only when he'd thought he was alone.

And then, just when some sense of normality had returned to Darius' life, as he'd returned to work, arranging plans with his girlfriend Kayleigh for July 4th, the country was turned upside down again. Francis was still alive. But his time was short. He'd been placed on Survival of the Fittest.

That had been when Darius had started getting up early. Every morning he'd sweep every last corner of the internet for news on Francis, and when he had time or energy to spare, any of Francis' friends. There had been false reports, claims that Francis had been killed, by sick, twisted people who were still getting pleasure from the slaughter of innocent schoolchildren. Darius had written countless messages, letters, emails, filled with his anger and disgust, all the while searching for news on Francis' well being.

Things had been looking up, recently. Kayleigh had been there every step of the way, sharing his pain and his anger. Francis had been surviving, staying out of harm's way, finding people he knew. For the first time in a month, a Darius had felt a little bit of hope that things would turn out alright.

And then this morning, three hours ago, Darius had found a video showcasing Francis' last moments. He had watched it, rewatched it. Searched the internet for anything else that might contradict it, tell him it was fake. He'd denied its existence, tried to convince himself Francis was okay.

Finally, he'd broken down and had been forced to accept it. Francis was gone. The last memory Darius would have of his brother would be that footage, of him and Megan, of the stairs...

Some part of Darius had always known Francis was almost certainly gone. Ever since the island had been found, and found empty. But Darius had always held onto the hope that somehow, someway, Francis had managed to make it through and survive the whole thing, had somehow managed to win.

But now that hope was gone, and all Darius felt was emptiness. He stared at the laptop screen for several more seconds, registering nothing. His hand moved almost automatically, searching his desk for his phone. His eyes shifted from one screen to another, thumbing through the contacts until he found the one he was looking for. One Rene Dougherty, Francis' best friend. Darius had talked with Rene a little in the past but nothing too extensive. Now though, aside from his parents and Kayleigh, Rene was Darius' first port of call in case he needed someone to talk to. Rene had completely sworn away from watching or reading anything about Survival of the Fittest, so Darius filled him in on that front.

For his part, Rene had told Darius things about Francis. Mundane things; stuff he'd watched, girls he liked, music he'd listened to. Stuff that all of a sudden seemed incredibly meaningful and important.

Darius' finger hovered over the Call button. Rene would find out sooner or later, and it was better coming from a friend than anyone else. But there was just something about it... Darius was unsure about what would happen if he did. Unsure as to Rene's reaction, hell, unsure as to what he was even going to say. Never, never in a million years had he been prepared for an occurrence like this.

Eventually Darius pressed the button and raised the phone to his ear. He'd listen to what Rene sounded like; if the guy sounded like he'd just woken up, like Darius had woken him, then he'd let Rene get back to sleep. Maybe call him later, when he was awake and able to actually process the news.

"Hey, Darius."

Darius felt his heart sink a little, as the voice at the other side of the call sounded alert and awake, not clouded by tiredness as it occasionally was. Darius bit his lip before replying.

"Rene." Another pause. God, what do you say in a situation like this? What the hell can you do?

"You awake then?" It would have to do. Darius had to tread carefully, subtly. Rene replied much quicker than Darius had.

"Yeah. I... I couldn't sleep. Nightmares, that sorta thing."

Darius closed his eyes, breathed in, breathed out. Great. Fucking great. But he'd come this far already, and Rene needed to know.

"Listen, Rene... I... I just checked online... Survival of the Fittest stuff..."

"Right..."

"I... Francis, he... Frankie didn't make it..."

There was silence from Rene's end, and all of a sudden, Darius felt like he needed to say more, to say something aside from just... that.

"It was an accident, something between him and a girl, ain't no-one to blame. It just happened, and she... he just... I don't-"

Darius realised he was talking to himself. The breathing on the other end had vanished; Rene had obviously hung up. Darius held his phone to his ear for a few more seconds, before closing his eyes, and placing the phone on his desk, next to the laptop. He took several deep breaths. In. Out. In. Out. One single muttered sentence to break them up.

"What the hell'd he ever do to deserve this?"

In a few hours, he'd have to phone his parents and relay the same news. It had been hard enough with Rene. Darius couldn't even begin to imagine what their reaction would be. He'd never imagined something like this, ever. Having to tell his mom and dad that his little brother had been killed, that their son was dead.

It was only going to get harder from here.