Self Aid

[Namira]

((Kammy So'oialo continued from Voyage of the Dawn Treader))

And just when she thought she was getting somewhere, fluke chance kicked Kammy in the teeth.

Danger zoned. They'd danger zoned the shipping yard... aka the only place Kam knew for certain that Michelle had been recently. It hadn't been much to go on in the first place, and now even that slender string had been snapped. Short on ideas, low on morale, Kam had spotted this overlook and moved towards it in the vague hope that it would be a good vantage point to try and spy out the area.  No such luck.

Hearing the announcement on the way to her destination; as well as destroying her chances of picking up Michelle's trail, it threw into sharp reality what Kam had done. As if she hadn't already constantly been thinking of the way the gun had kicked in her hand, the way Alex had cried out in pain, Cammy had sobbed... now there was the teeny tiny matter of the deed having been announced to the entire damn island. It wasn't that- okay, maybe Kam was a coward for not wanting other people to know, keeping it a secret to herself. She could handle the guilt, maybe, not really, but she wasn't suicidal or manic depressive, so just about, but her friends knowing... Anyone knowing really. Judgement, fear, shock, that's what people would be holding towards Kam right now, and she hated that.

It was the thought that chased her to sleep, as she curled up out of sheer exhaustion in the corner of the women's bathroom, using a hoodie as a blanket.


When she awoke a few hours later, it felt as if her head was splitting in two. Kammy swore, then wished she hadn't as it sent pain arching across her skull. Oh fuck, she was dumb dumb dumb! She'd got so damn excited about the search, then so damn despondent about the danger zone, that she'd forgotten to treat the huge fucking cut!

Kam jumped to her feet and then wished she hadn't, stumbling to the side and catching herself from falling only by dint of slamming into the wall. She let out a groan that was one part pain and one part frustration, then turning, allowed herself to slide down to the floor again. Okay, okay. She had to treat this before it got all infected and screwed up. If it wasn't already.

She could do this, right? Michelle had talked to her about first aiding before, admittedly it had been the midst of a bunch of other stuff, and Kammy had been busy and not paying one hundred percent attention... but the basics were there. Kam hoped the basics were there.

So she... had to clean it first. Kammy moved across to her bags, turfed the first aid kit out of her daypack, grimacing as the motion caused several magazines of ammunition to spill out onto the floor, rattling onto the tiles. With the kit in hand, Kammy grabbed onto a sink and hauled herself back to her feet again - goddammit, her arm was stiff too. She took a glance and winced, blocking Alex's attacks had left the flesh bruised black and yellow. It looked nasty. Kam glanced into the mirror.

Well. That was worse.

The whole left side of her face was covered in dried blood, making her look like she was wearing some kind of macabre mask. The caking got worse the higher up it was, terminating just below her hairline with a gory matting of scabbed and bruised skin. Holy shit, it was like she'd been made up for a freaking zombie walk or something, except with actual blood and actual injuries. It was matted into her hair too, and that was almost the clincher, wasn't it? Dumb and petty maybe, but Kammy always spent so much damn time making sure it looked good and to see it in such a fucking state was...

Nevermind. Cleaning.

Kammy tried the faucet on the sink, and to her surprise found that after a few sputtering seconds, that there was running water. She gave it a dubious look. It was stained a light brown... probably rust. There wasn't much of an option here though, and after a moment's hesitation, Kam took a pad out of the kit and ran it under the stream. The next few minutes were occupied just cleaning up her face, avoiding the actual wound and tackling the blood. With the crimson mask mostly cleared, Kammy tried a smile on for size. It looked just as weak and forced as it felt.

No more procrastinating, time to handle the wound itself. Kam looked at herself.

"This is gonna suck."

So disinfectant was a thing, right? She had this, she had this. There was alcohol in the medkit, alcohol pads, according to the text. So if she used that, she could make sure it was... sterilised, or something. Kammy tore open the packaging and gingerly swiped it across the wound-

"FUCK! OHFUCKING FUUUCK!"

Stinging wasn't even the word to describe it, that burned, and burned bad. Her hand had jerked away too, halfway torn the scabbing, and now she was bleeding again. Kam just stood and stared at herself for a couple of seconds. Tears in her hand, a trickle of blood running down past her eye. Well, it wasn't going to get any easier, was it? Kammy gritted her teeth and went for it.

The pain made her want to scream herself raw, repeating the mantra over and over in her head that it was going to be over soon, that she couldn't make noise unless someone else came along. Kam wanted to puke.

And then it was done. Or near enough done. She didn't even fucking care. The bloody pad was tossed down and a patch of gauze clumsily cut out as Kammy ineptly bandaged her head. She probably needed stitches or something, but so long as she could stop the bleeding... she could worry about field sutures later. Kam didn't trust herself with a needle next to her head, even if there WAS one in the medkit.

Kam looked at herself one last time. Yep, still resembled shit. Haggard, pale, a bandage awkwardly strapped around her skull. She'd wasted enough time though; it was time to resume the search.

Gathering her things up, Kam headed out the door.


((Kammy continued in Mass Destruction))